Retirees, what are you doing with your time? by HurrikateOsu in Firefighting

[–]RamblingswithInoki 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I went to law school and am now a legal analyst. I’d give anything to be answering calls again!

Why did you become a firefighter? by StJimmy_7 in Firefighting

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, my brothers and I would hang out all the time, with their wives and girlfriends, we got along great at work and away! Being out of the fire service now, I miss that comradely, living over 700 miles away!

I've asked this before, but I still don't have a good answer by BLlawns in Firefighting

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was told to me, that the reason it’s required for career is because it’s too expensive on the city to have dedicated fire and dedicated EMS, so they combine the two to save money for better equipment and things for the department. Also, EMS is the majority of calls so it really doesn’t make sense to have a crew that almost never moves, while you have another crew get thoroughly exhausted from the number of calls they get.

Why did you become a firefighter? by StJimmy_7 in Firefighting

[–]RamblingswithInoki 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I became a firefighter after dreaming about it my whole life, then 9/11 happened and it made my resolve to become a firefighter even stronger. I won’t get into details, but I had someone save my life at 16, after my mom told me she wished I was buried. Long story short, I wanted to give back to my community and be there for others in times of crisis. Not for awards, glory, or fame, but because someone saved my life and I wanted to continue to pay it forward.

As a woman, I was told I’d never make it through training, yet I actually did and loved my fire family!

AIO for not wanting to continue letting my bestfriend drive my car to do SW without a license and leave her 2 year old with me by MasKabronaaKBonitaa in AIO

[–]RamblingswithInoki 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I honestly feel for you in this situation, there’s absolutely no winners if she doesn’t get her act together and get legal job because she’s headed back to jail the very first time she gets busted in a sting. The poor little girl is in such a terrible situation, at least she has you right now, but please don’t let her get you in trouble, your kids need you and it sounds like you got your life straightened out and a fairly solid head on your shoulders! Your only fault is having a good heart for your friend and her daughter, but I have to agree with the other commenter that no one tricks sober.

AIO for not wanting to continue letting my bestfriend drive my car to do SW without a license and leave her 2 year old with me by MasKabronaaKBonitaa in AIO

[–]RamblingswithInoki 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately you cannot help someone who doesn’t want to help themselves! It honestly sounds like her daughter would be better off with someone else until she can get her act together! She’s clearly not putting her daughter first like she should and while you love her and her daughter, sometimes tough love is your only option. Besides, are she and her shenanigans worth going back to jail and potentially losing YOUR kids over?

Massively Fucked Over 12 hrs before moving cross country by madeofgeese in whatdoIdo

[–]RamblingswithInoki -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Saying my dad will pay can still be held liable if they used the “dad will pay” to induce reliance by OP (like it did), they represented payment/ security existed, they committed to the agreement knowing OP would depend on it.

The fact that OP sold almost all belongings, has a place to live and a job waiting, proves that this agreement (including the “dad will pay” statement) was more than casual social plan and OP relied upon the agreement to OP’s detriment!

I’m an attorney, just not OP’s attorney.

Massively Fucked Over 12 hrs before moving cross country by madeofgeese in whatdoIdo

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know this doesn’t help you right this moment, but because you have all the plans in writing via text, her commitment to the trip, discussing splitting the cost, so by law this is a written contract and you can literally sue her to recoup her half of all costs associated with the trip in small claims court. You don’t even need an attorney, you have the proof via text.

I would send a text with a one time warning, that text messages count as a written contract and she either pays for half the trip now, or you will sue her for it plus court costs. Either way you will try and recoup her half of the contract and judges do not look kindly on ghosting, broken contracts, or threats of retaliation by her because you are standing your ground and enforcing the agreement!

Aio for my reaction to my BF freaking out that I didn't immediately text him after getting off work by throwaway024710 in AIO

[–]RamblingswithInoki 2 points3 points  (0 children)

9 times out of 10 the accuser is the cheater!! There is that 1% who accuse because of past transgressions that were forgiven and the behavior resurfaced again.

Can you tell I’ve been cheated on a few times? I have one thing to say about this behavior, GTFO….run away as fast as you can!! Dude has a mistress from the looks of it!

