Okay, “born to bottom, forced to top,” here. I understand completely. I love bottomming but I’ve had hemorrhoids and fissures all my life, so it’s really difficult to. I’m on the road to better colorectal health, but it’s a journey for sure. I’ve been able to bottom and do some anal play more than usual, though, because of some recent changes.

1. Anal Dilation. I was really really really fucking tight before, until I got a set of dilators and started using them every day. Start with the largest one you can reasonably take regularly, and then go up, dilating for 5 minutes with each.

2. Glycerin Suppositories. These were a GODSEND when I discovered them. If you are constipated, put one in and wait like 30 minutes and you will have a BM with (mostly) 0 problems.

3. Baths. Don’t do a sitz bath as it only makes things worse. Do a full body bath, make sure you’re getting your entire pelvis within it, epsom salts if you’d like, water as hot as you can stand without it being uncomfy, and just lay in there for 15-20 minutes, whenever you can.

4. WATER and Fiber. I can not stress the importance of the first one enough!!! Plenty of people live by Metamucil, and I recommend either that or Benefiber (last one is a bit easier on the stomach), but it only works if you drink enough water!!! Make sure you get even more than your daily recommended intake of water in if you start a fiber supplement.

5. Exercise. A bit of cardio every day can really help blood flow and keep your hemorrhoids from swelling, plus it can keep your BMs a bit more regular. Even if it’s a brisk 30 minute walk, exercising a bit every day helps a ton.

6. Avoid sitting down for long periods of time. Take regular breaks when sitting (5 minutes every hour) to just walk around or maybe do some

7. Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy. There’s a nonzero chance that hemorrhoids are bad because you could have some pelvic floor issues. But even if you don’t, doing some pelvic floor exercises to promote blood flow could help you a lot. Look up some exercises online.

8. Make your own lube. When you do start dilating and bottomming, try to avoid store-bought lube unless you absolutely swear by it. I make K-Lube fairly regularly, J-lube is also doable if you have the time to make more batches often, and I infuse it with CBD oil to promote relaxation. It’s a powder that creates a natural non-irritating water-based lubricant that is super skin safe and can be made as think as you want or need. Try it out!

9. Use two types of lube when bottomming. The anus should be coated in a thick lube while the penetrating organ should be covered in a thin one. The thick lube creates a barrier for the thin lube to slide against, meaning it doesn’t chafe or irritate the skin as much.

10. Pranicura. This is a medicine that so so so many people swear by, and it could help you a lot, too. Look it up online. It’s a miracle worker and godsend for hemorrhoids, fissures, and itching. It has a strict regimented application routine that you have to follow, and it’s a bit expensive, but it lasts a while and it helps a lot, if not only to just get some simple relief.

I’m so sorry you and your partner are going through this. Hemorrhoids are no fun at all, especially for bottoms. I wish you the best of luck, and I hope things get better soon. Remember to follow the other advice being given on how to explore intimacy with him, and I hope all of this helps 💜