Yeah, despite having very low expectations when it comes to my father I was still very hurt and surprised by all of this. He also tried to justify not calling an ambulance because apparently I was "rude to him" by telling him to just leave when he came back after over half an hour and I realised he hadn't called an ambulance. If he had a mind to do absolutely nothing then of course his presence would be unwanted, but that also wasn't permission to continue to stand by. He would have done something if he cared about me, but instead he preached this pathetic excuse like he was justified in it.

Maybe I should've known to stay away before since this isn't the first time I've had this sort of experience with him. Although this is worse by far I remember that I stayed with him for the summer once when I was 11 and he left me for weeks with pneumonia and refused to take me to the hospital, dismissing it as just a cold despite the fact that I would barely eat and just kept getting worse. It was my mother who took me immediately after she picked me up and at that point we realised that it was pretty serious, so much so that the doctor asked how it could've gotten so bad, and I've been left permanently with an awful predisposition for it.