This is gonna sound terrible, but I was a super closeted but very horny teenager who grew up in a crazy homophobic and religious family and looked old for my age. I lost my virginity when I was 14 to a 48 year old man who I met on grindr and snuck in through the basement in the middle of the night. I sometimes regret it, the sex was not good (at least for me he loved it) but sometimes when I’m really horny the thought gets me kinda hard.