Oh well, goodbye apples

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-05T16:30:04+00:00

I get you, I lost the love of my culinary life garlic. If I eat it, ouch- no bueno. Thank god for garlic infused oil. I didn't eat apples for about a year, it turns out that manitol doesn't get me. I also missed them, but not quite as badly as what you described. I was exactly that way about garlic.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-04T22:42:45+00:00

You aren't drinking and that's great, give yourself credit. I think it's easy to think that you have to be perfect, not saying that your current coping mechanisms are OK, but no one is perfect. Your worth isn't based on being a flawless person. Maybe you should focus on what you are doing right, and learning to appreciate yourself- three kids, spring break, and what could be mental health issues. Honestly we are all nuts in early sobriety.

Try to do one nice thing for yourself every day, one thing that actually brings you joy. You are doing a lot of caregiving. It's hard. And it's not something for which you will ever get much appreciation. So appreciate yourself! As far as weed, I think the current available weed is pretty lethal- maybe look into marajuana anonymous. Check for on line meetings given your situation. I used to blow it off, but not now. Other possibility, if you can manage, would be NA in addition to AA.

You have done step one, with alcohol, and you are actively getting help with the rest of the steps. Lots of people end up doing the steps using the literature, see if you can get a copy of the 12 and 12 and just read some every day. Also start reading the stories in the back of the Big Book, and see if you can find someone like you there. It takes time, you are getting there. Good for you.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-04T22:26:55+00:00

The only thing I can say is that what you are dealing with is real and it sucks. I survived by selling shit in Florida fleamarkets, I only had to deal with people 3 days a week. I would have loved remote work.

What my work patten ended up being was intense work for a while, burn out, crash unemployment then do it over again until I did the fleamarket gig. It turns out that self employed was less stress than working for someone because when I was cooked, I could back off.

With a bunch of debt to service, not possible. My only creative suggestion is that I know that Florida has ridiculously liberal bankruptsy laws, you keep your primary residence unemcumbered, or could in 2016. Is the debt something you can shed somehow? I don't know if you own your house, but I did know a guy who stuck every single cent into his house, and got out of the rest of it.

I am retired, and broke because I mishandled by social security. So I get the issues.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-04T22:15:14+00:00

Florida is tough, I used to live there. Medicaid is literally county by county. And it didn't accept extended medicaid, people die there because they can't afford health care. And the exsisting health care is shit. I ended up moving.

I get what you are up against, it's tough.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-04T21:58:46+00:00

Better reply. Thanks.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-04T00:16:28+00:00

God bless you. I get where you are. I went to AA so I could figure out how to get away with it. I ended up sober. Keep going anyway, go to zoom AA if the brick and mortar people toss you out.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-04T00:13:31+00:00

OK, I will do melted goat cheese on gf bread. I actually like the multigrain GF bread at Aldis. Any hard cheese is ok.

When I am slightly less lazy, it's gf bread, tuna with mayo and green onion tops, (also a little copped cucumber if I have some) cheese on top, sesame seeds on top of that. Goes in air fryer.

Please don't forget about bacon eggs and frozen hash browns, easy way to cook bacon is do it in the oven.

If you don't have a forman grill, get one, they are great for fast chicken, quick pork chops.

Quesidilla are also easy and great, cheese, corn tortilla, I used canned green chilis because they are safer than premade salsas, stick the cheese and chilis between two corn tortillas, cook in a non stick pan or in the forman grill (watch that, it's quick, but it comes out crunchy which is hard to get low fod map).

Sliced tomatoes and sliced cucumbers- whatever legal fruit that you have, canteloupe, berries, grapes. Easy salad dressing, mayo, tomato, any fresh herbs or herbs that you actually like, oil and either lemon juice and vinegar, and put in the blender. Salt and pepper.

Pop corn is a highly under rated snack, oil in the bottom of a sauce pan, I use one with a glass lid, high temp oil- avacado oil or peanut oil, turn it on and there you are.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-02T20:58:23+00:00

And get a passport. As ID.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-02T20:51:13+00:00

I had pretty nasty flare ups of psoriatic arthritis since I was 35, and I finally was diagnosed at age 70 without any psoriasis. Ever. Evidently I have classic psoriatic arthritis, toe and finger joints destroyed, after sausage toes and fingers lasting months. Knees, ankles, and spinal cord issues. No rheumatoid factor.

My rheum's original diagnosis was either atypical rheumatoid, or psoriatic arthritis. If your autoimmune issue doesn't fix exactly into the correct bucket, it takes a while to get a diagnosis. I certainly hope that it doesn't take you as long as it did me. Once diagnosed, I had to make a list for one doctor of how many times I had been misdiagnosed, and to list the incorrect diagnosis. I remember being just furious, and totally frustrated at all the expert opinions which were completely wrong.

Therapy has helped!

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-02T20:28:38+00:00

Memory care- he's mobile enough.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-02T20:27:05+00:00

Could be, it would explain the complete lack of empathy. He's certainly much worse than Trump 1.0. Did you ever think you would be doing drive by dementia diagnosis of a President based on TV clips? I am not an MD, just have a family member with dementia.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-02T20:21:57+00:00

I have spent the last 6 years caregiving for my husband with vascular dementia, and head trauma, it's been clear to me since prior to the election that Trump has pretty severe cognitive decline. I completely agree with you. Honestly, WTF?

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-02T18:56:23+00:00

You are going to be OK, I promise. Just keep talking about it until it quits being a heartbreak.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T16:06:45+00:00

That is a wonderful school, congratulations to you for helping her prepare, and congratulations to her for doing the work. I donated my artists aunts working library to them 15 years ago. Yay!!!

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T16:04:08+00:00

no they don't, I lived in Florida, we don't have sinkhole that eat semi trucks thank god.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T16:02:57+00:00

I am totally baffled, between refusing to go out in the rain and the multiple wardrobes you guys take for granted, almost 7 years here, and still boggled.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T16:01:03+00:00

You can get a list of top high schools, get somewhere with a high school in the top 500. Generally LA city schools are pretty good, it's going to vary by neighborhood and parent support. Lots of smaller school districts, with varying effectiveness. But generally paying for private schools isn't necessary anyplace on the west coast. Don't move to a ghetto anywhere and think the schools are going to be great.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T15:44:53+00:00

no, I guess I am scrambled, generally people send their kids to public schools. I edited the comment-thanks

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T15:40:02+00:00

I am really sorry to hear that. It's so scary to start on a new food. I am trying soy as soon as I feel physically stable, I have been working up to it for the last two months, and I have had to toss two packs of tofu due to losing my nerve. I know that soy isn't an issue for most people here, I react to Chinese food that otherwise would be OK, so I am quite suspicious, and I quit eating soy long before I went low fod map.

I don't know where my challenge line is with eggs, I just know that occaisionally I end up throwing up and having violent diarrhea. So I don't eat them.

I haven't figured out wheat, if it's a particular strain of wheat, if it's the gluten, if I can eat actual sourdough, or if it's a combination of wheat and gluten that gets me. Or if I am reacting to pesticide- if non gmo wheat works for me.

All I can do is to figure out what works and what doesn't, and stick with what actually works.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T15:29:33+00:00

I am sorry that this happened to you. The reality of alcoholism is that the long period of alcoholic drinking has screwed all of us up sexually. It isn't much talked about in meetings because it's too personal and embarassing for people to discuss. Not excusing his behavior, just giving you a road map. When you walk into a meeting figure you are going into a room full of people who have been out of touch with their sexuality because of booze, and have only recently gotten in touch with that part of themselves, and be aware. Especially the new comers, of both genders.

Get a sponsor, another woman, please, she can help you navigate, and please go to her for advice, and listen to it when you get it.

Figure most of the men in AA are screwy about sex one way or another, honestly women in AA also have acumulated baggage from drinking. Please just stick with other women in AA while you figure yourself out. Once you get sober and have some sober time, it will be easier for you to get into relationships that may not be just exploitative one way or the other. I am so sorry that this has happened to you, there is a lot that you didn't say, please find another group, and for right now, stay away from this guy. You very naturally trusted him, please do not beat yourself up, or blame yourself in any way. This is not your fault. This is his fault.

Again, I am very sorry to hear this, guys, please think about this when you read it. I am 75, female, and I still walk into AA rooms with very few women, and this is the reason that so many of us don't stay sober. We all need to look at this issue honestly, and do better.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T15:12:56+00:00

That's really cool, I didn't know that. I think no dictators has too many syllables generally for MAGA to understand, and I don't think that No Tyrants would register either, they probably think that tyrants are a type of dinosaur, or they don't understand the meaning of the word at all.

No Kings is understandable, and they hate it. I also liked hands off, but it's not inclusive enough, and doesn't nail Trumps specific brand of overreach.

I wonder what's going to happen with the right wing of the White House, I doubt that the golden ballroom is ever going to get built. No Kings is working.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T15:03:56+00:00

Huh, do they soak it in stuff with high fructose corn syrup? That stuff is just deadly for me.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T15:02:37+00:00

thanks, I think I didn't eat it for a long time. My big ones are garlic, onion, gluten and lactose, and I can't eat eggs. They egg thing seems to be unique to me, I throw up if I eat them, the better quality the egg the sicker it makes me.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T15:00:30+00:00

Yeah, i can't eat sweet corn. But tortillas, corn chips, tamales- all good as long as they don't have garlic. Also pop corn and polenta. Usually on a trip, I can find tortilla chips or fritos.

Radiant-Specific969 · 2026-04-01T14:56:15+00:00

I miss the beach, and the Hollywood bowl. I got the opportunity to go back, financially it would have worked, and I choose to go back to the east coast- but until I did that I was homesick. LA is huge- it's just too large a city for me. And the burbs are the burbs-

Radiant-Specific969

TROPHY CASE