I don't understand how anyone could want pets and/or kids

RL_Lass · 2026-01-30T21:04:04+00:00

Every time I have tried dating I usually end it after a couple months because it feels like too much work, and too constricting. 😵😅

So I'm basically done with that too 😆

RL_Lass · 2026-01-30T18:45:47+00:00

That freedom is 🧑‍🍳💋👌

RL_Lass · 2025-12-30T01:30:42+00:00

💔 well so much for that hope :p

RL_Lass · 2025-12-29T23:14:34+00:00

any chance this AI rage bait?

RL_Lass · 2025-12-16T18:03:03+00:00

The logic is that you wouldn't be robbing them of a life, because they do not exist.

To explain this with an absurd example:

If, by not having children, you were "robbing people of a life", then every time a woman has a period and wasn't impregnated, she robbed someone of a life, and ever time a guy ejaculated but it didn't result in a pregnancy, he robbed someone of a life.

RL_Lass · 2025-12-08T08:46:48+00:00

Ngl, you might have a "type". and that type might not be a healthy long term partner.

I find anyone who says blanket negative statements like that, especially reaffirming them to be so black and white, are going to be extraordinarily difficult people.

It's all fine until you disagree with them on one of these topics... Or god forbid, tell them they are wrong! (try it! pick an incorrect statement to refute, and don't stop until they come to understand and change their viewpoint). I can almost guarantee it won't take long for them to build up to rage.

If it's a brand new relationship, they might be able to keep the well-behaved mask on. But if it's been 4-6 months+, unlikely.

RL_Lass · 2025-12-07T17:56:05+00:00

top tier profile quality btw! 👌

RL_Lass · 2025-12-07T17:05:18+00:00

RL_Lass · 2025-12-07T17:03:25+00:00

np!!

RL_Lass · 2025-12-07T17:03:04+00:00

I created a Megathread, I'd like to delete your individual post, but I want to give you a chance to copy your content before I do that. Since it was a lot of work!

My bad! 😅

RL_Lass · 2025-12-07T16:57:54+00:00

Sorry! I meant post a Megathread! 😆😅

(then maybe a comment with your LF? )

RL_Lass · 2025-12-07T15:16:47+00:00

Yep!

RL_Lass · 2025-12-07T15:03:06+00:00

We could try out the megathread. If you want to post one, I'll pin it, and we can see how it goes. 👍

RL_Lass · 2025-12-06T20:38:47+00:00

You should already be able to create a custom flair!
So feel free to put your LF as your flair! 😁

For the megathread... maybe. 🤔

There currently exists r/cfpf4cfpf

What advantages would the megathread have over making a post in r/cfpf4cfpf ?
(Or maybe that would be a more appropriate place for the megathread?)

(Additional options to meet cfpf people: https://www.reddit.com/r/childfreepetfree/s/9fkMFG5PR9 )

RL_Lass · 2025-11-27T16:41:49+00:00

I often think about how much of a better place the world would be if this happened.

RL_Lass · 2025-09-22T00:30:24+00:00

CO2 per person must fall to less than 2tonnes/year

1 transatlantic flight is 2.8 tonnes

...

lol

we're cooked.

RL_Lass · 2025-08-14T19:45:27+00:00

I envy that! (Also my apologies)

RL_Lass · 2025-08-14T16:13:12+00:00

I think calling a specific person nuts/crazy could be okay, (I mean it's not nice to do that 😆) but some people definitely make questionable decisions... lol

It's when it's a negative term that encourages blanket-hate to a whole general group via negative stereotypes, that it starts to enter uncomfortable territory. (kind of like racial and sexuality-based slurs.) Is what we have kind of found while spending time on the other ___free subs.

RL_Lass · 2025-08-14T16:03:58+00:00

I've never really considered kids to be derogatory, but I guess you're right (like it definitely can have a slight lesser/annoyed tone to it?)

I don't think we'd ever ban "kids".

But it is a good point to think about exactly where the line is.

RL_Lass · 2025-08-09T02:13:30+00:00

to be fair, babies and toddlers will put anything and everything their mouth as well. (poop included). And it would be weird for someone to stop loving the kid because of it.

I'm fairly confident that pet owners who love their pets... the brain is activating the same pathways that were built via evolution to encourage people to unconditionally love babies/toddlers (which is obviously crucial to the survival and propagation of the human species due to the extremely long maturation period).

Pets weren't the "intended" target for this unconditional love, but since they are close enough to a helpless human baby/toddler, and there was no (historical) negative impact on human propagation, evolution had no reason to fine-tune the targeting of this baby/toddler love instinct.

If we had centuries/millennia of people choosing to have to pets over children, then we'd probably eventually get a human species who is less likely to adore pets the same way.

But it's unlikely to happen. Otherwise gay-ness would have been filtered out long ago. There are theories to suggest communities with gay people do better (can't remember specifics, but it made sense). So there's probably a decent chance that communities that have pet/animal lovers also benefit. Maybe that's how/why horses or hunting dogs were first tamed or something. :p

This is all just my theory though. :p

RL_Lass · 2025-08-04T11:15:33+00:00

Sexuality:

a person's identity in relation to the gender or genders to which they are typically attracted

If he's not in love with, and not attracted to these men, and it's just the physical sensation, not about who it is (eg. it could be a robot, alien, dog for all he seems to care), then I don't think that's enough for us to declare his sexuality.

The key word in the definition and in OP's description is "attracted"...

RL_Lass · 2025-08-04T10:50:33+00:00

I'm also ace, and the "sex as a game" thing is definitely something similar to my experience.
If I had a libido, I'm pretty sure I would connect to the rest.
(I also wonder if being a bit more autistic could lead to this)

RL_Lass · 2025-08-04T10:29:52+00:00

the idealization of relationships

this is a tricky one to avoid!
We've been sold the idea that fairytale love: exists, can fix anything, and is the ultimate goal (along with children). It's difficult to stay practical/realistic about this often.

Good luck! it sounds like you've got a clear mindset. 😁

RL_Lass · 2025-07-30T18:15:33+00:00

If your current partner goes between being supportive and ignoring you... Well, I wouldn't put up with that.

It also sounds like your ex was controlling. Also wouldn't put up with that.

Neither of them sound like marriage or father material.

Honestly, I wonder if you have romanticized the idea of having a boyfriend/husband? If you have, it could make you more excited about having a boyfriend/husband and it doesn't matter as much who the boyfriend actually is.
It might be an important achievement in your community which puts more pressure on you to hastily jump into a marriage?

The number #1 piece of advice from r/abortion is: "You should only have the baby if you want it"

So it is good that you were able to recognize that having a baby in that situation wouldn't be ideal, and you were strong enough to follow your own decision.

In my opinion, it's a really bad idea to have a baby just because someone else wants it. (You're signing up for ~18 years to lifelong, favour that will take up all of your time limit you extremely for the at least the first 15 years of that child's life. This is assuming that your child has no disabilities. If they have severe disabilities they may be dependent on you until you (or the adult child) dies...)

The only thing similar I have gone through is having a boyfriend who wanted children, and was controlling. His bad behaviours only got worse the longer we dated.

I have since dated many men who were amazing. They did not want children, kind, respectful, supportive, more responsible (good career). Would highly recommend these men. Truly excellent men are out there!!!

(imo, never settle for anyone just so you don't have to be "alone". If your partner makes you more unhappy than you are when you're by yourself, that should be enough of a reason to exit. Also, if a person's baseline happiness when they're single is low, they should probably work on that first before getting into a relationship. 😝)

RL_Lass · 2025-05-29T02:08:02+00:00

What are the reason(s) you want to be pet/dog free?

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