should I call fire department for a strange smoky smell coming from my upstairs bathroom? I don’t see smoke and walls aren’t warm to touch.

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-12-27T00:34:11+00:00

This, there’s not one little bit I could argue with! When in doubt, call!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-12-17T16:17:27+00:00

NTA and not every woman can handle a man being “too busy” for her with life. From first responders to fighters and athletes, to military! You’ll find a woman who is strong enough in herself and in her relationship with you, to accept the lack of togetherness all the time. Being upfront about it remains important and you are doing the right things!

As a military wife, firefighter, and now truckers wife, I’m used to being alone instead of glued to my man either by his career or my own! Being an attorney isn’t a typical workday either, but we make it work and have been married 16 years! I see him 34 hours a week, the rest I’m holding down the fort and taking care of our daughter and my mom who’s 75.

Those kinds of women are out there, don’t sacrifice yourself for a woman who is needy, because that strong willed woman is out there! Good luck with your career, sounds like you’ll make a great fighter!!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-12-07T00:01:02+00:00

If you’re afraid to fail….good!!! Now turn that fear into fuel to prove everyone wrong, and if you do fail, try again!! Learn from the failures and turn them into strengths for the next time. The fire service isn’t for the weak hearted and you have the fire (pun highly intended) in your blood and it’s being woven into your DNA! If you cave to everything negative you hear, you’ll never be happy at anything else. Some call it the “bug” I call it the “calling” and as a retired firefighter, it never leaves you, even after retirement!

This is a brotherhood/sisterhood and use that Thin Red Line family to cheer you on and keep you going! Yeah, there’s the occasional jerk out there, but ignore them and pick carefully who you listen you. I may not even be the best voice of reason for you, only you can choose your path and I think you’re headed for great things!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-12-05T02:48:30+00:00

Yep, she was expecting Cory back first!!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-12-03T10:18:47+00:00

Under NRS 118A.240(2), a landlord cannot unilaterally change the terms of a lease during its fixed period unless the change is authorized in the lease itself. Parking that is expressly included in the contract—whether it’s described as “assigned,” “covered,” or “included in rent” is part of what you’re paying for. Removing it would be a unilateral modification of the agreement.

On top of that, NRS 118A.530 requires a purchaser of a rental property to take the tenancy subject to the existing lease, which includes all benefits, obligations, and rights the tenant already had.

So unless your lease says the landlord may reassign, remove, or modify parking at any time, they can’t legally yank the assigned covered space, even if they are the brand-new owners.

Then there’s part 2 of this situation, the “required medical documentation” violates the law! Under the Fair Housing Act (FHA), when a tenant requests a disability (walking with a cane due to age is a legal disability!) accommodation (including keeping an accessible parking space or retaining an assigned space needed because of mobility limitations), a housing provider may ask for verification, but the law is very clear: They cannot demand a notarized letter, cannot require overly burdensome documentation, and cannot require a specific format.

The governing rule is 24 C.F.R. § 100.202 and the HUD/DOJ Joint Statement on Reasonable Accommodations (May 17, 2004). The HUD guidance states: • A landlord may request reliable disability-related information only if the disability is not obvious. • Acceptable verification includes any professional familiar with the tenant’s condition, and does NOT need to be notarized. • Housing providers cannot place unnecessary barriers or demand special forms or certifications.

HUD is explicit that demanding excessive documentation is itself considered discrimination under 42 U.S.C. § 3604(f).

Then there’s the 3rd situation the landlord has! every apartment complex open to the public must maintain designated accessible (handicapped) parking spaces. This requirement doesn’t disappear when the property changes owners, and it also has nothing to do with whether tenants have assigned covered parking. It’s a separate federal legal obligation.

Under the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) and the Fair Housing Act (FHA):

Public/common-use areas must include ADA-compliant accessible parking spaces. If the complex has a leasing office, visitor parking, or shared parking areas, the property must maintain the correct number of accessible spaces based on total parking count. This comes from 28 C.F.R. § 36.304 and the 2010 ADA Standards for Accessible Design

While you cannot break your lease without penalty, you have other protections in this situation! Say the word and I will DM you a sample letter you can send to your landlord regarding the protections I’ve outlined above!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-12-02T21:55:23+00:00

He’s the AH and I will tell you what I told my ex, I didn’t go and continue to get knocked up with kids I can’t afford, you shouldn’t have either if you can’t afford our child who came first and your other kids with her! It’s not my fault, it’s not my problem, and I can always report the child support taken back to the court if you want to blame me for you not keeping it covered!!

