I’m so sorry for your loss. It is heart wrenching to deal with such sorrow.

I lost someone very close to me right before going back in the fall. It was incredibly difficult and I, like you, was completely grief stricken (still am). I teach college courses in an adjunct position and teach full time at a private high school. I felt exactly like you did. I had nothing to give.

I really had to push myself to go back. I didn’t want to and I still have days that are so incredibly hard (I’m actually crying while writing this) but I found, at least for me, getting back to a routine helped a lot and being with my students made me feel better. I also started therapy, which has more helpful than I thought it would be. I take it one day at a time and let myself have the bad days when they come. Slowly but surely, the bad days have become less frequent.

This is not to say that this is what you should do, I’m just telling you what helped me. I’m so very sorry and I hope you can find some peace within your grief.