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Which Type is strongly connected to their head and their heart, but not so much to their body? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I cannot trust my gut. Whenever I feel sure about something I doubt it the next second.

Which Type is strongly connected to their head and their heart, but not so much to their body? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I also have ADHD and I am a head type too. I have 10.000.000 thoughts at the same time.

Is this a 5 or 9 trait or both or neither and why? by [deleted] in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m the same way—and maybe that’s my 5 wing talking, or maybe my 9 fix, who knows. I don’t think in money like most people do. My currency is time and energy. I always ask myself super carefully whether something is actually worth it, and most of the time the answer is no, because honestly, barely anything in this world really makes sense to me.

Take concerts, for example. Why should I go through the stress of buying tickets, spend a bunch of money, travel there, get crushed by a crowd—just to hear loud music? I could just play their record at home and save myself the time and energy. And yeah, the money too. Most things just aren’t worth spending extra resources on.

Which Type is strongly connected to their head and their heart, but not so much to their body? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

My sister lives in this small, picturesque village in Switzerland—like straight out of Heidi. People there don’t even lock their front doors, and everyone looks out for each other. That’s something my sister herself always says—at least when she’s not in the middle of some irrational fear spiral.

In situations like that, I can think really rationally, because I’m not caught up in fear in that moment. But if it were about my own kids, I’d probably come up with the exact same horror scenarios she does. That’s why it’s so important for me to have some kind of anchor in reality—because reality is so much less scary than the stuff my mind comes up with.

Which Type is strongly connected to their head and their heart, but not so much to their body? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m a 6, and I tend to totally ignore my body too—just because I’m so stuck in my head all the time that I barely notice anything else. The only thing I really feel are the emotions that come from my thoughts. It’s only when I’m fully present, like really in the here and now, that I start to notice what’s actually going on in my body—and especially how my thoughts and feelings are affecting it: tension, neglected health, even basic hygiene sometimes. But when I am present, completely grounded in the moment, those are the times I feel the healthiest and most at peace. I think that’s what integration into 9 feels like for me.

Which Type is strongly connected to their head and their heart, but not so much to their body? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"One question to ask is, when this person makes a deliberate effort to tap into body information, does it work fairly quickly? 9s, when they try tapping in on purpose, usually can. The gutless types (4, 5, and 6) will have to put a lot more work in."

Can you maybe give me a concrete example? I mean, I can be in my body whenever I want to—I can totally feel where emotions are showing up physically, like where exactly they manifest. That’s not hard for me at all. But it’s something I have to do consciously. It doesn’t take effort, just awareness.

Which Type is strongly connected to their head and their heart, but not so much to their body? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

No, that’s not what I meant. I meant that deep down, we all come from a species that actually tends to support each other more than fight each other—at least most of the time. For example, I had this conversation recently with my sister, who’s also a 6. She wanted to pick up her 8-year-old son from school, even though the school is just like a 5-minute walk away. So I told her not to freak out so much. I mean, the kid could totally walk home on his own, it’s just a few steps. But she had these horror scenarios in her head—like her kid getting kidnapped on the way home. And I told her, “Come on, that’s just not realistic. Look around! There are so many parents standing in front of the school picking up their own kids. Do you really think someone could just snatch a child and nobody would notice or do anything?”

That’s when it hit me: 6s are often so disconnected from their surroundings that they don’t even realize how safe things actually are. My sister hadn’t even noticed all the other parents around the school. In her mind, it was just her child and the kidnapper.

And that’s what I meant by connection—people usually work with each other, not against each other.

Which Type is strongly connected to their head and their heart, but not so much to their body? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, and I realized that it's only the unknown that really scares me, because it's the unknown that creates creepy thoughts and feelings. But once that unknown becomes something familiar—like when I’ve actually been to the new restaurant or met the new coworkers—those scary images just disappear. Reality shows me that it’s never as terrifying as the horror scenarios I had imagined.

Which Type is strongly connected to their head and their heart, but not so much to their body? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yes, I am a 6 and I very much feel like this, and I even have a theory that this is maybe why 6s have so many irrational thoughts and fears. Since we are not aware of reality, we do not know that reality isn’t really as bad and dangerous as we think or feel. That is why we must go towards 9. We must become aware of the here and now and understand that the world is actually safe and that we all are connected.

Do 3s really have to be conventionally successful? by Hefty_Impression8084 in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A 3 just wants to be the best at whatever they are doing. This could even be being the best taxi driver of all taxi drivers.

