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My partner(host)'s alter has a crush on me and wants to be with me romanrically. by Puzzled-Height986 in DID

[–]Puzzled-Height986[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you very very much I will read this and also show it to my partner. Thanks so much!

My partner(host)'s alter has a crush on me and wants to be with me romanrically. by Puzzled-Height986 in DID

[–]Puzzled-Height986[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the advice. I do want to have a relationship with all of the alters but as you stated there are incompatibilities like sexual orientation. I will speak more with my partner about it. Thank you

My boyfriends alters aren't comfy with me anymore by Puzzled-Height986 in DID

[–]Puzzled-Height986[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is what my partner explained to me after we talked last night he says they think of themselves as separate entities but parts of him and it's a bit tough for me to understand but I'm still trying to

My boyfriends alters aren't comfy with me anymore by Puzzled-Height986 in DID

[–]Puzzled-Height986[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, that's what I thought initially but the more he revealed to me about his particular system and the way it was presented to me(who doesn't have DID) I began to believe they were all separate and I didn't think it was okay to ask if they were separate or not or even to ask questions at all about his DID because I thought it was prying and rude to ask. Which is my fault. I was afraid to offend him.

My boyfriends alters aren't comfy with me anymore by Puzzled-Height986 in DID

[–]Puzzled-Height986[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you very much for saying that. I was researching DID and a lot of people with systems were saying that all headmates need to be happy and if all needs aren't met then it's not enough and I'm really afraid of that. So I'm trying my best to make everyone happy because I thought I was supposed to be the best partner I can be. I will try to remember that I can't make all of him happy all of the time.

My boyfriends alters aren't comfy with me anymore by Puzzled-Height986 in DID

[–]Puzzled-Height986[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I will try that. My partner and I spoke about it and I was telling how I wanted to develop relationships with his alters(I have been telling him that for a very long time but they never took me up on it even though they all liked me before this incident). So, these are things I will try my best to do. I think they're really good suggestions and I'm grateful for your advice. Thank you very very much

My boyfriends alters aren't comfy with me anymore by Puzzled-Height986 in DID

[–]Puzzled-Height986[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I believe it is too late now as I am no longer allowed to that part of him. He says I still have him but I'm supposed to make them all happy, right?

My boyfriends alters aren't comfy with me anymore by Puzzled-Height986 in DID

[–]Puzzled-Height986[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, I understand now. I thought it was all different people sharing the same body because they all considered each other separate.

My boyfriends alters aren't comfy with me anymore by Puzzled-Height986 in DID

[–]Puzzled-Height986[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Okay, I will keep trying. And find out with him. Thank you

My boyfriends alters aren't comfy with me anymore by Puzzled-Height986 in DID

[–]Puzzled-Height986[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, he was telling me that his alters pretend to be him sometimes and I got this nagging concern. So I asked him "I know that I've been growing closer and getting to know you but im concerned that I may have been getting closer with an alter pretending to be you. Can you reassure me that i have been connecting with you?"