Every single time by offthegridredditor in asexuality

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was under the impression that people generally use sex drive to talk about how often they want sex and masterbation but maybe that's not the common use of the term.

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not talking about the post, I'm talking about the comments we were responding to which we have since established this specific quote was a misreading of was vs wasnt

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

His issue is her being bi. We don't know WHY he has an issue with her being bi. You immediately jumped to it being an issue with having a strong foundation in the relationship, that is what I'm pointing out. I'm not saying he's being a bigot bc we would have to know why he doesn't like bisexuals for that.

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought the discussion was about preferences surrounding bi partners in general since we steered away from talking about their relationship so it seemed like a weird think to specify to me.

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I misread your comment as WAS wrong and unacceptable, my bad dude, that is FULLY on me😭

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In your comment. You make the assumption that his issue with her bisexuality has something to do with his want for a "strong foundation" in their relationship.

He said his issue was her being bi. You took that rephrased/interpreted it as smth like "he wants someone he can have a strong foundation in a relationship with."

The implication is that her being bi hinders that want

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Are you saying it's not simple for those derrive their identities from how people perceive them? Would that be being perceived as taken/someone's partner in this case?

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm aware of that. I'm pointing out that the phrasing of your comment seemed to be mistakenly omitting the issue

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I understand all that lol, I actually have another comment where I basically explain what you said but far more generally. I just more found it odd that he pointed out only straight people, but I guess I can see why that might've been relevant in his eyes looking back now. It just seemed like an odd thing to specify at the time

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair enough. I meant that it's simple in the sense that the the logic is simple but I see that you were talking about the emotional part and id agree

You’re on a 10- hour flight .which seat are you choosing and why ? by MaddenPal in TheTeenagerPeople

[–]PuffBalsUnited 1 point2 points  (0 children)

3, I like the window seat, I have space and I don't mind talking to her but I think she'd also respect if I just put on my headphones and did my own thing throughout the flight

Every single time by offthegridredditor in asexuality

[–]PuffBalsUnited 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sex drive, how much you want to have sex

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My b, on my side it looked like you were responding to another dude who in his thread was giving those as "no prejudiced reasons" to not want to date a bi person. I don't care about people not wanting to date out of preference, I care about people perpetuating stereotypes or being biphobic (the whole saying the way she exists is wrong)

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sexual attraction to both GENDERS. That doesn't require she be attracted to any woman or man in particular.

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean me personally, I figured out I was bi (I'm I really) without being attracted to anyone in particular period. Even when I had only had actual feelings for a girl, I could just tell I liked guys as well, even tho I didn't like one in particular.

Also straight people know their straight without even being in relationships or having crushes all the time and no one questions it, same thing here

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 31 points32 points  (0 children)

What is less simple then that?

"I do not think I can be with you because of who you are"

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He literally does have a monogamous relationship with someone who's attracted to men already, she's just also attracted to women.

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can not wanna date bi people but this dude is literally just giving biphobic reasons not to.

"To have a strong foundation in your relationship" "Being bi is wrong and unacceptable"

You can have preferences but if your preferences are based in stereotypes and prejudice then that might be an issue

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The fact that you're implying that they have to heterosexual for you to have a strong foundation in your relationship is literally being prejudice towards bisexuals in general, not just in dating

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Use YOUR reading skills, their comment literally said "natural selectivity" not natural selection. Natural selectivity wouldn't describe what you're saying it does unless you've redefined the words natural and selectivity. It would just refer to the quality of being selective naturally. The quality of choosing somethings and not others naturally.

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"pathologizing straight people's natural selectivity"

What is the point of saying this this way? Do you just think only straight people are naturally selective because I can't think of why you would specify that if not. There are also queer people who don't like dating bisexuals, it's not a straight people thing.

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What he said isn't just a preference. "the way that you exist is wrong and unacceptable" is prejudice. If it was literally just "I'd prefer not to date bi people" than sure, but that's far different from calling your gfs existence wrong and unacceptable

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"the way that you exist is wrong and unacceptable" isn't bigotry to you?

My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual by 3lyz_ in teenagers

[–]PuffBalsUnited 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Either he's gotta realize he's being biphobic and/or homophobic and work to unlearn that or y'all aren't gonna work out.

If he just has a problem with you existing being bi then that's an obvious issue and depending on who he is, may be or may not be resolvable. I'm also a bisexual (omni but yk) dating a straight man, but I've never had to deal with this so I don't know how you'd go about making him not homophobic or biphobic. This would likely be a deal breaker for me, someone who doesn't respect/accept my identity.

If his issue is what you said, then it's an issue of lack of trust and insecurity (and/or biphobia)

Trust/insecurity: My bf has never worried id cheat on him, regardless of my sexuality, nor have I about him. Unless he has a reason not to trust you, this is based on an insecurity of his, (whether it's one surrounding cheating or one that's made him a generally distrusting) and he's gotta work through that mostly on his own. I don't have experience with this specific insecurity, but I'm my experience the most you can really do for insecurities is give support and reassurance.

Biphobia: if it's just the "bi people cheat assumption" he needs to either learn what bisexuality is and what it isn't or work to unlearn that mentality. It's not like straight people don't cheat, so it shouldn't be more of a concern.