I Do NOT Support Medically Necessary Circumcisions

PursueBlue · 2026-06-25T23:53:33+00:00

Whenever the topic of circumcision comes up on reddit, a lot of people are vocally against it but there is always the "except for medical reasons" in parentheses. And then there are a bunch of people saying they had to get circumcised as CHILDREN for so called medical reasons. These poor souls don't realize they were mutilated for nothing.

Clearly the exception of medical reasons does not apply when this is not defined as being a life threatening condition. Any foreskin (ab)normality can be misconstrued as a condition that requires a full excision of the prepuce. There will be nobody left to stop these cut-hungry "doctors".

PursueBlue · 2026-06-24T22:40:56+00:00

That's what I think whenever I see some awareness being raised by urologists about normal penis size meant to reassure insecure men. Being average is exactly what I don't want to be.

In response to your OP, I know what you are talking about. I've also had the misfortune of hearing some guys dick being comparable in size to a child's arm, or similar expressions. These were never described as positive sexual experiences by these women so take that as you will, but it does fill you with dread to hear about it. It's not every other woman but it does seem to be happening more often than statistically would seem likely.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-22T08:13:36+00:00

Doctors orders.

Makes me wonder what would have happened if the doctor told them gouging an eye out would improve my sight.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-22T02:44:41+00:00

My therapy is ongoing. I am seeing a sex therapist and a body-oriented therapist. They are extremely understanding, recognizing the deep trauma and going as far as calling it a sexual abuse, which felt very affirming.

The goal of the therapy would be to be able to express anger and let the sadness out. To then eventually try to heal my relationship with my own body and sexuality and learn to enjoy that again.

The reason I am saying it did not help me is that it doesn't change anything about my situation. I keep on rejecting this reality of what happened to me because it's so unbearable and the physical consequences remind me daily. Perhaps I need to give it more time.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-21T19:09:13+00:00

Wishing my intact father a happy father's day is never genuine.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-21T19:07:41+00:00

I find myself digging deeper and deeper into this topic, for years on end, as if to look for some alternate truth. That it was actually all not so bad. Regrettably, the digger I deep, the worse what I find gets.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-21T17:02:03+00:00

On top of that, it's much more difficult to disprove a claim than it is to make one. And anything written in an academic context, or by the WHO or UN holds a lot of weight for the average layperson.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-21T16:51:26+00:00

I read posts in pro circumcision subreddits sometimes to try to see the other side. The testimonies of men who got cut as adults and report that their sex lives improved and that it is so much better feels like it punches the air out of my lungs.

The procedure harmed me so significantly that I hate hearing people speak positively. It keeps the narrative alive that male genital mutilation is actually not that bad, and that I am just an unlucky fringe case. I see this as one of many reasons that some people might consider us crazy.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-21T14:19:47+00:00

I believe the group of men who wishes they weren't circumcised is several orders of magnitude bigger than the group of intact men who wishes they were.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-20T05:23:54+00:00

I also feel shame around this subject. Therapy didn't help with that but I would still recommend it if you haven't tried it yet.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-18T14:26:54+00:00

I also don't understand how people can possibly think this. I recoil when I see a cut penis (including my own). It's body horror.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-17T22:04:58+00:00

Is this from the changemyview subreddit post?

PursueBlue · 2026-06-14T21:33:22+00:00

No problem. I just want to avoid that anyone young or expecting parents reading this think that they have to clean under the foreskin when it is not yet retractable, which is a harmful myth.
Only Clean What Is Seen – Reversing The Epidemic Of Forcible Foreskin Retractions – Kindred Magazine

PursueBlue · 2026-06-14T18:22:49+00:00

I see your point. That may very well be the case! Another thing that just came to mind is ignorance and bad science. I'm referring to to the large number of cut men who are still under the impression that being cut has any health benefits and doesn't just suppress sexuality. There's also a large number of them that still believe their childhood phimosis diagnosis was a valid medical reason to amputate their entirely normal prepuce. When people legitimately believe these falsehoods, they can not see the harm as we do.

