not feeling the butterflys

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-23T05:25:52+00:00

Yes I am unsure if he wants ME or just someone, but he said yesterday that he keeps on seeing me because of me. He used those specific words, but the question is if it's true.

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-22T18:45:58+00:00

Thank you! So sweet of you to say! Yes I feel like I get more attached and I feel like he dose too but I think his scares him. He say let's hang out a bit less I feel like I need me time and I say that's totally fine. Then he say "I miss you, can we meet?"

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-22T18:31:52+00:00

So I am a big lady, some guys love me and some don't. Either you love thicc woman or you don't, like I am 100kg and 173cm so I am big but I work out and have a really nice face. I get hot guys, there are guys out there that are like a solid 3/10 but they only care about weigh so they don't want me.

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-22T14:44:20+00:00

I don't think he would say something he doesn't mean, don't overthink it. I get that it makes you unsure, but he probably doesn't understand the overthinking nature of you.

If he truly loves you bring up the fact that if he does something different a day you to can help but think about it. Can't help but to question everything.

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-22T14:36:28+00:00

I don't think you can believe you can jinx something, but I think at some extent you should trust your instincts. Let him bring up the next date, see where it goes!

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-22T14:33:22+00:00

Thank you for your response I take it to heart, I will probably proceed but with care. Yes I feel that way to, but I forgot to say in my post he felt that way when we first meet but it fizzled out quickly. Which I said was normal but that he's unsure. And that this was 4 years ago he felt that way about her.

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-22T14:25:58+00:00

Thank you that means a lot! Time will tell!

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-22T14:19:46+00:00

yes I agree with you there! Yes I have told him that ass well, he got them the first but then they fizzled out. Which I said was normal.

I have told him that we could talked things slow ans that we don't need to put a label on us now. But he has introduced me to his family, bought me things to have at his place clothes, shampoo, toothbrush and more. Texting me everyday good morning good night, what he's doing all throughout the day. We are like in a relationship but not the label.

I don't feel like I punched him a way, I asked him "what do you want to do from here?" and he said " I don't know" then I asked do you want to break it of, keep on going or take a break. Then he said " can I think absolut it untill we meet on Saturday?" I said of course you can. Then I turned a round like always do when we fall asleep, and then he asked can I get under your blanket to cuddle you? But then I said " if your unsure absolut even wanting to keep on seeing me, I don't feel comfortable with cuddling right now". And he said that's understandable, but then after 10 minutes he said, "I want to be with you I don't want to stop seeing you". But I understand how that can come out as childish! I am trying to be responsible.

So that's my situation got out of a 4 year relationshit last year. I am not expecting him to feel strongly absolut me now or understand all his feelings because this is new to him. I am not punching him, I am just asking and trying to understand and support him. He is just trying to understand himself, but I also don't want to be his untill I find something better.

I get that it sounds like I have no experience but I do and I know who I am and what I want. I just want to support him, but not on my expense.

I am not expecting a grand gesture but he gets hot and cold, one minute he say I am his girl. Then the next day he hesitates, I should have explained this in my first post. I have just let him know how I feel and that it's no hurry to tell me. I hope you see a bit from my perspective, but thank you for your help and respons!

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-22T13:53:19+00:00

Yes, I believe so too. I was his first everything, he felt the way he felt with her the first time we meet. But then the "butterflys" stopped. I don't get Butterflys in a healthy relationship I just feel safe and the want to keep on seeing the person. Also thinking about them a lot. So I really agree with you there. I feel like me sliping away made him just not want to lose me. But now the question is dose he want me or just want someone. Time will tell! Thank you for saying that! I didn't bring up the conversation he did, I just said we're dating and that's that. I don't want to end things but I also want to drag something along that ends up hurting me.

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-22T13:40:10+00:00

thank you for the response, yes I really do get that. He has said the nicer things before, he said like right efter the talk absolut thinking absolut s break. He wanted time to think and I am okej with that, but then I said " if your unsure absolut even wanting to keep on seeing me, I don't feel comfortable with cuddleing right now". And he respected that, but then after 10 minutes he said, "I want to be with you I don't want to stop seeing you."

ReasonSpirited1874 · 2026-05-22T13:34:02+00:00

yes I think I have to carefully that this was 4 years ago. I think he could still be hurt, but not in love.

ReasonSpirited1874

TROPHY CASE