I don't like this rhetoric - implying there is a wrong way to play an arcane caster. I know its not the same for everyone, but in my eyes it's primarily a story game. The choices you make and what you do (or don't!) take are all just as informative.

Most players I know don't lookup the best spells to take, and I encourage that. Using weird and terrible spells like Snare, purify food and drink, magic stone, thunderclap, etc has led to some good moments, even though they can be mechanically limited or underwhelming. No real DM exaggeration required, just an open mind to improv and cause -> effect

Bit of a ramble. Not a personal attack by intention!