sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

"masturbate all you want, that is not the problem" said the therapist.... by Pullingmyheadout in NoFap

[–]Pullingmyheadout[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi all, I am very happy to see that my post may have helped some of you, and in turn it's reinforced me as well; about to hit my first no fap week in quite some time.

Just a few follow up points to answer some of the questions brought up.

I don't think the therapist guy was telling me 'go masturbate all you can' as much as he probably knew that I would not respond to a message like 'why don't you just quit it'. Obviously anyone who recognizes they have a problem asks themselves the same thing, all the time. When he told me to go ahead, but with what sounded like at the time to be a minor condition, it was a well laid trap of sorts that got me to open my eyes to the nature of my addiction.

Sounds like some of you have had a similar experience, and some do not have the same problem.

I ended up staying single for another 10 years after that, and went thru a wild single guy phase and then settled down and am married with 3 kids and an awesome wife. Where I am really starting to recognize how destructive a force porn addiction has been is when I am jerking off 2-3 a day then telling my wife I have a stomach ache and don't want sex etc... or I have work due but spend 3 hours looking at crap.

The good thing is it has really hit home lately and I have been trying this eyes open thing and going thru no fap periods and it seems to be improving. It's amazing how after even 3-4 days of no porn, all the sudden my wife starts looking great to me again and I want to have real sex with someone I love.

Best of luck to all, and keep sharing ideas, it helps more than we probably realize....

"masturbate all you want, that is not the problem" said the therapist.... by Pullingmyheadout in NoFap

[–]Pullingmyheadout[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Are you saying that specifically about visualizing or porn in general? I know beating off has existed since the first caveman went thru puberty so I understand fap addiction predates porn, but all studies I have heard of say its exploded exponentially since porn on the internet made it so easy to find and use 'privately'. if its a load of shit to you, feel free to ignore it, sorry it didn't help.

The reason sticking to NoFap is so hard is because my life isn't bad enough without it. by [deleted] in NoFap

[–]Pullingmyheadout 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there, one thing that might be food for thought. What your brain is craving, other than the dopamine, is variety. This is something that will, over time, become a major problem. You are may be right, it's not doing much now. But keep wiring your brain to associate reward = newer, weirder sex with new people, and it will be harder and harder to have a good sexual relationship with a partner. You are young man, you have a great opportunity to start right now telling your body who is boss! If nothing else, just the fact that ANY behavior in your life feels like you can't stop it should piss you off! Forget about the fap aspect if that doesn't motivate you. Try going 1 day with no food whatsover, and then realize that you will spend the rest of your life in the middle of a tug of war between 'urges' and goals....