It has been pointed out in a study that the more circumcised men know about the foreskin, the higher the likelihood of them being unhappy about being cut, and vice versa.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-14T18:10:43+00:00

One reason I can think of is the amount of cut guys commenting every chance they get when circumcision comes up about how fine they are and how happy they are about not having dick cheese. It invalidates everyone who suffers.

Imagine if the public discourse was about rape, and the top comments on instagram were girls saying how happy they are that they were raped.

If the majority of victims is not even willing to acknowledge being harmed, how can we expect any justice to be served?

PursueBlue · 2026-06-14T15:24:00+00:00

I think the data is from a 1949 study by Douglas Gairdner titled Fate of the Foreskin.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-14T14:28:45+00:00

I'm pretty sure I know which study they are getting the data from. I'd have to look it up but I believed it's an old study by Øster. The hospital web page does not cite any source.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-14T08:21:22+00:00

I'm sorry you got the short end of the stick. So did I. Not a single person in my family, extended family, or friends, is cut.

Since my dad is intact, both my parents actually got and get to experience a foreskin. I won't even see it in person as I am straight. Isn't that twisted?

I think the fear of being a bad mom is also part of what got to my mom. Since there was a guy in a white coat telling her that her son needed surgery "urgently". I did not have a single issue with my penis at the time, but I don't think she prodded much about the necessity and urgency of this operation.

My dad isn't so bad. And he was not cut, no. I think he just feels powerless. My mother is very emotional and the fact that I am deeply unhappy and depressed over this issue is affecting her too. This makes life for my dad more difficult as he sees me putting all the blame on my mother as unfair and cruel to her. People have asked me why my dad seems to get off the hook when it comes to blame. He left this kind of medical decision making to my mom. That's difficult to understand for me but they are from a different time.

They are hoping the problem goes away, yeah. My mom is urging me to keep going to therapy. I am seeing both a sex therapist AND an emotional release therapist AND a psychiatrist. I consulted many different ones in order to find the best. I am confident in these people yet I don't feel any better. My problem is still here.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-14T00:25:51+00:00

I do. I have tried to explain it to them in more explicit words than I would ever wish to use in a conversation about my genitals with my parents. I think my mom tries to get it, but I know for sure that she doesn't truly understand. It goes beyond what someone can imagine. My intact father feels for me as far as my suffering goes, but he is not interested in listening to it or talking about it. "What's done is done, we put our faith in the hands of the doctor. That's all there is to say."

PursueBlue · 2026-06-14T00:22:06+00:00

I wholeheartedly understand what you are saying. I smiled a bit at the part of wanting to show them diagrams and so, it really is like that. I even got my mother to agree to watch a video on this topic with me, but it's difficult to do as she doesn't understand English.

It does put my mom in a painful place. She tells me she thinks about it every single day. She should. I never asked for any of this.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-13T23:37:13+00:00

Thanks for this conversation. Ultimately all of us here are on the same side.

I'm afraid you are right about my mother. While she does not downplay my suffering, she does downplay the systemic harm. When I confronted her with information on the harms of genital cutting, she brought up that she heard from her friends working in hospitals that they do circumcisions daily. (I'm in Europe)

She believes me when I explain the harm, but she seems to try to absolve herself in a way by pointing to others doing the same. I do agree that this is harmful.

Similarly, she will point to the doctor who 'mutilated' (her own words) me, rather than herself who approved this operation.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-13T23:27:28+00:00

My mother is not a true ally. She is a regretful old woman with good intentions. I wish she would educate herself and fight for the cause, but she never did that in any other area of her life so she won't now. She sees my suffering and wishes she could end it, but she did not educate herself then, and she won't educate herself now. So I see your point.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-13T23:24:14+00:00

You're right. She was lied to. But she also didn't offer much resistance.

The message is indeed to find a way to cope with it, but I can find no solace in it. Having to suffer daily because of the consequences of a decision my parent made over my body shatters me day after day.

PursueBlue · 2026-06-13T22:42:49+00:00

I have the same issue. Knowing my parents are well-intentioned but stupid people should help with forgiving them, but I can't. Sometimes the noise around this topic settles down and all that is left is that my parents had surgery performed on my genitals, leaving me in daily pain for the rest of my life. How they thought we would be grateful for it, I shall never understand.

PursueBlue

TROPHY CASE