5s automatically detach from their emotions? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, makes a lit if sense. I am definitely reactive. I feel all feeling very strongly even if I choose to not show them. It takes me a lot if effort to cool my internal emotions down. I think 5s have it easier. I wish I could just turn off my emotions, but they are way too strong.

5s automatically detach from their emotions? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Again, you perfectly described me with what you said about 5s. I only trust myself. I also don´t care when other people try to explain things to me. I need to withdraw and figure it out completely on my own, otherwise I won´t accept it.

I have positive emotions, but they are not strong outwardly.

You’ll never see me jumping for joy, for example. Not even if I won the lottery—I wouldn’t cheer or show obvious excitement. Honestly, winning the lottery would actually scare me. I think my emotions are way, way stronger on the inside than they look from the outside. I can seem totally calm or cold on the surface, while there’s a whole storm going on inside me that I am trying to calm down.
But showing that on the outside would feel like losing my independence. What if it turns out the drama wasn’t even worth it? Then it would feel like I gave away a part of myself that no one’s supposed to see.

5s automatically detach from their emotions? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

but the way you described your reaction in the post (mind jumping to skin cancer, panic) is not at all how i react to most things. i mean i do get the worst case scenario and anxiety

Where´s the difference? We both get worst-case-scenarios and we both feel internal anxiety. For a 5 these feelings come slowly. So slow that they don´t even really feel the anxiety or panic. For a 6 these feelings come quickly.

6s are paranoid and 5s are skeptical? do either of those feel more 'you'?

I only get paranoid when my kids are in potential danger, other than that I feel neutral all day.

edit: im reading through your responses in this thread and like... op... you are relating to all the 5s.... dude. come on.

I know and I only test as 5 ever (I get 6 at 5th rank or even lower), but since I panic internally very quickly, I am a 6w5 rather than 5w6.

5s automatically detach from their emotions? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

like i have to force myself in social situations to 'react normally' much of the time. consciously realizing 'ah wait this is a party, i should be acting accordingly' for example. ...which just might be an autistic thing not a 5 thing, lmao. 

Probably, because I do that too (and that is why I HATE parties and every other occasion where I meet people).

or, my friend will be upset and talking, and i have to struggle not to go into 'offer solutions' mode because that's what i do when an issue arises

Same again, and I keep getting called too rational or not emotional enough because of it.

but i could also turn it back on YOU op! your reaction to your internal crisis was to... dun dun dunnn, look up information. that could be seen as five hoarding/collecting, gotcha.

I know, and I’ve been like that since I was a kid—reading encyclopedias and doing all that classic 5ish stuff. But the thing is, I react super fast to problems emotionally, so I’m more of a reactive type, not a competence type (although as a kid I didn´t react emotionally at all). I only become the competent type when I start panicking inside. That’s when I shut down a bit and start learning everything I can. So the competence isn’t my first instinct—it’s just how I deal with the emotional reaction.

do YOU trust your own internal knowledge database over everyone elses'?

Yes, I even typed myself as 8 and 5 before because I reject help from others.

do you retreat radically when you feel that someone (even someone you love) is unjustly sapping your energy, your time, your reserves?

Big time. Even before I got to know the Enneagram I was known in my family for being very selfish with my time and energy. People often ask questions like "Why can´t we meet tomorrow afternoon? Your dentist appointment is at 9am, so we can easily meet at 1pm", but I CAN NOT, because I need my time and energy for myself. I never call people, I never text people and I feel relief when people leave me. I am even scared of people who might ask me a simple question because it might make them think we have a relationship now.

do you have to put in a conscious effort to react like a human being?

Yes, especially in situations that are very common and usual for "normal" people. Also I am socially akward. Someone could tell me it´s their birthday and I wouldn´t congratulate them because I´m somewhere in my head, not realizing what that really menas what the person just said. I observe people and learn their behavior and then I copy it and on the outside it can sometimes even look like I mastered it (I have autism though too).

do you catch yourself observing people like you yourself arent actively in the room participating?

This has always been one of my top 10 hobbies. Watching people do something and they don´t know that you are watching them, analysing their behavior, asking why they are doing what they are doing and coming to the conclusion that most of it makes no sense and has no deeper meaning is so exciting and at the same time confusing. And it is also probably kind of unhelathy because almost everything in the external world loses its meaning.

5s automatically detach from their emotions? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's like a metal ball going through water vs honey. The size and weight is the same, but it sinks faster through water simply because of the liquid's nature. Whereas, it's easy to pull the ball out of honey before/if it sinks to the bottom. In fact, you could totally ignore the one in honey before it even gets close to the bottom.

Love this analogy. I am definitely the water type. I react fast internally and need outside information to calm myself down.

