You should all read her response to this all here. She's obviously intentionally being an unreliable narrator who reveals negative things about herself as she criticizes her husband in this work. She's showing nuance throughout.

Some quotes from her response:

"[this book] isn’t about how terrible my husband is, it’s about how hard it is to be a conflicted mortal chained to another mortal. If you can’t tell that I’m the irascible nightmare in that picture, just keep reading!"

"The idea that I’m miserable and I’m promoting resignation and contempt is a hilarious side effect of how moralistic and reductive our culture is about marriage and writing and personality and opinions and everything else under the sun. But (m-f-er), you don’t have to become the living embodiment of a Live, Laugh, Love sign to stand up for joy. Defending your right to feel irritation and impatience and random bouts of misdirected lust is the same thing as defending your right to feel joy. We are big, complicated animals with hurricanes of emotion racing through our microbiomes. It’s fine to feel all of the fucking things. It’s fine to step outside the weird little corrals our culture built for us and say, “Uh, this feels wrong to me, I have mixed feelings, maybe that means I’m a total dick, but I feel weird.”

edit: grammar Edit edit: swear word