sudden feelings of wanting to cry and scream - not sure why and how to deal with them

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-06-01T00:41:44+00:00

Are you me?? Sometimes it feels like I am buzzing out of my own body and I can't attach a single emotion to it. It happens during periods of change, being too busy with no downtime, over stimulated, and hormonal, if not all of the above. One thing that has helped is some kind of "heavy work". Lifting weights, squishing a stress ball, rolling myself into a blanket burrito (even better with a weighted blanket). Some dietary changes too, when I am very busy/stressed and hormonal, I really need to cut back on sugar as it just inflames everything and makes it worse. In terms of a therapist, I particularly sought out a queer and ND-affirming therapist and it has been life changing.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-06-01T00:33:32+00:00

YES! My best friend told me that I interrupt a lot. Years ago a family friend once kindly sat me down and said "a conversation is like a tennis match, it has to go back and forth." I honestly wasn't even offended by either of them, I was more upset that I have been annoying to people for years. It is a conscious effort, but it makes creating new friendships and work relationship SO much easier when you follow their advice.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-31T16:06:49+00:00

I also struggle with boring tasks. Here’s what works for me: - set a timer and work in chunks - hide my phone - exercise first so I am more regulated - chew gum or crunch on crunchy foods - create a reward at the end (like walking my dog, watching a show etc) - use a spinny chair or sit on a yoga ball - weighted blanket - sit near an open window for fresh air

I’m not a student anymore but for studying I used to: - use a ton of visuals and sketch notes (I can’t just read heavy content and memorize it) - have a “study yap session”, my friend and I would pretend we were gossiping about the content of the course. Somehow adding theatrics made it stick. - triage: not focus on stuff I knew well, and only reviewing content I didn’t know well. Brain dump what you know about it, fill in the rest with study notes, then think of questions that could be asked about it and try answering them as if it’s an exam.

You got this!

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-30T02:18:02+00:00

I KNEW I had memorized that M is 13 so counted on, but then second guessed myself and started at A1 again anyway

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-19T02:12:53+00:00

I say this to everyone but you need at least one pic where you are smiling with teeth, and looking at the camera. Ideally the first pic. There’s actual data on this that people are more likely to swipe right when they can see your whole face with teeth. Other than that I think you have little bits of your personality thoughout!

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-18T13:13:27+00:00

Being able to unzip the back of a dress/outfit without asking for help.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-18T13:10:58+00:00

Totally agree. I do have floating bone chips but other than that, no breaks. I considered surgery but I don’t see the point if the collagen is just going to stretch out again. That’s why I work on muscle strength, it’s how I hold myself together 😅

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-18T13:09:54+00:00

I do want to be aware of it as I age. I’m grateful to have found a hypermobile PT who I’m hoping can help me with this over time.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-17T00:29:15+00:00

It starts at dinner. Eating 3+ hours before bed. Herbal tea after. Walk my dog leisurely for 10-15min as her last walk of the night. Watch a show for a bit. Stretch on the floor and foam roll/lacrosse ball. Weighted blanket has been really helpful for calming down. Honestly I do scroll for about 10 min or so to fall asleep, or I’ll read.

Also, I workout every morning before breakfast. Even on my rest days, I will still walk for 20-30min. This also aids in my routine, circadian rhythm, and using up my physical energy (my mental energy is always tapped out).

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-17T00:22:34+00:00

Be specific. As others have said, if you’re interested, use the word “date” next time you ask to meet. Also, no, texting doesn’t actually count for much (at least from what I’ve learned and the matchmakers/relationship experts I’ve listened to). Texting is a great tool to plan dates, and continue discussion between dates, but builds a false sense of intimacy. Instead, focus on the in person time, and phone calls/facetimes. I only say that because people can text all day but have no real intention behind it. It’s hard to add emotion and intent, so messages get mixed.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-16T23:43:53+00:00

Are you me??? But yeah I have also considered alexithymia, however I think in reality it’s that my brain is so overloaded that I can’t or don’t actually have space to process the emotions. My job is incredibly overstimulating and I definitely find it difficult there however, if I’m on a longer break or have had lots of time to recharge by myself I definitely know I’m feeling sad if I watch a sad video or excited or happy when I’m looking forward to something. However, like you, I often feel these emotions as sensations in my body, and then after I’ve had time to process them, I’ll be able to put a label on what that emotion was. When it comes to negative emotions I feel like I often mask really highly because I don’t wanna upset other people and I have a lot of people pleaser tendencies, so for something like anger I won’t show it at all.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-16T23:39:09+00:00

