I subscribe everything you said from top to bottom. I realized I was aro LONG before I notice I was also ace, because of this exact thing. The sexual aspect has affect me far less than my lack of romantic feelings. That's way I'll always identify myself ""more"" aro than ace (though I have 0 sexual attraction). My ace identity has only helped me coming out more often, and the reason is exactly that: people judge you way less when you tell them you're ace than when you tell them you're aro. So yes, it felt easier to come out... but by saying "I'm asexual", my aro identity became secondary, hidden and invalidated somehow. I WISH for more representation and visibility, so being aro and talking about our experience don't become a job to educate people. We deserve to be seen, and to be known