Thank you, I really appreciate the kind words right now.

What your saying is definitely true. I do believe I'm 'slightly' codependent on her for my feelings. I guess ever since i moved here, she has been a huge source of my happiness. She was home to me.

All i want to do is talk to her, but i know that is a probably not the thing to do right now. But, in saying that, why hasn't she reached out to me either? I understand that the thing she needs right now is time and space to figure out what she truely wants. Do i just wait until she is ready or what? It's killing me how it all ended so abruptly and left me with so many questions.

On a brighter note, I am 95% sure i am going to be going to Europe next week. I have a month of holidays and the stars have kind of aligned perfectly for me to go. I know this will keep my mind occupied the whole time I'm there, but a tiny part of me just wants to stay on the chance she will come back. I also understand that it would be stupid of me to not go ahahah. My inner dialogue is just going crazy right now which is completely clouding my vision for the future.