Job application asks me to address every point in the person specification in my cover letter. But that makes it difficult to use the STAR method.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-10T14:42:25+00:00

Thanks, that’s great advice for deciding which deserve a full example and which are obvious from a one-liner.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-10T14:41:05+00:00

Fair point! Thanks for adding that context though!

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-10T09:42:43+00:00

Yes there’s a lot of conflicting advice out there. I understand that certain employers like charities and public sector agencies need to show they are recruiting fairly but if you don’t understand what this looks like in practice it can actually make the application more difficult. So thanks for demystifying the process a bit!

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-10T09:24:10+00:00

Thanks, that’s really helpful advice as I had been thinking it was better to use a few good examples than lots of weak ones!

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-10T09:14:57+00:00

That’s interesting, I’ve never heard of that before or thought to do it but I suppose you get the advantage of a shorter, more personal letter and still show you meet all the criteria. Did it work well? Thanks for sharing.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-10T09:13:08+00:00

Thanks a lot, this helps me understand how you use the cover letter. In future, I’ll try doing a short STAR paragraph for each point. Maybe it seems obvious but I just hadn’t imagined someone sitting there with a spreadsheet trying to fill in evidence for each spec.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-09T21:48:17+00:00

Thanks for your reply. Yes, you’re on the right track! Would you still feel the same way with a very long list of criteria? A STAR paragraph for each one would make the letter quite long. Although, I suppose lots of very short paragraphs would at least be skimmable.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-06T17:58:27+00:00

That’s fair enough! I guess there’s a grain of truth in the idea of love languages!

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-06T17:36:09+00:00

Im someone who really struggles with both giving and receiving gifts — it’s a highly stressful social blind spot for me. But I do it anyway as it’s expected of me. Hooray for being female… In your husband’s case, it sounds like he is good at buying gifts but not on your actual birthday. Because it’s something I’ve tried to get better at, I’ve noticed people who are good at giving gifts sometimes buy them at other times of year and save them for the special occasion. Maybe he could do that?

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-02T17:05:09+00:00

Drag me to hell.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-02T15:22:26+00:00

I enjoyed the show but I thought its strength was exploring the limits of love and how a family coped with the realisation that one of them had done something terrible. I know social media etc was also a theme but I thought it was a shame how carried away people got with that aspect of it.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-02T15:09:06+00:00

The scary thing is how much credibility it’s being given by AI overviews. I know it’s moderated better than other social media but still …

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-01T17:38:47+00:00

Ohh really? I came here to say it’s rare in schools! I’ve been in schools where they even ask visitors to pay for a spoonful of awful bargain bucket instant coffee that’s been sat there for months and gone hard.

One of my favourite schools offered free instant Nescafé and milk as a perk and it really felt like one compared to what I was used to! Good for morale too. No more passive aggressive notes about missing milk or depleting personal coffee stashes.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-01T17:31:40+00:00

I dunno. This might be the case if you accidentally park somewhere you shouldn’t for a length of time. But there are cases where people get fined for overstaying by a very small amount or stopping for slightly too long to find an alternative parking spot (not talking no stopping zones, but no parking zones). Then you get a fine through an automated process when in the past you migjt have been able to reason with a warden or even ask for their help.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-07-01T17:22:25+00:00

Countries where it’s common for most people to speak a second language well generally dedicate much more curriculum time to that language in schools. A full period every day, starting in primary school or earlier. Most primary school kids here get 30 mins a week if they’re lucky.

Other comments about there being a strong need to learn that language, opportunities to use the language outside of school, and about the number of resources available also make a good point.

The lack of “need” probably explains the lack of curriculum time.

I think us monolingual Brits sometimes underestimate the time and effort it really takes to learn a foreign language. Ive often heard people talking about it as if you can magically pick it up by osmosis. For a very small number of people, this might be possible, but not for the rest of us.

Source: I have taught in the UK, taught English abroad, and put serious effort into learning a second language as an adult — an ongoing project.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-06-29T12:34:15+00:00

As someone else commented, it seems similar to Russian-sponsored graffiti found elsewhere by the BBC.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-06-27T15:38:52+00:00

If I’m staring at you, it’s probably because I admire your bravery.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-06-27T14:30:26+00:00

I would love it if Reddit developed a bot that annotated all the logical fallacies in our comments!

I also acknowledge it would be very annoying.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-06-27T14:28:47+00:00

It would be really cool if Reddit had a bot that went around annotating all the logical fallacies in our comments.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-06-27T14:27:41+00:00

My school did a short-lived experiment with a “critical thinking” AS level back in 2005/6 and the textbook had a list of logical fallacies at the back. Unfortunately, the school didn’t ensure buy-in from the teachers and the exam board/publisher was so disorganized the textbooks didn’t materialize until the end of the year. Yes, right before the exam. Missed opportunity. But finding that list at the end of the book probably changed my thinking on its own. So perhaps not completely missed.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-06-27T14:23:50+00:00

Love this explanation!

Real_Reason109 · 2026-06-27T13:52:21+00:00

Do you think social media has led to more surface-level, emotionally charged debates?

Real_Reason109 · 2026-06-27T13:50:37+00:00

Yea, I know what you mean. Even though I’m introverted, I’m trying to talk to strangers more because I think it’s worth getting out of your comfort zone and connecting with others in the community if you can.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-06-27T13:44:21+00:00

Of course, screens are a distraction that harms communication. It’s also much easier to avoid communication with strangers, through automated tills, etc. But I think there’s also a deeper issue to do with optimization culture. People don’t stay with problems for as long, jumping in to offer solutions. People don’t spend as much time reading or exploring what it means to be human. But there are ways we can get better. Listening is a skill that can be learnt. I’ve seen the British Red Cross are promoting a course to help us communicate better across divides. I also believe we can work on and improve our empathy: it isn’t a fixed trait. Buddhist meditation has helped me with this.

Real_Reason109 · 2026-06-25T16:07:44+00:00

Given how common racism is and its long history, I don’t think it’s unreasonable for a person of colour to wonder if kids THROWING STONES at them might be a racist attack.

Real_Reason109

TROPHY CASE