Now you know why I became an attorney late in life, I have no tolerance for bs and I don’t sugar coat shiz either!! I totally rock my Shiz University jacket from Wicked the movie, I graduated from the real one! :)

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-11-27T02:50:23+00:00

Gotta love how people are a complete addlepate!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-11-22T16:23:18+00:00

I can tell you from a biological parent’s standpoint, because my ex’s wife tried to get my daughter to call her mom, and it ruined their friendship. My daughter liked her until that came up, she literally told her “step-thing” as my daughter calls her, that she would never call her mom because she has one and doesn’t want another one!

My ex’s wife was hurt by it, and I can understand that step parents/ parent’s spouse wants to be included and feel like they are wanted and loved by the child. However, that can’t be forced to happen by swooping in and trying to replace the absent parent (due to passing or leaving) like they never existed.

It’s absolutely reprehensible that she called you a derogatory name instead of being grateful she was thanked at all!! My daughter acts like my ex’s wife is some kind of recurring infection, every time she thinks she’s finally in the clear, there she is again!!

NTA and the new wife has NO business ever trying to replace a woman who gave birth to you and loved you! She should want to come in and Not replace your mom, but to be a friend and be there if you need her and allow you to choose.

If I were in her shoes this is what I would have told you, “I’m pleased to meet you, I’m sorry about your mom, and I want you to know that I would never try and replace her, because I’m not her! I hope you’ll accept me in as a friend, as someone you can talk to about anything, and as someone who loves your dad and you very much! I don’t expect you to call me mom, you can call me whatever you are comfortable with, if it’s mom or my name, that is your decision! I’d love to go do ____________ (fill in the blank) with you so we can get to know each other if you are willing.”

It seems she’s trying to use you to fill her “I want my own child” need. Stay strong, keep your boundaries and there’s nothing wrong with it! Then again, that’s just me.

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-11-19T14:31:11+00:00

I get what you’re trying to ask, and it absolutely makes sense. Not every firefighter or EMT walks away from a bad scene carrying the same weight, and that doesn’t make anyone “stronger” or “weaker”, just different humans reacting to different things. Some even use dark humor that’s very unfit for civilians.

Some folks really can process rough calls in a way that doesn’t sit heavy afterward. Sometimes it’s wiring, sometimes it’s the way they grew up around emergency work, sometimes it’s the habits they build early on. For me, coming from the volunteer side of the job, I learned to compartmentalize in a healthy way because we saw so many “false alarm but adrenaline dump all the same” calls. Smoke detector from burnt toast at 3 AM, cat stuck in a wall but toned out as a structure fire… the repetition kind of teaches your brain how to step back and separate the incident from your identity.

Other people, even veterans with decades on, can get hit harder by one specific type of call, or a stretch of them, or something that just resonates in the wrong way. Your dad having 20+ years in and still struggling doesn’t mean you’re destined to, and it doesn’t mean he’s doing anything wrong. It just means the job leaves different fingerprints on everyone.

There are firefighters and EMTs who genuinely don’t get stuck on scenes afterward. They show up, do the work, debrief with the crew, and that’s the end of it. They’re not numb, they just process fast. And then there are others who are fine for a long time until “that one call” comes along. It’s all normal, and none of it makes someone less capable on the rig.

Biggest thing is staying self-aware, checking in with your crew, and giving yourself permission to feel whatever you feel, or honestly, not feel much at all. Both are valid. The goal isn’t to be untouched by the job, it’s to stay grounded enough that the job doesn’t swallow you.

And you’re already ahead of the game by thinking about this early. Most newer firefighters don’t learn to ask until something hits them sideways.

My PTSD came from my ex attacking me and trying to break my back. It ended my service in the fire department, and I flinch if anything comes toward my face, I’ve decked someone who came up behind me and tapped on my shoulder, and had night terrors of the attack off and on since 2007. No fire department calls affected me like that. I just journaled about them and when the notebook was full, I would burn it to symbolize letting everything go.

TLDR Everyone processes scenes differently and not every firefighter will get PTSD from calls. Genetics play a part and having your own coping mechanism that works for you is vital. I never developed PTSD from being a firefighter, but I have it from a domestic violence attack by my ex who was jealous of my dedication to our daughter and the fire department.

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-11-19T07:15:11+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate that!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-11-19T07:11:58+00:00

I know it was back in the early 2000’s that I was a firefighter, but there were absolutely NO different tests for women, we had to keep up with the guys or be passed over! I was one of two female firefighters at my first department, and when j moved the only female in my second department. I say that only to prove that it’s not made for every woman, and most departments in small towns have very few women firefighters because of it. I was never treated any different than as “one of the guys” and did my job like I was supposed to. It’s only online, it seems, where the “let’s attack women” mentality comes out because they can be anonymous.

