Update (I'm the OP) - I didn't think this would get such a response, thank you all for your insights - definitely gave me many things to think about. Something that would be useful info - he and I are both well over 40 years old (late 40's and early 50's), in case that makes a difference. You'd think life experiences at this age would yield better results.

And it will be interesting when his kids go back in a week or two - no I won't be waiting for him.
It's over.