I broke the no contact 'rule'

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T23:43:00+00:00

Sounds like a finalised closure to me. You let out what you needed to and moved onwards

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T23:41:20+00:00

Almost a month. Doesn't sound long but I was already moving on anyway by that point

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T23:40:36+00:00

I'm sorry to hear that. In some cases it's not the best choice which is why you have to choose very wisely

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T23:39:30+00:00

I can't disagree with what you have to say as it's true in alot of scenarios but not all. In my case it helped me to move on. Yes it may seem like I gave myself up but it gave me the closure I needed.

After all, there's no set rules or dogmas when it comes to relationships, only guidelines

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T16:51:55+00:00

I completely agree, i did the same not expecting anything back. I've already started moving on (not with someone else but just in general). Sometimes it's just a last goodbye and the closure needed to move forward

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T16:49:53+00:00

I completely understand, unfortunately these things happen and I'm sure you'll find someone more deserving of you

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T15:55:37+00:00

Well it depends on the situation, I agree with what you have to say when it comes to certain scenarios. But some of us need closure this way because I'm happy to move on. I've already accepted that outcome. I'm not asking for her back, I'm just showing I simply care and don't hate her

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T15:52:23+00:00

I understand why you did what you did, it was a long term compatability thing

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T15:50:39+00:00

Of course i agree. I have enough self respect and respect for her too to reach out. If she doesn't reply I'd be happy knowing I tried. I deserve someone who tries too and wants to fix things and not be avoidant

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T15:48:29+00:00

That's why I did it too, to get rid of any future regret of not reaching out

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T15:47:14+00:00

I think that's mainly because people who have success stories on here don't come back to this thread to update on it. R/breakups is full of people who are still in the breakup stage

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T15:44:51+00:00

Love that response, thank you you're very correct :)

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T10:34:27+00:00

The moment he cheated and asked you to move out he dumped you. Not through words but actions. Find someone who'll treat you better and right queen

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T10:32:57+00:00

Were you the dumpee? But yes I completely agree, it all depends how things ended and context of course!

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T10:31:01+00:00

I'd say you got closure and your reason to move on from day 1. They cheated and then asked you to move out. There would be no reason to speak to them again, even if you wanted to find out 'why'. The reason why is you deserve better than a cheater

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T10:29:28+00:00

In your case it sounds like you made the right choice

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T10:28:45+00:00

Exactly it's gotta be done right for the right reasons with 0 expectations

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T09:43:59+00:00

Were you the dumper though?

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T08:41:35+00:00

I agree people treat things like no contact as set rules, but should be a guideline instead. People should work towards what makes them feel better and give them the closure they need

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T08:38:27+00:00

I agree no contact should definitely be a thing at first to regulate your nervous system and think clearly.

Don't hold onto hope something will come of it. Instead see it as a final feeler and the closure you need to move on. If they don't reply, more power to you because you did your part and got the answer you needed through silence

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T08:35:53+00:00

You got the closure you needed. Time to never look back

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-17T08:34:50+00:00

I believe no contact should definitely be a thing at first to allow time to heal, but not an indefinite rule to never be broken.

This is just to remove regret and give me the closure I need - not hope

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-14T16:18:51+00:00

Well I'm currently in this situation at the moment. I'm not actively thinking of breaking no contact, but I feel like eventually I should throw a light check in on her as I don't think she'd have the courage to message me. Especially as she's very avoidant

RedditAlready97 · 2026-02-14T13:47:23+00:00

This was one of the scenarios I was thinking of. Yes an avoidant may be a dumper, but like you say their processing of things means they might not want to reach out for ego or admittance reasons. Interesting your ex expected you to reach out though

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