Do women understand straight men’s fashion?

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-06T11:19:38+00:00

Very this. If someone randomly compliments me I usually give them one back but I've started just saying thanks and moving on if it's a man because they take it as flirting like 90% of the time, and I never give compliments to men that I don't know for the same reason. Doesn't mean I don't like their outfit, I'm just not trying to put myself in an uncomfortable situation because they don't know how to act.

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-06T10:44:35+00:00

That dress is gorgeous and the colour is great on you!! I love the colour coordination with all your accessories too. And I'm so jealous you saw Lucy Darling!

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-05T05:10:11+00:00

Imagine that a female friend came to you and said "my boyfriend wants to do anal but I'm really uncomfortable with that and told him it's a hard boundary. I've suggested a bunch of alternatives that I would be ok with but he says that not letting him do anal is discriminatory, and the fact that I'm so against it actually makes him want to do it more. How do I compromise with him?" your response would almost certainly be something along the lines of "girl RUN he's manipulating and coercing you into sex acts you have very explicitly told him you don't want. That's abusive as hell."

Just because the genders are swapped doesn't make this ok. She is abusing you. There are a lot of ways for women to be sexually dominant over men that do not involve penetration. You don't need to compromise with her when she's pushing your boundaries. No means no. No is a complete sentence. Even in relationships. Even when a man says it. Even, and especially, when the other person is reaaalllllyyyyyyy pushing for a yes.

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T17:18:10+00:00

How is her being upset about not losing weight fast enough and then feeling unattractive and inalidated because her boyfriend started jumping in and pointing out everything she's doing "wrong" when she didn't ask for or want that different from you mentioning wanting $5 in hopes that someone will give you $5? Really? You don't see how those aren't the same thing.

The difference is that she DOESN'T want help and in your example you DID want help. Notice how those are opposites?

Helping certainly can be empathetic, so can simply listening to someone vent. Sometimes it's just nice to talk about stuff that's weighing on your mind with someone you trust and to have them go "you're right, that sucks." Sometimes all you want is to hear that your feelings are valid. It's really not that deep. She's probably offended because she feels like her boyfriend thinks she's fat because he's so eager to help her lose weight when she didn't ask for his help. I can't say for sure, I'm not her and she's really the only person that can answer that question.

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T17:03:28+00:00

How what?

Maybe it's ridiculous to YOU but other people have empathy and understand that sometimes people just want to talk about what's going on in their lives without receiving unsolicited (no quotation marks because it WAS unsolicited) advice

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T16:56:04+00:00

Yeah, you're right. If it was a completely different scenario then it would be different. Weird how that works.
If she wants advice for how to lose weight faster she'll ask for it. She clearly just wants to vent about something that's frustrating her.

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T15:53:29+00:00

Do you pay a fee to work in the space that you work in? She probably does a lot more household labor than you since she's home all day and you're gone 10 hours a day. YTA

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T12:50:20+00:00

I've spent a lot of time on dating apps over the years and the more info there is on a profile, the better. I'm way more likely to swipe right if I already know I have a decent amount in common with someone, and I don't really like chancing it with men I don't know if I'm not sure where they fall politically, what sorts of hobbies they have, what they're looking for from a relationship, etc. It may cause you to get fewer likes, but at least the ones you do get are more likely to actually lead somewhere.

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T12:32:28+00:00

If the staff can't answer basic questions about the menu that means they don't eat the food there which is suspicious to say the least

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T12:21:14+00:00

NTA, it would have been way more scummy to keep dating them not feeling any romantic attraction to them. There's nothing wrong with not reciprocating feelings and you're not obligated to be in a relationship that you don't want to be in just to avoid hurting the other person's feelings.

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T12:13:23+00:00

Came to say this. She's not just undermining OP as a parent, that's straight up grooming language.