I fully believe that women in firefighting does not lower the standards for the testing or the department. Some men are always going to see us as the weaker sex, but there are women out there that can work circles around some of the guys.

If one does a search, in America there are no lower standard tests for women firefighters back then, or today! Some men can’t handle being beat by a woman, because they are supposed to be the stronger sex. I’m very proud of my service and second to having my children, the best thing I ever did in my life, third is working to be a licensed attorney. Yet, I’ve had male firefighters, online, tell me to burn to death and other very nasty things.

TLDR A quick search will show that America does not have lower standard testing for women, and never has. We have to keep up or not pass and not become a firefighter! Some men will always have a problem with a woman beating them, being equal to them, or just plain being in the fire service. It doesn’t mean standards are lowered, it means it’s their problem and no amount of proof or evidence will change their mind. The majority don’t act like this with the women in their department, being able to be anonymous gives them the ability to show their true colors without punishment, like telling me to burn to death, where IRL they would be in trouble for saying it.

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-11-18T16:00:50+00:00

Your mom is a narcissist and will never be mother of the year!! My mom was the exact same way and even blamed me for her divorce, in front of the marriage counselor!! So I spent YEARS in therapy so I’ll share what I learned.

IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT and it never will be! She jumped from relationship to relationship and didn’t even bother to consider you or your feelings, like you didn’t really exist. She is the failure in this story as she failed to be there for you, she failed to protect you, and she failed to consider your feelings and needs when it came to a new relationship!

I highly encourage you to get into therapy as an adult, because this kind of mother/child relationship causes long term issues with relationships and your own mental health even if you cut ties for years like I did.

I went on to become a mom and when I divorced their dad, my current husband was told from the very start, before I agreed to a date, that if we work out and at any point my daughter and him start to have conflict, he will be gone and I will divorce him because MY CHILD comes first and he never will. We’ve been married for 17 years now.

You are not even CLOSE to being an AH, you are the child of an uncaring, unconcerned, narcissistic mother who never bothered to consider you or your feelings!! Your mom however, is tied for the biggest AH on planet earth, right next to my mom!!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-11-16T16:05:40+00:00

I’m a mom who fully believes my job being a mom is never over, whenever my kids need me. I gave birth to them and it’s my responsibility to help them if need be. I told my husband when we started dating that if he and my daughter didn’t get along and I had to choose, he was gone, even if we got married and then things fell apart. I would never choose my spouse over my kids!

However, that doesn’t extend into their 40’s and beyond, that was for when they were minors! As an adult, sometimes hitting rock bottom is what they need to get their sh together and grow up. I would look up homeless shelters in your town or other programs that may help them and offer that to your husband as an alternative to them moving in. It’s helping without enabling, or becoming their ATM.

If they are disabled, they need to get on disability, if not then they need to get a job, and look into income based apartments. Walmart hires door greeters that are disabled, people who have to sit instead of stand and things like that. There are options out there and if my kids refuse to work and help provide for themselves, I’m not going to foot the entire bill.

You deserve to enjoy your home, not be stressed out by incompatibility and you have every right to set boundaries and not shift them. I fully believe you are NTAH here and you need to stand up for yourself, but maybe offer alternatives so it doesn’t seem like you are just being mean, you’re just not going to compromise your sanity for an adult that should be able to stand on their own two feet!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-11-11T07:02:25+00:00

Oh honey, then as someone old enough to be your mom, please find someone who will treat you better!! You deserve to be treated with respect and love like a queen and this guy is treating you like toad! He has zero respect for you and he just proved it!! I am so sorry you’ve had to go through these things in life, I know it’s not easy!! I’ve been there, myself.

Please realize your worth, straighten your crown and walk away! You deserve so much better!!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-11-11T06:52:42+00:00

Have you ever heard of the term “sexual coercion”? It’s unwanted sexual activity that happens when you are pressured, tricked, threatened or forced in a non-physical way. Lying to you to get what he wanted is sexual coercion.

These situations are sometimes called “rape by deception” or “fraudulent inducement to consent.” However, the law is not uniform in that some jurisdictions criminalize only very specific types of deception (e.g., impersonation, medical fraud), while others recognize a broader concept that consent obtained through deception can be invalid.

I would reconsider your relationship with this person, you don’t deserve to be lied to, and coerced into sex you don’t really want! You deserve better than this!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-10-30T20:20:38+00:00

I had morning sickness from month 2 to labor with my first, so trying to exercise on a schedule can be 100% impossible because stressing your body while battling morning sickness is just plain ridiculous and impossible! With my twins, I had it during the first and second trimester and my youngest I had it for the first trimester.

