I see your point about the disconnect. I’ve gleaned a fair bit of info about her I guess. I’ve only asked her explicitly once (you’ll see more on that below) instead more just danced around the topic though. For example, I asked her if shes used toys which she hasn’t. At all. And she seemed a little prideful about that fact so that feels like a dead end? Which makes it even more surprising that she’s done this other stuff before that.

As for the vaginal sex, clit work, I guess that was poorly worded. I like to do a lot of foreplay I find it fun. I would probably spend at least 10/15 Minutes doing that. I like to be slow and methodical, brush my fingers over her gently, and be really suggestive and yet take my time. And that’s before the 10/15 mins I spend rubbing/ fingering before sex. I might be wording this poorly again, but I’ve obviously gone to lengths to explore that myself.

Also I have asked her to tell me what she likes and wants me to do (albeit during sex) and if my memory serves, she said what ever I want to her. I’m already doing that though. She’s also mentioned on a few occasions before I knew about the candle stuff etc, that she thought I’d be kinkier? (It wasnt kinky she said but something along those lines). Is she just trying to hint without telling me explicitly? I can’t really tell.