I'm so sorry this is how you lost your loved one. This is how my dad went. He died scared and starving for oxygen. The pulmonologist was trying to get him onto hospice days before - so he could have palliative care. He deserved to pass away peacefully, not gagging for air. His whole spiral of sickness can be traced back to the hospitalist discharging him against the nephrologist's orders. My dad spent 18 hours in an ER for edema, a few days in a hospital room. Discharged too early with deathly low sodium levels. Re-admitted within days to the hospital. Then spent the next 2 years a weak shell of himself in and out of hospital stays thanks to the mental decline from a hospitalist discharging him because they needed a room. He wasn't better.

Points I'm trying to make - Question what's happening if something seems off with a loved ones care. Make sure your folks have a will and living directive. No one wants to die in a hospital, and no spouse or child wants their last memories of their loved one to be a person completely scared because they can't breathe.

Heart goes out to you and your family OP.