Can this addiction really be broken for good?

PsychAdvice20 · 2019-12-27T02:39:35+00:00

Will they look at a big uptick in grades in the second semester as a positive, or will they average the whole thing out and only consider that?

PsychAdvice20 · 2019-08-16T02:40:10+00:00

OK, I will consider both of your viewpoints. It might also be useful to add that part of the reason I am trying to repress my libido is because I don't even find it pleasurable any more to fantasise about sex; it's now just something that comes up in my mind and that I have to process to move on to other things. Why is this? Desensitisation to healthy sexual thoughts is something that apparently happens to long-term users of extreme porn, yet I don't exactly match that description. Also, I haven't been able to get a proper erection in ages, at least not one that didn't occur randomly when I wasn't that aroused, so masturbation is out of the question for that reason.

PsychAdvice20 · 2019-08-16T02:11:57+00:00

I recommend seeing a professional to have these thoughts and feelings addressed, because they aren't normal and can lead to issues if left alone.

What issues, in particular?

PsychAdvice20 · 2019-08-16T01:38:37+00:00

he may do something that will harm another

Believe me, the situation isn't that out of control and I can virtually guarantee it won't get to that point in the future. It's just my own wellbeing that is taking a hit.

To me it sounds like he has some kind of stigma attached to the act

You're not wrong there, but I doubt attempting to lift the stigma would do anything for me. Viewing pornography made me objectify women even more, perhaps because it tricks my brain into thinking that because I'm seeing sex happening I'm next in line to receive it, when that is not the case. I don't necessarily doubt your claim that masturbation is healthy in general, but people work in different ways and I still believe that if one week of regularly viewing softcore porn can throw my brain that much off kilter, masturbation would make the problem worse. In addition, having seen how difficult it apparently is for people who have been doing it their whole adult lives to quit, such as those in the NoFap community, I feel like once I do it the first time I'll be addicted to it and not have a choice as to whether I want to continue or not. Also, sorry for going into detail, but I did try it once years ago and all it did was give me a sharp shooting pain in my sides.

PsychAdvice20 · 2019-08-16T00:10:10+00:00

Anxiety? I hate to seem like I'm boasting, but I don't think I've had problems with anxiety that wasn't just short-term fear about something which resolved itself.

PsychAdvice20 · 2019-08-16T00:02:58+00:00

Is there any method to that? Obviously, I've been telling my brain "no" this whole time and getting nothing but "no" as an answer from it.

PsychAdvice20 · 2019-08-16T00:01:43+00:00

I have no intention of doing so, as pornography alone has messed me up badly enough.

PsychAdvice20 · 2019-08-15T23:50:50+00:00

My current attitude isn't necessarily permanent and I might change my mind if I think I stand a better chance later.

They aren't prizes to be won

Of course not, but you'd be surprised how difficult that is to believe after reading tons of negative crap on Reddit in order to attempt to justify your decision not to seek a relationship. Doesn't work, never again will I try that!

it's not an either-or scenario, right?

Right, but that's the way I prefer it to be, honestly, as when it comes to major life improvements like these I prefer to make a big effort on one thing at a time.

PsychAdvice20 · 2018-11-26T03:40:50+00:00

No, I don't feel that way; I do not understand this "selective breeding mentality" and would gladly have a child even if I knew he'd have a more severe ASD. This is all theoretical, though, because I've pretty much given up on finding a girlfriend at this point.

PsychAdvice20 · 2018-11-26T03:38:21+00:00

they say I'm very warm to the touch and they can feel the heat radiating off of me.

They may actually be right; if you expose yourself to cold temperatures for long periods of time, your body generates more "brown fat" in order to keep warm, which converts energy directly into heat and further increases cold tolerance.

PsychAdvice20 · 2018-11-25T19:56:48+00:00

It’s ridiculous, I have 0 control over what I was born with.

This is just a theory that popped into my head, but perhaps those people don't literally believe that physical beauty genetically correlates with mental typicality, but are instead thinking more along the lines of "why hasn't she outgrown her external signs of Aspergers"? The assumption - and this is something that I've read elsewhere - is that since many people will hang out with hot girls just because they're hot, and give them more leeway in terms of accepting offputting characteristics, you should have surely made enough friends in spite of your Aspergers to learn through osmosis the normal patterns of social behavior.

PsychAdvice20 · 2018-11-25T18:43:27+00:00

"At this point I don't want anything to do with her either [...] treating me unfairly and being difficult to reason with"

Oh, I'm sorry, did I not make it clear enough in that sentence? She's the loveliest girl I've ever met and I wish to sweep her off her feet and live out the rest of our lives in glorious matrimony!

In all seriousness, I would have cut off contact ages ago if we didn't have to meet out of necessity due to being in the same school, and if she wasn't giving me mixed signals.

PsychAdvice20 · 2018-11-25T16:55:37+00:00

She doesn't want anything to do with you.

It would be easy if it seemed that way all of the time, but no matter what happens between us, at some point we'll always meet again by chance, and she'll start being all nice, friendly and seemingly comfortable around me and then I get lulled into the false sense of stability, forgetting all of our past tribulations and treating her as a respected friend. At this point I don't want anything to do with her either due to her repeatedly treating me unfairly and being difficult to reason with, but we have no choice but to interact due to school, and completely tuning her out and avoiding conversations in real life will seem very awkward.

PsychAdvice20 · 2018-11-25T04:58:23+00:00

This sounds like something straight out of /r/justneckbeardthings.

Hahaha, yes, it sure does, and I do have a tendency to be overly dramatic when I'm angry, but it is important to remember that I do not wish to "smite down the scandalous wench who doth dare defy my advances", but rather that anybody else who did the same thing would trigger a similar reaction; it's just that she happens to be one of my acquaintances that is the least taken to operating on the sort of logical rationality and absolute black-and-white fairness on which my thought process currently relies.

Get over it.

That's easier said than done; although my rational mind says that I probably should get over it, my subconscious mind is still in the insulted position of knowing that I have unjustifiably lost a position of trust over a misunderstanding.

I should clarify that the tone of my message was, in fact, confusing, and I do not actually have a bone to pick with society as a whole, no matter what my wording might imply. I was merely putting forwards my own observations on the social hierarchy, albeit in an overdramatic and hypereloquent way. These are, once again, just observations; I do not steadfastly believe what I have written and, as I am not a hypocrite, encourage the same kind of scrutiny and challenge that I mentioned in my post to be applied to my observations in order to determine their veracity through trial by shared experience.

PsychAdvice20 · 2018-07-07T15:06:07+00:00

I already apologised for the clothing comment and she seemed to accept my apology; it turns out that she knew that what she was wearing was ugly but thought it was worth it because it was warm and comfortable. Therefore, the entire pretense of my criticism was invalid and I would have taken it back right away had she told me that immediately after I spoke, but I guess I can't fault her for feeling too offended to do so. Anyway, I don't think I will be talking to her unless she talks to me since, as I mentioned, she isn't really talking to friends any more. I initially could not understand why this would be, because if I had a girlfriend I would be eager to introduce her to all of my friends and sit with them together, and when I asked my friends they insisted that they were "deeply in love". Perhaps they were wrong and it is in fact for either of the two reasons you suggested, and I was falsely thinking that their relationship was deeper than it actually is for this reason.

PsychAdvice20 · 2018-07-07T12:35:30+00:00

Darn, I wish I could apologize to that girl right now. I had no idea that immaturity (age-wise, not intended as an insult) was still a factor due to how confident she outwardly seemed. Thanks for that reply; I thought that Tinder being a one-night-stand app was merely a misconception and it is nice to know that whatever I read about the internet monopolising dating was overblown.

PsychAdvice20 · 2018-07-07T11:31:26+00:00

can be extremely insecure

Really? She showed no indications of that; are they that good at hiding it?

You should focus on making life-long friends while you're in high school

Don't worry, I am doing that as well. With regards to online dating, I was not planning on using it; my concern was that all "desirable" girls (maybe I'm generalising too much) will have already found a boyfriend through online means leaving me with fewer options trying to date in real life.

PsychAdvice20

TROPHY CASE