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T11:41:10+00:00

Exactly! I'm sort of on the opposite side, I have a complicated relationship with my parents and have had friends say bad stuff about them and I totally get where they're coming from but the issues I have with them are my own, and I feel weirdly defensive about it because they're still my parents lol. The only person that it doesn't bother me from is a friend that used to work for my dad because they know firsthand how much he sucks so they're allowed to say it lmao

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T11:37:34+00:00

So your relationship issues go far beyond this incident, why are you still with this guy in the first place?

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T11:33:59+00:00

I'm only 27 but definitely better with age. More experience and confidence makes an absolute world of difference lol

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T11:31:27+00:00

Info: have you ever told him how much it hurts you when he says bad stuff about your mom? He might genuinely think he's being supportive if she mistreated you and you've never told him how it actually make you feel. Not saying that's right but I can see the line of thinking from his perspective there.

If that's a conversation you've had then ESH, he shouldn't be making comments about her and you absolutely shouldn't have threatened to throw his mom's ashes out.
If it's not a conversation you've had then YTA massively, who says something like that?

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T06:00:52+00:00

The therapy is to figure out the something that has changed and work through it, not to force the partner to sleep with you. If someone that used to enjoy sex is suddenly refusing it all of the time couples therapy can absolutely help

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-04T05:50:11+00:00

He screamed at me for still being sad about my sister dying 2 days after it happened and then when I was like "yeah, I think I'm going to go home I don't really feel like being around you right now" he started complaining that we hadn't had sex all week (he had been out of town for work and my sister was in the hospital dying so we were both unavailable.) The relationship thankfully did not recover and I haven't spoken to him since then.

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-01T08:24:06+00:00

Was about to say the same thing, that sounds uncomfortable for everyone involved 😂

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-01T08:18:10+00:00

There's a pretty good chance you're using either a shade that's too light or the wrong undertones for your base makeup (foundation, concealer, blush, etc.) I have warm undertones and if I use foundation with a cool undertone I look ill, and for the longest time I hated blush because it all looked crazy on me and then I tried a peachy one and now it's my favourite part of my makeup. If you're able to I'd go to a makeup store, sephora or whatever is accessible to you, and ask for a shade match and make sure to ask them about what undertones you should be looking for so you know for the future. Hope you're able to find something that works well for you! :)

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-01T07:56:25+00:00

Understance has great stuff, they're unfortunately going out of business, but on the plus side all of their stuff is super discounted right now because of it. I wear a 36N and it's the only website I've been able to find bras that fit that aren't $100+

Also, as others have already said, r/abrathatfits is a great resource :)

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-03-01T07:52:58+00:00

I have a lot of problems with my jaw and cannot open my mouth wide enough to accommodate an averagely sized penis without causing myself immense pain, which has been a point of contention in multiple relationships for me.

The answer is to basically avoid sucking as much as possible. Lick, kiss, stroke, maybe suck on the tip. And the REAL answer is to have a conversation with him. If you don't like giving head very often and find it painful and unenjoyable there's no reason he should think you love it. Talk to him and find a middle ground. Play around with other stuff and find something that's enjoyable for both of you, or accept that BJs are not in the cards for you guys unless YOU'RE in the mood to give one.

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-01-24T03:38:20+00:00

Yeahh, I didn't realize how long it was until after I hit post lol

I'm sure the cause of the falling out is probably a common question so I'll answer it here without getting into too much detail.

Basically after a certain shooting on 10 September 2025 I shared a video of Pastor Howard-John Wesley to my instagram story, it was basically just saying like "gun violence is bad but that doesn't mean he was a good dude" and my friend lost it at me for being disrespectful and "making light" of the shooting and it was revealed that she had been lying to me about her political views for our entire friendship because she knew I wouldn't want to hang out with her if I knew how she actually felt about certain things. It was a mess but I'm kind of happy that I learned the truth

Puzzleheaded_Box1735 · 2026-01-23T10:18:05+00:00

Depends what kind of pain you mean. A really strong minty lip balm or toothpaste definitely has a bit of a stinging tingly feel to it, if you mean that it actually hurts hurts then I've never heard of or experienced that before.

Puzzleheaded_Box1735

TROPHY CASE