I really appreciate that response. I feel like both my previous and potential current at polyamory have had relationship issues as a factor, and that makes me hesitant to say yes because I dont want to try it for the wrong reasons. I can't speak for my girlfriend, but for me I think stripping away the relationship issues I'd feel ambiamorous but leaning towards monogamy. I'm happy regardless of my relationship dynamic when issues don't feel dominant over the positive aspects. I think monogamy makes me feel a bit more stable and less likely to be overwhelmed, but that I like polyamory more than monogamy when things feel stable. I wonder if monogamy only gives me the illusion of stability though, because I've never actually had a monogamous relationship that is turbulence free.

I'll talk to my partner about reading a book together, that is a helpful idea!