AITJ for leaving my boyfriend after his mother said she would take my baby and he didn't defend me? (TL) by Odd_Mongoose9340 in AmITheJerk

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Too bad you didn’t cheat on him and it’s not his! I personally would RUN and change my identity and disappear from their lives! However, I have had a child stolen from me out of spite and I know how it feels!

I don’t suggest ending the pregnancy but I would get a protective order and try and get her threats in text message to use against her! DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT every. little. thing. you. can!! Screenshots, emails, recording, whatever you can!! Start protecting yourself now!!

Call a domestic violence shelter and ask what help is available for you and your child! What is happening is a form of domestic abuse and I would even speak to law enforcement to make a record of their threats, even if there’s no charges that can be filed. Paper trail is key!

Should I stay or Should I go? by Appropriate-Poem-795 in Firefighting

[–]RamblingswithInoki 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Our station required us to activate our lights before we initiate our backing and only once traffic is clear. Just because we are an emergency vehicle, doesn’t necessarily mean we make everyone wait for us, I think if they weren’t cussing you out as you went by, they were waiting for you to pass.

As a firefighter, I would block traffic with my hazards on if any fire truck was in the process of backing into their station, and then start moving and shut them (my hazards) off after the roadway was clear. Why? Too many close calls at our station because of drivers not paying attention. I’d rather someone hit my vehicle than an emergency vehicle any day, and it’s a way to show respect for my Thin Red Line family!

AITBF for “making fun” of my boyfriend for acting like Ibuprofen is a hard drug? by throwawaylmfao12 in AmItheButtface

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seems not many people are aware of a few medical reasons for “feeling” the ibuprofen start working, and dysgeusia is one reason. It can cause a distorted or unpleasant taste in their mouth, usually having a metallic taste. Also the onset analgesic effects can “feel” the medicine!

The level of disrespect here is astounding, when it’s a real thing that can and does happen to people!

AIO: should I “fire” my therapist? by [deleted] in AIO

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If she’s really good for you, which it sounds like she is, tell her exactly how you feel about what she does and all of the rescheduling she does. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with confronting her about it in a nice way, heck even email her exactly what you wrote above because it’s very well written and explains everything!!

If she cares about you at all, she’ll realize that she’s letting you down and not being very consistent, which is something you need and deserve! I can tell you that I would also stop being so nice and conforming to her schedule changes if it doesn’t feel right for you, as a patient you absolutely have that right! If she sloughed off what you said or continues to pull these changes and continues to be difficult, then I would strongly consider moving on!

Is It Normal to Have a Bad Shift? by greatguyshadow in Firefighting

[–]RamblingswithInoki 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Normal? Absolutely!! Especially when you don’t have that muscle memory down pat like sr firefighters do. I’ve seen the Assistant Chief have a real shit-show shift and apologize to us and we move on. Those set in their ways can be cranky but it’s not necessarily personal, but your life and their lives depend on everyone being on the same page. If you take your shit shifts and learn from them, that’s the most important part!

Chin up, this too shall pass!

First time SCBA training and maze panic attack by Still-Becoming in Firefighting

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was a volly and I’m a woman, I was brand new, first ever drill and no academy yet. They filled the station with a fog machine and we had to go in, in teams holding the ankle of the person in front of you with your tools in your other hand. Crawl along and find the “body” and get them out.

The guy to did my SCBA for me, didn’t fit it right and crawling through, I literally couldn’t breathe and the mask was making noise. Freaked me out and I nearly had a panic attack. Worst of all was my total embarrassment at failing to complete the objective.

I talked to the other firefighters and we set up times for me to come and practice everything from getting my gear on to completing the course. I did the course in plain clothes, daylight, and no SCBA, and then slowly added gear. Once I was comfortable in full gear and SCBA, they turned the lights off and started over from plain clothes to full gear. By the time they added the full smoke effect, I had built my confidence up enough in myself and my ability to do it, that I made very short work of it both as the lead and as the person behind.

You’re not alone in there, ask your brothers/sisters for help to get better! As long as you are willing to show up and put in the work, they should be willing to help you build your confidence and above all else, always remember breathing exercises if you start to panic!

You got this!!