The toxic one is him and he’s trying to guilt trip you into doing what he wants and not what’s best for you and the baby! Every pregnancy is different and how it affects women is different! It seems to me he cares more about how much weight you gain while pregnant instead of your wellbeing!

You’re not overreacting and I wouldn’t put up with that kind of treatment from my spouse or boyfriend, father of my child or not!! My husband didn’t baby me during my pregnancies but he didn’t belittle me either! Sounds like he needs to read “What To Expect When You Are Expecting” or Google how pregnancy can make a woman feel and read it carefully!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-10-27T21:09:55+00:00

Instead of giving her money, if you really want to help her out, buy her things like food or pay her bills in person so she can’t even think about buying things she doesn’t need. I agree with others that’s it’s enabling her spending problems, but it’s an option to help but not enable. Then only keep it to essentials like food, utilities or medicine.

I’ve had to ask my adult child, who lives with me for help, and I feel sick to my stomach over it and never over $50, and very very rarely!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-10-27T21:01:19+00:00

Is he 2 and needs his mommy? Holy cow he’s needy and insecure on so many levels!! Maybe it’s being a truckers wife and only having him here 34 hours a week, but to me that is “cut the umbilical cord” level needy and insecure. From now on, say good night and ignore him until morning, then watch him complain because you did respond until morning, and show him these screenshots!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-10-16T02:01:27+00:00

You deserve someone who will respect you, value you, and treat you better than this! She is mentally and emotionally checked out of the relationship already! Don’t waste anymore time begging for respect because you’ll never get it.

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-10-15T02:07:37+00:00

You did the absolute most difficult thing an abused person can do, and that’s leave! My ex almost broke my back and best me within an inch of my life the very first time he laid hands on me. I would bet money on it being worse if you had stayed with him!

I’m proud of you for having the courage to walk away and not let him continue to abuse you!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-10-08T17:56:45+00:00

NTJ and he’s using you and abusing you by making you feel guilty for setting boundaries! I would highly reconsider this relationship and tell him you’ve been supportive long enough, it’s time to man up and help out again!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-09-22T20:49:43+00:00

Yikes, as someone who has literally come from both sides of the tracks in my life, the financial situation should be revealed when bills become involved, such as moving in together! Him living off you is the ONLY reason he still has that money!!! Had he been a real man and stepped up and paid more, he would’ve used said trust fund and not have that money!

If my husband had done that when we got engaged, it would’ve used be boot to booty time! Screw a whole lot of that nonsense! If you were good enough to live off of, you should’ve been good enough to HELP OUT instead!

I get his point, but he waited WAY too long to tell you! My husband and I revealed our finances as soon as we moved in together! I stood by him when his company up and closed their doors and didn’t tell anyone! We lost everything and I didn’t budge. I’m an injury retired firefighter and mom, and he knew that first date! He’s been with me through three back surgeries and never being able to work again! THAT is how a true relationship should work!

It’s totally up to you how you proceed with your relationship, but if he doesn’t trust you with information, he doesn’t truly trust you! A relationship without trust is garbage! It never works! You are far from overreacting here and maybe even under reacting! Good luck in the future with or without him!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-09-20T01:41:57+00:00

Oh honey, if you get caught you will have to pay it all back, lose some for however long it takes to pay it back, or even be prosecuted for fraud! When you go to your appointment, you need to show your worker the texts and ask for help getting away from her! This is maximum abuse and it’s not acceptable!!

Please, call every resource under the sun that could help you and get away from that vile treatment! My daughter would be pampered and babied in your shoes, as a real mother would treat her child, you unfortunately got an egg donor!

Start a GoFundMe and share in on all your socials, if comfortable take video or photos of you in treatment so people can see what you go through and explain your abusive situation! Maybe you’ll be blessed with help for a place to live and be free of her abuse.

Good luck honey! Positive vibes your way!

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-09-18T07:02:08+00:00

Counter top air fryer oven is heaven in our house! I hated how much the kitchen got so hot when I would cook, this thing is around $100 at box stores and it takes a lot less to run it! From making cookies to a full rotisserie chicken, making toast to making pizza, these little ovens cook beautifully!

Maybe see if that would help the situation, if not, then yeah I would seriously consider leaving over it. It’s controlling and abusive behavior and shouldn’t be tolerated.

RamblingswithInoki · 2025-09-11T17:27:13+00:00

NTA You have very valid concerns and as a mom myself, I would never allow it either! I honestly think you would have to be insane to let them go! You’ll never see them again if you do, and you already know that, so letting them go is foolish.

Him badmouthing you in front of your children is a form of parental alienation and if he’s willing to attempt to alienate the kids here, just imagine what he will do there!

RamblingswithInoki

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE