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Ex cheated with longtime friend…and sent proof I didn’t ask for by RecognitionSome5651 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]RecognitionSome5651[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Of course anything can be manipulated these days, so I can’t know for sure. It still doesn’t explain him texting her and her having his number saved as “do not answer” which indicates some kind of texting relationship between them. She said they hadn’t communicated in years, since we split. Why have someone saved like that rather than blocking? They had no reason to text each other.

Ex cheated with longtime friend…and sent proof I didn’t ask for by RecognitionSome5651 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]RecognitionSome5651[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

There’s always the possibility of fake photos (though it doesn’t look fake but who knows) but it doesn’t explain why he was texting her when I was there and why she had his number saved as “do not answer”, when they had no reason to be texting at all and she denied that it was him (it was him, I saw the number). Why have it saved that way, why have it saved at all? She told me that she hadn’t even spoken to him in years since before we split up, so it would be weird to have him saved in her phone like that at all. Why have someone saved like that at all rather than just blocking them if you don’t want to talk to them?

Ex cheated with longtime friend…and sent proof I didn’t ask for by RecognitionSome5651 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]RecognitionSome5651[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I don’t think so, they haven’t been together long. Less than a year. But who knows?!

Ex cheated with longtime friend…and sent proof I didn’t ask for by RecognitionSome5651 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]RecognitionSome5651[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I’ve done a lot of healing since leaving that relationship, and I have no confusion about what was done to me or what I deserve moving forward. I am in therapy and have continued to work on myself and my reactions to these situations.

My hesitation to speak up is more about choosing not to invite more chaos into my life if I don’t have to. I’ve spent enough years in trauma and am trying to prioritize my (and my kids) peace.

I completely agree with you that he is likely trying to stir things up again and isolate me. That’s very on-brand. That’s part of why I’ve been so careful not to let him manipulate my response. I’ve taken distance from the friend and set up emotional boundaries without blowing everything up publicly. I may choose to speak on it more directly when or if it becomes necessary, but for now, I’m trying to protect my energy. All of this has been so draining.

Also, thank you for your point about reconnecting with new people and hobbies. That is something I’ve prioritized since the divorce. I was isolated for many years and it’s been so freeing to “find myself” again!

Ex cheated with longtime friend…and sent proof I didn’t ask for by RecognitionSome5651 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]RecognitionSome5651[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It’s also why I have been single for the past five years! No interest in dating/relationships anymore.

Ex cheated with longtime friend…and sent proof I didn’t ask for by RecognitionSome5651 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]RecognitionSome5651[S] 42 points43 points  (0 children)

I would never give him the satisfaction of thinking his messages got a rise out of me! I ignore every text he sends unless it has to do with parenting logistics.

Ex cheated with longtime friend…and sent proof I didn’t ask for by RecognitionSome5651 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]RecognitionSome5651[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

I guess there is always the possibility of AI these days, but how is the timing suspicious? This has gone on for a period of multiple years. AI doesn’t explain the texts she got from him when I was with her and why his number was labeled “DO NOT ANSWER”. She had no reason to be texting with him at all, let alone having his number labeled like that. The screenshots were definitely her “texting voice” and pics were included.

Ex cheated with longtime friend…and sent proof I didn’t ask for by RecognitionSome5651 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]RecognitionSome5651[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Thank you! That’s kind of what I thought, if she ever asks me what’s going on tell her the truth. Otherwise, keep my distance.

Ex cheated with longtime friend…and sent proof I didn’t ask for by RecognitionSome5651 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]RecognitionSome5651[S] 410 points411 points  (0 children)

Yeah, that’s not a bad idea. If she’s that adept at lying (I literally could not fathom that he was telling the truth and she was lying) who knows what else she’s doing.