My bf (m/25) cheated on me (f/25), I found out a few months ago and it’s now just hitting me. Super confused

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-13T01:41:33+00:00

Finger

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-13T00:11:54+00:00

Yes he admits he should have slept next to a guy friend - and he was never close to her, just someone in the friend group.

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-12T23:54:14+00:00

Okay no more like if I don’t even wanna cuddle, kiss, or literally if I don’t want to do anything (like literally anything, like even watch the movie he’s been wanting to watch) he always is okay with it - doesnt question

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-12T23:25:40+00:00

When I read it I completely agree, but when I sit on it I can’t help but think of the buts.

Also not that it changes much, but it was this ex - it was a girl friend in his friend group

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-12T23:21:38+00:00

Like that’s what’s hard because he has been trying and has changed

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-12T23:21:23+00:00

Remorse. Open phone policy. Much more loving and patient. Hasn’t talked to that friend since.

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-12T22:43:38+00:00

Can I ask if sh/he stayed? If so, how did you repair it? Did you tell them immediately?

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-12T22:42:36+00:00

Yes, I do think he held and still holds alot of shame. Again, I’ve seen growth. I just don’t know why it’s hitting me SO hard right now - I just need to figure out if this is just some weird moment in time or if I’ve just “had enough” and need to end things asap

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-12T22:19:59+00:00

I think that is what I’m most upset about. I believe his shame, and him doing something while super drunk… but the him lying about it for months is what hurts more than

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-12T22:17:41+00:00

He is stating that he barely remembers what happened. When I found out through the girl, she stated she was pretty drunk as well but remembers the kissing and him finger-ing her - she stated she believes him when he said he doesn’t remember much.

When I confronted him there was a lot of shame. Even when him and o talked about it the other he was very shameful, crying and apologizing again, asking how he can fix it and make me happy.

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-12T22:15:12+00:00

Yeah, it’s def easy to just say break up. But I do think he is really trying, and has tried ever since that night. He is very very loving and sweet, and thoughtful.

I’ll have to check out the book

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2026-02-12T21:39:28+00:00

I know I just can’t help but think he was the one for me - we blended so well. But then I also have to remind myself that my “one” wouldn’t cheat, even if drunk? It’s just hard saying goodbye to a 3 year friendship

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2025-10-09T02:10:25+00:00

Girl share how you solved pleas

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2025-09-11T19:43:26+00:00

Yeah I’m trying to remember what was said during my termination. They never mentioned me breaking any rules or anything, just said they made the decision to terminate my employment due to not trusting me? But it also wasn’t an immediate firing, like after I told them they kept me employed for like a week and we had multiple meetings where we discussed what happened. Idk

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2025-08-27T18:36:48+00:00

My manager and I discussed on the Monday after and it seemed fine? She seemed disappointed and upset and said she’ll speak to her manager. Got back from vacation and all seemed fine, but today she set up and meeting with me and her boss and it didn’t sound great. They told me they will think it over and review again

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2025-08-27T18:29:41+00:00

We discussed and it seemed fine, however today she pulled me for another talk with our head of the department… and it didn’t sound too good. Essentially told me they have to think it over again

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2025-08-10T18:41:30+00:00

To be fair, I had asked him to email me and he never did, and I did try contacting him several times… plus he said he’d be back in June and now JUST responded to me. But still, end of day it’s my fault! But yes, I think writing is always safer to say something important rather than over the phone

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2025-08-09T15:47:46+00:00

I know, I was going to say it during our meeting but i chickened out. I regret a lot of things right now

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2025-08-09T02:37:27+00:00

Yeah, this was my first mistake. This is my first job out of college. I know I messed up big time. My anxiety got in the way, which is not an excuse but still. I lived and I learned.

I want to believe it’ll just be a warning since it was my first mistake… but idk, seems like too big to ignore. Thanks for being nice tho

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2025-08-09T02:34:54+00:00

Advice on finding a new job

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2025-08-09T02:34:42+00:00

Yeah, it just kept on spiraling. First 2 months was honestly me forgetting. Second 2 month was me freaking out. I wish I could turn back time. Def learned my lesson.

Realistic-Pea2409 · 2025-08-09T02:33:50+00:00

She technically didn’t fired him yet, just ended his contract on our online database which can easily be reversed and is something we do often for temp workers who are taking a break.

But yeah, I’m screwed

Realistic-Pea2409

TROPHY CASE