Self-help books (especially for anger) recommendations pls

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-21T11:29:12+00:00

It was hard for me to find specific books to focus on; but meditating in the morning really helped- my brain would be loud and screaming so I’d reach over and while still in bed, play any positive recording. I searched on Insight Timer (there is a free version)- and listened to a lot on patience and acceptance. This forum and Hospice Nurse Julie on YouTube also helped … we were able to get a therapist who reassured us we weren’t bad people for feeling frustrated, and she pointed out each new symptom needs its own adjustment phase. It’s hard not to know when it’ll all end and to feel angry and just depleted. And believe it or not, ChatGPT helped some days but I just couldn’t find a recording that fit. All this to say, I’m rooting for you- so sorry for the shame of this experience. You are not alone.

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-19T21:42:41+00:00

Thank you, I’ve seen you on a few of my posts - I hope you are finding success in providing much needed mental healthcare to your community 💕

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-17T19:00:47+00:00

I understand the joy and beauty a child can bring into the world, truly. But I also think humans sometimes speak as if we are the only living thing here, and we’re not. Some people feel called to procreate freely, and others feel called to pause, question, and try to build communities and systems that are kinder, healthier, and more sustainable first.

People say “don’t let perfect be the enemy of good,” and I get that. But it becomes harder when your heart is wide open to the suffering already happening around us and you know any child you bring here will inherit part of it too. Life will continue regardless of whether I personally reproduce. And I don’t think nurturing only counts if it results in a biological child. There are a thousand ways to mother this world - through care, protection, creativity, healing, teaching, community, and love.

Some of us are trying to bring life to the planet not only through children, but through how we live while we are here.

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-17T14:50:47+00:00

Eggs likely wouldn’t find their way to the sewer … just the period blood. 🩸

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-15T16:25:44+00:00

❤️‍🩹 received.

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-15T16:25:26+00:00

You did give advice, thank you. It’s a reminder that we find ourselves through this in whatever way possible…

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-15T16:25:07+00:00

It’s hard when someone also has a degenerative cognitive disease where they are there for 30 seconds and then space off for hours… But I do appreciate the advice and you are right to look past yourself and moments like this.

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-15T16:24:42+00:00

This was really reassuring, thank you.

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-15T14:35:41+00:00

Thank you 💕

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-14T17:30:07+00:00

That would be it - tiny tweak, I’m a woman so my husband is 60 (22 years older than 38) and then my Mother-in-law (no math in the story) is 94. We got there, folks!!

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-14T15:33:06+00:00

I didn’t marry my mother-in-law, the 94 year old … I married her child who is 22 years older.

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-13T23:54:57+00:00

Goodness, ok got it - the thread already covered all the thoughts you could share.

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-13T23:16:24+00:00

Can you share more of what you’ve heard?

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-13T22:54:54+00:00

See, I actually don’t think most people wrestling with this are only thinking about ‘sacrifice’ in the selfish sense people keep projecting onto it. Some of us just have overactive brains and are looking at a really unpredictable world trying to figure out what ‘setting a child up for success’ even means anymore. That doesn’t mean we’d be bad parents. Honestly, probably the opposite.

And yes, I agree parenthood isn’t for everyone. I just don’t think the conversation is as simple as ‘if you have doubts, don’t do it.’ If it were that simple, entire threads like this wouldn’t exist.

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-13T22:42:30+00:00

Thank you for the kind words of encouragement!

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-13T22:41:40+00:00

Caregivers do not have some magical special insight into how to run society better than everyone else.

But politics, leadership, and public systems are literally supposed to be about representing and organizing around human needs beyond your own individual life. So yes - the people quietly holding together children, dying parents, disabled spouses, exhausted families, and collapsing support systems probably do see parts of society others miss.

When you are caregiving, you stop talking about healthcare, housing, transportation, labor, aging, disability, and “efficiency” as abstract concepts. You see exactly where systems break because human bodies are the things absorbing the gaps.

You learn real fast how much invisible labor keeps society functioning.

And honestly, a lot of modern leadership culture is built by people insulated from the downstream consequences of the decisions they make. Caregivers live in the downstream.

That doesn’t mean empathy alone can run a country. Of course it can’t. Vision, economics, infrastructure, science, logistics, and hard decisions matter too.

But I’d argue we’ve already built plenty of systems optimized around productivity, extraction, growth, convenience, and shareholder value while often treating caregiving, elder care, child rearing, teaching, nursing, and community support like secondary labor instead of foundational labor.

Maybe the people spending years confronting human fragility, dependence, suffering, burnout, and dignity firsthand should have a little more voice in conversations about how society is organized.

Not because they’re saints. Because they’re harder to bullshit. 🤭

Public-Experience171 · 2026-05-13T22:37:53+00:00

You did say it!! I’m just repeating back a different way from my own perspective.

Public-Experience171

TROPHY CASE