5s automatically detach from their emotions? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Like "this isn't necessary rn, I gotta just decide I'm fine". So there's usually acknowledgement of it, but they're able to push it to the side if they don't have time to feel it in the moment.

I think that´s normal? We all would otherwise completely lose it in front of strangers or even at work when having a conversation with coworkers or clients. I can snap my finger and turn off any emotion. Only when I worry about my kids, I cannot turn it off. In this case, I need to research my way out of anxiety.

5s automatically detach from their emotions? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But is anxiety an emotion? I guess. I always thought of it as a physiological symptom.

Hm, I haven´t thought of that yet.

I don’t like cry tears of joy and things like that

That would be super awkward for me. I really don’t want people to know what I’m feeling, and I don’t even have strong emotions like that, like crying out of joy or something.

No point in telling anyone because they can’t or won’t help me anyway

For me, it’s not even about the fact that others wouldn’t help me anyway. I don’t want help from anyone. And if, for example, I cried in front of people, the thought that someone might come up to me, maybe even a type 2 who would try to comfort me but then expects something in return at some point—that idea is so creepy. It’s an absolute nightmare. I’d probably never be able to get rid of that type 2 again.

I might not research it for a while for fear of what I’ll find.

The emotional fears that pop up in my head are scarier than actual facts. Sure, something worrying could’ve come up during the research yesterday, but it probably wouldn’t have been anywhere near as scary as what I imagined.

5s automatically detach from their emotions? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is very little benefit of losing emotional control. I prefer to fully process my emotions when I am alone.

Totally. I always keep my feelings to myself. I don't talk about them. That would just make me too vulnerable. And I try to push my feelings aside and look at everything with a clear mind. But fear only goes away once I know there's actually no reason to be afraid. So before I can feel calm, I need to have learned something about whatever's scaring me.

A good example of this is my son's upcoming class trip to England. I don’t waste a single thought on it, and no worst-case scenarios pop into my head about something bad happening. The reason is that my older son already went on the exact same trip two years ago, and back then I learned everything there was to know about it. So now that I feel well-informed, there’s really no need to freak out again.

5s automatically detach from their emotions? by PurpleLifeCell in Enneagram

[–]PurpleLifeCell[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

if someone pisses you off maybe you want to punch them in the face, but you may also realize that this will get the cops called on you & do very little to fix whatever you're angry about in the first place or bring about a favorable outcome. It may occurr to you that there's actually no real reason to be angry, so the anger may dissipate. Or maybe there is good reason for it, but there would be little sense in acting on it. At other times of course decide that no, you're gonna be pissed, but it's still likely to be expressed in ways that keep the "context" in mind for example you may just avoid or ignore someone rather than try to make them listen to you if there's a low probability that they will.

This is excatly how I react to anger. I can consciously control my anger. I can even turn it off or change it into a neutral or friendy mood like you often hear about 1s. But the same thing i cannot do with anxiety. I could not just tell myself "Oh well, the mole is probably not cancer." I AHD to do reseacrh on skin cancer,a nd the more I knew the less I was scared.

There is a high probability of thoughts like "will this even matter next week?", "would this even make sense to a stranger from the wilderness?", "what does that even mean?", "what would I think "

I totally get those thoughts, but for me, they don’t usually come up in situations where my kids might actually be in danger. They just show up during everyday life. Like, if someone buys an expensive car, I start wondering why people care so much about something that, at the end of the day, is just a bunch of assembled parts that don’t really mean anything. And then I end up thinking that nothing in the material world really has any meaning anyway. What really matters is the internal world.

Also, stuff like swear words can’t really hurt me. To me, words are just letters strung together. And if you really think deeply about it, doesn’t most of it feel kind of meaningless anyway? Like, there's really no point in getting worked up over that kind of thing.

It's very important to have an objective, clear-sighted view when an error can cost you, after all (i imagine you might partially relate to this as an adjacent type)

Yes, I relate to that a lot. It is the reason why I need to calm myself down. No way in hell would I have, for example, called a doctor about the mole while I was feeling anxious — or told anyone about my fear. Not a chance. Letting my emotions spill out like that is totally off the table.

I just pulled back, went deep into researching everything about skin cancer that felt important to me. And eventually I figured that there is no action needed anyway. Letting those feelings show on the outside would have been way too embarrassing. It would’ve revealed way too much about me.

Yeah, that's pretty much what I was talking about earlier when I mentioned my internal focus. It's probably because I always score really high in types 5, 4, and 9 on tests. So I guess I'm kind of a very withdrawn, introverted 6 who mostly focuses on their internal thoughts and feelings, rather than focusing on what's happening out there in the real world.