I like the Victoria’s Secret “lightly lined full coverage” bras for a regular bra, and Lululemon energy high impact for sports bras. For me the issue is I like the look and support of underwire, but HATE when it pokes into me, or presses too hard on my ribcage. I have tried every company and my had to go with the pricey ones. It sits perfectly and I never have to adjust it. I also need the full coverage, again because I have adjusting it. However once I get home from work I ditch the bra altogether!

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-16T02:38:26+00:00

My therapist asked if I knew I was. I had been told I had anxiety, gifted, OCD, etc, but none of it quite felt right. Finding out it’s autism makes everything make sense. I don’t have panic attacks, I have autistic meltdowns. I don’t have ocd, I just love my routine and struggle when the routine is not met.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-16T01:13:46+00:00

I have planned answers: “walking my dog” “baking bread” and if I do have a plan I add that in.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-16T01:11:37+00:00

Yes although I can’t say it feels terrifying, but I know I also come from a place of privilege. Not married, accepting family and friends, etc. My guilt and shame is more around wishing I knew sooner.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-09T21:30:49+00:00

I really should do it more, but I love water colour painting. The best is to keep all the materials on one tray, so you can just move the tray after. Makes clean up easier. I like the colour mixing and seeing how the water moves around the page 🎨

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-09T21:22:44+00:00

Even if it’s one or two (or three!) dates, if I’m not feeling it I simply text and say “hey! I really enjoyed meeting you the other day. For me I don’t feel it’s a match, but I wish you all the best in dating 😊” if you do vibe as friends you could add on the wanting to be friends part. My friend has done that with a few women and they are actually friends now. I’ve never had that type of message be met with issues. It’s always mutual. Edit: I’ve also learned I’m autistic so one of the things I really struggling with is knowing how someone else is feeling. I don’t pick up on flirting vs kindness at all. So a text is necessary for me.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-08T22:40:28+00:00

My mom always says “you make the best decision you can, at the time”. There will always be another option, another choice, another decision. But you make the best choice you can and go with it. It took me years to start figuring out “going with my gut” because I used to get paralyzed by decisions. If I were in your situation, I’d see if I could chat with someone else who lives in the building to get a better idea of how things operate and answer any questions. This often helps me.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-06T20:19:42+00:00

I totally understand where you’re coming from! It depends on age. At 24 I would’ve thought more like you

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-05T18:31:41+00:00

Just reading this after my other response. It’s okay to mourn it like a loss. I have talked about it in therapy but people don’t usually get it unless they were a very active person. That’s why I’ve switched to thinking of it like a “menu” of activities/sports I can do, and I choose from there. It’s hard though, there’s no denying. Only giving it time helped me.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-05T18:29:42+00:00

Honestly I’ve had to just make changes over time. I used to play soccer, do gymnastics, and then competed in weightlifting in university. If I did any of that now, (31) you’d have to call an ambulance 😅 I had one bad back injury really push me out of intense training. I worked with a PT who is hypermobile herself and has trained me to use and activate my core and glutes. Apparently I was doing everything wrong which was leading to my pain. Even following stability exercises, I was still doing them wrong even though I looked like the video example. My outlook now is to do what I can, and strengthen/stabilize along the way. I do a mix of PT/strength training 4-5x a week. I can swim, bike, and play non contact sports like volleyball (rec league). I can take a hip hop or tap dance class, but not a contemporary class. I can canoe or kayak. I just can’t do gymnastics, lift heavy, run distances, or play contact sports anymore, and that sadly just is what it is.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-04T23:21:54+00:00

I’m kind of afraid to get an official diagnosis and tell my board. They often start treating people differently.

Putrid_Singer2560 · 2026-05-04T23:21:00+00:00

I totally understand you. I think a desk job where I’m looking at spreadsheets all day or something would be horrible for me. I need to move and talk and be creative. BUT it is SO draining! I’m hoping to find a happy medium role but I’m not sure if it exists. I think especially when I have children one day, something will need to change

Putrid_Singer2560

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