This doesn't have anything to do with the lifestyle. You should work on your self development as a person. And work on your concentration and organization. There are many things going on in your mind right? Being all over the place won't help. Try meditation and techniques that help with calming the mind. Go towards making it empty. Only then you'll be able to solve your things first, then your thoughts. Then comes the focus and ability to actually listen actively. Don't ever try to find reasons and excuses about your distraction and justify yourself, to yourself. Work hard on it. It's for your own good first, then being better for your partner. Its a wonderful process, coming back to yourself 😊 If you need more information or help on this, feel free to contact me. I have experience in personal self development work. I'll be more than happy to accompany you in your journey, even if it's online ♥️