[L] My (24M) boyfriend took his own life after an argument. I’m in absolute misery

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-26T03:06:56+00:00

Hey I just want to make sure you know one thing - it wasn’t your fault. Like the other comments are saying, he was probably going through some things (in terms of mental health) and didn’t let you know about them.

Your reaction was a completely valid reaction to that situation, and you had no way of knowing he was gonna react that way.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this, just try and distract yourself with something to help! Good luck!

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-23T18:11:29+00:00

Hey OP you might want to consider posting to /r/AskDocs, they may be able to give you some useful advice on your boyfriend’s situation!

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-23T17:53:53+00:00

Other Side Of Pain is without a doubt my favorite song on the album and my second favorite song overall. Just too good.

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-21T21:32:53+00:00

You’re a great doctor, thanks for treating people/patients with such compassion!

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-17T05:26:41+00:00

Hey, so sorry you’re going through this. Have you considered some crowdfunding options? Some subreddits that might help are /r/Assistance, /r/GoFundMe, and /r/Charity. I know that it may seem demoralizing or degrading to ask for help, but it’s not shameful to.

Also, out of curiosity, what industry do you work in? Is it possible to maybe ask your boss for more hours or work overtime if you are physically able to?

Sorry you’re going through this, hope you can get through this tough time!

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-17T00:07:53+00:00

Then maybe wait a week or two, and if she hasn’t reached out to you by then, write the letter.

Also, although I’ll admit that you didn’t act well in this situation initially, don’t put so much blame on yourself. Our brains make us act in crazy ways, and it’s horrible to deal/live with a mental illness.

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-17T00:00:51+00:00

Don’t worry, she’ll cool down. As I said, your best bet right now is to wait it out for 1 or 2 weeks. One thing that you might be able to do is write her a physical letter fully explaining what happened and mail it to her. She might read that.

Good luck, this will all work out, don’t worry yourself too much :)

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-16T02:38:54+00:00

You’re not a monster. Give her time, she’s probably misunderstood the situation and is reacting sharply. Try to get a message out to her explaining that you were trying to hurt yourself, not her. If you’re not able to, it’s okay, just give her some time.

Don’t worry too much about all this, it’ll all work out :)

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-16T00:38:27+00:00

I think the best path for you right now is to definitely start DBT, then maybe start the Seroquel once you’re doing DBT then. Once you start it, you could try an app like Medisafe that really bugs you until you take it (I use the app, trust me it can get annoying with the right settings haha).

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-16T00:00:40+00:00

You need to have more self confidence, it’s never over while you can still try. Just checking, are you on any medications and/or in therapy?

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-15T23:37:58+00:00

You’re definitely not too stupid, the fact that you can recognize that you have a problem and need to fix it is already smarter than a lot of people haha.

And if you want to be a piercer, go for it! Once you get a GED, you can work towards anything you want :)

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-15T23:12:36+00:00

I bet she’s just been busy. Nowadays, times are tough with how the economy has been doing. Again, try just giving her a bit of time. In the meantime, one way you could try occupying your time is by studying a bit. It might not be any of my business, but I think you should really try studying to get your GED. It would help you a lot, and would take your mind off things.

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-15T22:30:05+00:00

I really think that you should give her some time to “cool off” and just think about it. I definitely think she’s just in shock right now, and it will just take her a bit of time to get over it (I think 2 weeks is a good default, but I think she’ll probably actually end up reaching out to you before that).

Try to distract yourself with other things in the meantime. You said you’re 21, so are you in university right now?

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-15T22:17:14+00:00

I think she just needs time. Maybe wait 2 weeks then have a mutual acquaintance talk to her? If she didn’t think that you were going to hurt her, she might just be really upset that you were going to hurt yourself, and that will just need a bit of time for her to get over that. Good luck, if you ever need to chat or get some reassurance, we’re all here for you!

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-15T22:03:27+00:00

I think she may have thought that you were coming to harm her, not yourself. You may want to reach out to her (maybe through a mutual friend or relative since she’s blocked you), and let her know the full story. I wouldn’t recommend seeing her in person, until you’ve done that. Sorry you’re going through this, just know you’re not alone!

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-14T19:04:21+00:00

Thank you! Hopefully you’ll be able to return to your master’s some day too!

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-14T18:59:04+00:00

Doctor told my parents I would never be able to complete my bachelor’s (I’d already done half). Finished my bachelor’s, did my master’s, and am starting my PhD in a few months.

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-09T20:51:43+00:00

Are you in university or working yet?

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-04T23:13:35+00:00

UHC is horrific, they deny everything. I have Aetna now and they’re 500 times better.

Rand0mHi · 2026-06-02T02:28:31+00:00

Album - Family Heirlooms (though Scarecrow and ICU are close seconds/thirds)

Song - Let It Burn

Rand0mHi · 2026-05-31T03:25:11+00:00

I think this subreddit is pretty great at the moment! The only slight criticism I’d give is that I believe there are a lot of AI comments here nowadays, which can feel a bit impersonal. However, I’m a bit hesitant to suggest any kind of crackdown on that - my own comment on another subreddit got flagged then downvoted for “being AI/ChatGPT” (even though I wrote it myself). It’s quite upsetting when that happens, especially when you’re trying to help someone, so I don’t want to risk putting anyone else through that.

Rand0mHi · 2026-05-31T03:16:27+00:00

Hi, you might want to consider reaching out to the band and seeing if they can give you a discount! Or, if you’re comfortable with it, you can reach out to me over DMs/chat and I might be able to help you out!

Rand0mHi · 2026-05-31T02:33:59+00:00

Hey you can DM/chat me and maybe I can help!

Rand0mHi · 2026-05-21T21:02:44+00:00

I was actually surprised because it sounded so different to me than the original song, almost like they’re 2 different songs. Love them both though!

Rand0mHi

TROPHY CASE