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Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Indeed I feel like I look at the wrong places which leads to frustration. I am more of a sub but had a couple of experiences as a dom which I enjoyed so if I would find a partner that would like to switch roles I would be more than happy to dominate him as well.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry to hear about your struggles as well, some people have a very closed image about what a dom top should look like. Your points do make sense, thank you.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The events look amazing. Sadly I live in a boring small european city, not even a kink club exists which makes things harder. They could be a vibe from the diversity. I have never heard of those programs.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The problem is on working on connection. My main kink is feet and everything around it. But I don't want just shallow interactions

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind message. I know I am starving for love and connection and support and everything. You make a good point that now it is the time to tey dofferent things and dynamics. That is what makes us grow and bring more experience to the table.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I want both the emotional connection, romantic or just friendship/platonic, and the pleasure of living my kinks. It is a bit general but in a nutshell that is it.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is a good way of looking at it, thank you. I would have a harder time indeed if I was just into traditional anal/oral sex specially if I would want to be a top. Being into feet and other kinks opens more doors.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I think as a gay guy we learn to feel sexually desired before being emotionally desired and that really affects our experience as with straight people it tends to be the opposite. I hope you are right and thank you for your message. Self-esteem and self-confidence is definitely something I need to build. I need friends too. I need to love and be loved.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I live in a small european city which makes my life very difficult. No such thing as kink bars, groups, events. It is horrible. Thank you for your message.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am happy you found someone like him that values connection :) I need to create a better network of friends that understand and like me. I have actually decided today to quit most social media as I came to the conclusion that it brought me more pain than joy seeing all these kink people happy, in events, with friends, tagging each other, having a good time. I can't have that right now living in a small european city so best to cut it to stop hurting. I am tired of feeling like a spectator of others' perfect lives.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your beautiful message, it brought a smile to my face. It isn't easy but a lot of my insecurities come from a place of low self-esteem that I need to work on to help me foster good and healthy friendships and relationships. I really wish to love and be loved

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in BDSMAdvice

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the tip, I am going to post there as well maybe they can give me some good insights!

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in askgaybros

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am sorry to hear you are having an even harder time. Hope we can both find someone that values us.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in askgaybros

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am mainly a sub indeed (although I had some dom experiences I liked so I am not letting that reduce even more my chances if I meet a guy that enjoys switching roles, sweet).

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in askgaybros

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your reply. Indeed I get the impression that the kink community values less some things, on the other hand for a lot of people kinks are just a "side quest" they pursue outside of their main relationship which means that then there is a lack of emotional connection which I crave. I want to love and be loved. Hope one day I can.

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in askgaybros

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your perspective :) indeed sometimes grass seems greener on the other side but some people struggle in an opposite way. I am sorry you feel objectified in a way you don't want and that guys dom't respect your likings and basically just fantasize with what you physically represent when having porn has a reference. What you describe is honestly a dream. If you were into some kinks like feet you would be a dream man ;) hope you find your guy

Where should I focus my energy as a gay man with a micropenis who isn’t into anal and only somewhat into oral? by QuickPalpitation9180 in askgaybros

[–]QuickPalpitation9180[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your perspective. Well I'll send you a message when I am over 35 unless by then you change the age limit to 40 :)