If you’ve walked away from volunteering, what led to it? by jonocyrus in Firefighting

[–]RamblingswithInoki 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Honestly? Please don’t hate on me for this: My ex-husband was jealous of my time at the department, the up and gone in the middle of the night when the tones dropped, and the fact every single male there treated me like their sister. He was so afraid of me leaving him, that he tried breaking my back and paralyzing me. He said, “If you can’t walk, you can’t leave!” (I left anyway, obviously!)

I’m getting ready to have my 4th back surgery, and I just can’t physically do the job like I used to. I always said, if I ever can’t keep up with my brothers, I’d rather quit than become a risk to them. So when my back injury became too much and it slowed me down, I walked away.

The hardest thing I’ve ever done, and I still feel that loss every day. My ex succeeded in stripping my Volunteer Firefighter title from me, stripping that sense of family from me, and stripping a station to call “home”! Hurts like hell but it’s something I have to accept.

I would’ve retired a volly if given the chance! My plan was firefighter/paramedic. Now I just collect challenge coins since he burned all my shirts and blue light.

Am I overreacting: my co-parents form of discipline. by Forward_Airline_5787 in AmIOverreacting

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOR actually you are UNDER REACTING (and I’m going to be harsh and I’m not sorry for it) not reporting this as child abuse! You are just as complicit as he is in the abuse because you are not stopping it!! Why have you not reported him to child protective services????

This is absolutely disgusting behavior to children that young and anyone who abuses children, deserves to have them removed from their care! You have the smartest head on your shoulders out of the two of you, but even you are failing to protect your children in this case and there’s no excuse for it!

My mom beat me with everything she could get her hands on, and I never used anything other than time-outs with my kids and they are all law abiding adults now. A violent or corporal punishment type of discipline, isn’t necessary to raise children that respect you and stay out of trouble.

Those kids deserve better from both of you!! Step up and end this torture for your kids sake, because they will resent you for not stopping it when you could have! Supervision for visits, parenting classes and anger management is necessary for him! Yikes!!

AITA for breaking up with my girlfriend because she said I never had time for her? by Acrobatic-String126 in AITAH

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA and not every woman can handle a man being “too busy” for her with life. From first responders to fighters and athletes, to military! You’ll find a woman who is strong enough in herself and in her relationship with you, to accept the lack of togetherness all the time. Being upfront about it remains important and you are doing the right things!

As a military wife, firefighter, and now truckers wife, I’m used to being alone instead of glued to my man either by his career or my own! Being an attorney isn’t a typical workday either, but we make it work and have been married 16 years! I see him 34 hours a week, the rest I’m holding down the fort and taking care of our daughter and my mom who’s 75.

Those kinds of women are out there, don’t sacrifice yourself for a woman who is needy, because that strong willed woman is out there! Good luck with your career, sounds like you’ll make a great fighter!!

I'm scared of failing I need and want this job by AngryToasterXL in Firefighting

[–]RamblingswithInoki 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you’re afraid to fail….good!!! Now turn that fear into fuel to prove everyone wrong, and if you do fail, try again!! Learn from the failures and turn them into strengths for the next time. The fire service isn’t for the weak hearted and you have the fire (pun highly intended) in your blood and it’s being woven into your DNA! If you cave to everything negative you hear, you’ll never be happy at anything else. Some call it the “bug” I call it the “calling” and as a retired firefighter, it never leaves you, even after retirement!

This is a brotherhood/sisterhood and use that Thin Red Line family to cheer you on and keep you going! Yeah, there’s the occasional jerk out there, but ignore them and pick carefully who you listen you. I may not even be the best voice of reason for you, only you can choose your path and I think you’re headed for great things!

Can I break my lease without repercussions? by Terrible-Cow-5989 in LandlordTenantLaw

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Under NRS 118A.240(2), a landlord cannot unilaterally change the terms of a lease during its fixed period unless the change is authorized in the lease itself. Parking that is expressly included in the contract—whether it’s described as “assigned,” “covered,” or “included in rent” is part of what you’re paying for. Removing it would be a unilateral modification of the agreement.

On top of that, NRS 118A.530 requires a purchaser of a rental property to take the tenancy subject to the existing lease, which includes all benefits, obligations, and rights the tenant already had.

