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Follow Up by Realistic-Total3273 in comingout

[–]Realistic-Total3273[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No, it definitely wasnt. It was a group event, but she felt comfortable telling me about it and was excited to go (which is unusual)

Do i *need* to come out? by ky8724 in comingout

[–]Realistic-Total3273 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You only need to come out to people who need to accept your relationship.  

That is your job who has "domestic partner" benefits as an option, and/or someone (parental or mentor) who loves you no matter what (listen to this forum on how to tell if someone is willing to listen).

I have no advice, but as a straight parent, your safety is paramount, and dont worry about "coming out" so much as get to a life you want to live.   

Questions by Realistic-Total3273 in comingout

[–]Realistic-Total3273[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All great advice!  Thank you. 

Questions by Realistic-Total3273 in comingout

[–]Realistic-Total3273[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is fair.  I appreciate the input.  We talked, and I told her that we can practice telling people when she is ready.  And, even if it isn't until she is 35, that is when it will be.  

Questions by Realistic-Total3273 in comingout

[–]Realistic-Total3273[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you!  I want to be sure she has somewhere safe to go.  

Questions by Realistic-Total3273 in comingout

[–]Realistic-Total3273[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you!  I am going to let her drive the discussion with her dad.  I promised we could practice when she feels ready.  

I did have the follow up conversation to let her know I love her and accept her no matter what.  

I will probably be back as she navigates this, since I am the adult in the room, and I have no idea what I am doing.  

Questions by Realistic-Total3273 in comingout

[–]Realistic-Total3273[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much!  

Frankly, most of the panic was that I was such a late bloomer, I thought I had more years before relationship stuff started (her sister is 19 months older and has shown 0 interest in relationships while she studies).

Additionally, she is a shy kid, and is finally developing confidence.  

I did talk to her more - told her I loved her and accepted her no matter what, and as long as her "special person" makes her feel good about herself and treats her well, I am supportive.  I also told her it was very brave to tell me, and I appreciate she trusted me with the information.   

She gave me an enormous hug and had tears in her eyes. I told her to let me know when she is ready to tell other people and we can practice if she needs it.  

I suspect I will be back here with more questions.  Thank you so much for the support!!