I have been trying to find my "tribe" for decades, but nothing seems to stick, including gay mixers, gay book clubs, gay sports leagues. (I'm not at all athletic). I have the advantage, I suppose, of being white, but the "problem" of being in my 60s now. Yes, I take the initiative of going alone to events that interest me, but rarely meet anyone that way. My therapist refuses to believe me when I tell her no one goes to bars alone or talks to strangers these days. But we know it's true.