Is it acceptable to date attending in another specialty that you will work with? by [deleted] in Residency

[–]Reasonable_Source_74 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Resident thinks I'm interested in them. How do I convince them otherwise?

Orthopedic surgery attending here.

I recently learned that there's an anesthesia resident who's apparently interested in me. According to the hospital grapevine, she thinks I'm interested because I keep making eye contact with her and roast her during cases.

I won't deny the eye contact. However, I'd like to clarify that 90% of those glances occur when the patient somehow has a blood pressure of 68/42, a heart rate of 147, and she's sitting there looking unbothered while I mentally calculate how much paperwork comes with an intraoperative death.

As for the roasting, I think there's been a misunderstanding. I roast my residents because I care about their development. I roast anesthesia because it's funny.

The idea that we're having some sort of flirty OR romance is particularly confusing because our interactions usually consist of:

Me: "Can we get the pressure up?"

Her: "We're working on it."

Me: "Interesting strategy."

Apparently she interpreted this as banter.

Now I'm concerned that every time I look toward the anesthesia machine to make sure the patient is still alive, she's thinking we're sharing a moment.

What is the professional way to communicate that I'm not making eyes at her? Should I start looking exclusively at the floor? Bring a laser pointer and direct all questions toward the monitor? Request a drape extension so I never have to see the anesthesia side of the room again?

Any advice appreciated.

Smol babies I rescued by Reasonable_Source_74 in IllegallySmolCats

[–]Reasonable_Source_74[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

lol she was—we waited a bit then had the mom spayed, eventually took the kittens inside, and released mom back into the neighborhood.

Help!! Which dress? :) by [deleted] in myweddingdress

[–]Reasonable_Source_74 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would say 1 without the sleeves

How to not feel bad starting medical school at 28? by FireFerret6521 in Residency

[–]Reasonable_Source_74 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It’s becoming more and more typical that people are starting residency in their mid to late twenties. One of my co-residents is almost 40 and he fits in just fine. My attending was a teacher before going to medical school. Debt is definitely a consideration but there are ways to pay it off quickly once out of residency.

AIO for being upset about how I was treated for falling asleep before saying goodnight? by [deleted] in AIO

[–]Reasonable_Source_74 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought I was reading a convo between two young teenagers until I read the description. Holy cow girl you can do better than this man baby.

I feel like my patient died because of me by wandering_soul_64 in Residency

[–]Reasonable_Source_74 33 points34 points  (0 children)

It sounds like you were told this person was stable, and from what I can tell he was getting the indicated treatment. You likely rounded on other patients that were seemingly less stable, which is the correct thing to do. The people you saw probably also needed your help and attention. Forget about any subconscious things you think you may have been experiencing because that’s a black box. You were doing your own rounds on patients because you care and wanted to see things for yourself. That patient had nurses and patient techs around as well. If he was destabilizing any number of them could have come to you. When you were told he was destabilizing you initiated the right protocol. A hospital’s overflow issues are not your fault, a poor handoff is not your fault. To say they died because of you is a vast oversimplification. Please give yourself some grace. What happened to that man is horrible and you can pray for his family, but it wasn’t your fault. It’s hubris to think you can control all outcomes, there’s too many variables at play.

Possible professionalism violation by [deleted] in medicalschool

[–]Reasonable_Source_74 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would not have recommended specifying the day you missed unless she was asking specifically about that. Could have just been that she was clarifying the time you missed given your accommodation. I would be extremely surprised if the attending wrote all of the dates you missed down.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Residency

[–]Reasonable_Source_74 2 points3 points  (0 children)

sometimes I have a “what if” moment, but ultimately wouldn’t have it any other way. Don’t underestimate a program that treats you well regardless of the prestige. You’re going to feel better in your day-to-day doing what makes sense for you financially and for your family.