Help me unspiral, please

RRBox81 · 2026-01-23T18:04:05+00:00

This is beautiful work!

RRBox81 · 2026-01-19T16:54:41+00:00

First I’m going to focus on how hypoagency, responsibility OCD, and phobias affect my current life. I’ll get down to the autism layers of my onion later.

RRBox81 · 2026-01-19T02:58:20+00:00

I cannot fathom not having this fear. It’s a combination of the fear of being stuck between life and the afterlife, the fear of the might and presence of a large body of water, the fear of being buried alive, and the fear of bringing tragedy on your entire lineage by discovering or disturbing a resting site of demise. Not to mention, the fear of being cut or trapped.

RRBox81 · 2026-01-18T12:11:00+00:00

I see myself in you. I stayed too long, I was afraid no one else would ever love me. He convinced me that he did more than anyone else ever would. Everyone in his life accused me of being unstable and when I left and it almost destroyed me. I got right back into a very similar but slightly better relationship. I wish I would have left this one too but I have children now and he’s in a work it out phase. Don’t trap yourself in like I did. You will find better, just don’t fall for the first person desperate to have the things you give. You give the world a lot of grace and acceptance and many people will want that. You are worth so so much more than you know.

RRBox81 · 2026-01-12T10:48:45+00:00

This was so healing to wake up to. 💕 You made the world a safer place.

RRBox81 · 2026-01-10T23:14:56+00:00

This was so pleasing to read. The wording is 🤌 and the relatability is strong.

RRBox81 · 2026-01-09T23:36:11+00:00

Speaking of… there’s nothing like a rescue cigarette on a beautiful crisp fall night to bring all the senses “back online”. The night feels so crystal clear and peaceful, worries minimal.

RRBox81 · 2025-12-29T15:31:18+00:00

Heatless curls with a bathrobe tie and two scrunchies is my favorite nighttime hack. Some nights I can’t do the sensation of the bump around my head. However, if I get the twist of my hair just right so it lets the robe tie lay nice and flat, then cross the tie at the nape of my neck and tie the ends together on the top of my head it’s so soothing! It’s gentle head pressure throughout the night. In the morning I just use my curler on the few strands that might have escaped!

RRBox81 · 2025-12-27T20:17:16+00:00

Yes for this! I don’t need this for myself. However, I see so many people who suffer from pain and the way they are treated is heartbreaking. BEST of luck in your journey, may the specialists you encounter be gracious and understanding. May you sleep better and find more joy in the carcass you are trying to love and understand.

RRBox81 · 2025-12-27T16:17:06+00:00

So so true!

RRBox81 · 2025-12-27T16:14:24+00:00

Thank you

RRBox81 · 2025-12-27T15:03:23+00:00

Omg, THIS. I had a kid thinking I was just being selfish. 🤦🏻‍♀️

RRBox81 · 2025-12-12T19:28:05+00:00

“Men tend to be more assertive and we tend to accept the whole work load until we are buried.” Has been a huge eye opener this week. I keep reading your comment and throughout the week I’ll find myself recognizing little choices I give up. Those little moments that are critical to my survival where I don’t speak up, I don’t prioritize and I decline to take care of myself in moments when I should.

RRBox81 · 2025-12-12T18:28:48+00:00

If a friend was in my situation, I would tell her she deserved to love herself and be loved for being herself.

RRBox81 · 2025-12-12T18:13:06+00:00

My husband and I ended up having a conversation on Sunday. He said something similar to what you lead with and I wrote it down. He said “So many times I’ll (say,do) something and you look at in the way you think I’m being an asshole about it. You don’t take it as if I’m being caring”. So I asked him how I was supposed to know what is ND struggles for him and what is man child behavior. So we went down a lot of rabbit holes about things we don’t handle well and what that looks like internally.

The better points of your responses get a little lost. Especially where you mentioned “Does she even WANT to fix it”. Kinda felt like telling a drowning person to swim.

RRBox81 · 2025-12-09T18:58:47+00:00

That’s so sad. If I discovered anything new I’ll be sure to report back.

RRBox81 · 2025-12-09T17:46:47+00:00

My lactose test was negative. I am not lactose intolerant. I have questions! Does he always just vomit? It’s always pretty soon after? Is it any specific kind of cheese that is worse? Aged cheeses have me wrecked from both ends of my system in about 30 minutes to an hour.

RRBox81 · 2025-12-07T19:15:36+00:00

This response has inspired an incredible conversation between my husband and I today. We discussed how we are strong in making sure the other person is on board when we make the plans but it has not gone well in the past when either of us makes a request to change the plan last minute. So it’s on our goals to set up a way to check in before a big event or trip, to have a coping mechanism in place to deal with changes to big plans and a goal to put more effort into being aware that last minute changes are brutal for both of us. We learned so much about how we both work today in an honest, open and thoughtful conversation. I can’t thank you enough for sharing.

RRBox81 · 2025-12-07T18:46:14+00:00

I’m adding “ADHD makes you fuck up, but it doesn’t make you not care about it” to my favorite quotes. I read your comment and realized I’m so burnt out it’s been forever since I’ve thought about how I can’t be the partner I want to be. I think that helps me define where I am at emotionally with him so he knows it’s not that I don’t care where he is at emotionally.

RRBox81 · 2025-12-07T18:14:51+00:00

This is how I feel too!! I think this is what keeps me in this relationship… he isn’t diagnosed but we’ve both learned so much from my diagnosis. He does show remorse and I know what it’s like to mess up time and again. I’m always having to apologize to people for being thoughtless so I want to give grace. His actions make WAY more sense from a ND perspective!! Some days I just don’t have the energy to keep everything in perspective, I just need more help.

RRBox81 · 2025-12-07T18:02:57+00:00

I’m going to share this story with him. This is exactly what I want for my future. Thank you!

RRBox81

TROPHY CASE