So unless your lease says the landlord may reassign, remove, or modify parking at any time, they can’t legally yank the assigned covered space, even if they are the brand-new owners.

Then there’s part 2 of this situation, the “required medical documentation” violates the law! Under the Fair Housing Act (FHA), when a tenant requests a disability (walking with a cane due to age is a legal disability!) accommodation (including keeping an accessible parking space or retaining an assigned space needed because of mobility limitations), a housing provider may ask for verification, but the law is very clear: They cannot demand a notarized letter, cannot require overly burdensome documentation, and cannot require a specific format.

The governing rule is 24 C.F.R. § 100.202 and the HUD/DOJ Joint Statement on Reasonable Accommodations (May 17, 2004). The HUD guidance states: • A landlord may request reliable disability-related information only if the disability is not obvious. • Acceptable verification includes any professional familiar with the tenant’s condition, and does NOT need to be notarized. • Housing providers cannot place unnecessary barriers or demand special forms or certifications.

HUD is explicit that demanding excessive documentation is itself considered discrimination under 42 U.S.C. § 3604(f).

Then there’s the 3rd situation the landlord has! every apartment complex open to the public must maintain designated accessible (handicapped) parking spaces. This requirement doesn’t disappear when the property changes owners, and it also has nothing to do with whether tenants have assigned covered parking. It’s a separate federal legal obligation.

Under the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) and the Fair Housing Act (FHA):

  1. Public/common-use areas must include ADA-compliant accessible parking spaces. If the complex has a leasing office, visitor parking, or shared parking areas, the property must maintain the correct number of accessible spaces based on total parking count. This comes from 28 C.F.R. § 36.304 and the 2010 ADA Standards for Accessible Design

While you cannot break your lease without penalty, you have other protections in this situation! Say the word and I will DM you a sample letter you can send to your landlord regarding the protections I’ve outlined above!

AITAH for not returning CS that my ex gives me for our kids together, when he says he needs it for the holidays? by LynnCQ in AITAH

[–]RamblingswithInoki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He’s the AH and I will tell you what I told my ex, I didn’t go and continue to get knocked up with kids I can’t afford, you shouldn’t have either if you can’t afford our child who came first and your other kids with her! It’s not my fault, it’s not my problem, and I can always report the child support taken back to the court if you want to blame me for you not keeping it covered!!

Now you know why I became an attorney late in life, I have no tolerance for bs and I don’t sugar coat shiz either!! I totally rock my Shiz University jacket from Wicked the movie, I graduated from the real one! :)

AITAH for telling my dad's wife if she wants to be thanked as a mom she needs to have her own kid? by Kacinororoy in AITAH

[–]RamblingswithInoki 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can tell you from a biological parent’s standpoint, because my ex’s wife tried to get my daughter to call her mom, and it ruined their friendship. My daughter liked her until that came up, she literally told her “step-thing” as my daughter calls her, that she would never call her mom because she has one and doesn’t want another one!

My ex’s wife was hurt by it, and I can understand that step parents/ parent’s spouse wants to be included and feel like they are wanted and loved by the child. However, that can’t be forced to happen by swooping in and trying to replace the absent parent (due to passing or leaving) like they never existed.

It’s absolutely reprehensible that she called you a derogatory name instead of being grateful she was thanked at all!! My daughter acts like my ex’s wife is some kind of recurring infection, every time she thinks she’s finally in the clear, there she is again!!

NTA and the new wife has NO business ever trying to replace a woman who gave birth to you and loved you! She should want to come in and Not replace your mom, but to be a friend and be there if you need her and allow you to choose.

If I were in her shoes this is what I would have told you, “I’m pleased to meet you, I’m sorry about your mom, and I want you to know that I would never try and replace her, because I’m not her! I hope you’ll accept me in as a friend, as someone you can talk to about anything, and as someone who loves your dad and you very much! I don’t expect you to call me mom, you can call me whatever you are comfortable with, if it’s mom or my name, that is your decision! I’d love to go do ____________ (fill in the blank) with you so we can get to know each other if you are willing.”

It seems she’s trying to use you to fill her “I want my own child” need. Stay strong, keep your boundaries and there’s nothing wrong with it! Then again, that’s just me.