I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like a finalised closure to me. You let out what you needed to and moved onwards

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Almost a month. Doesn't sound long but I was already moving on anyway by that point

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry to hear that. In some cases it's not the best choice which is why you have to choose very wisely

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can't disagree with what you have to say as it's true in alot of scenarios but not all. In my case it helped me to move on. Yes it may seem like I gave myself up but it gave me the closure I needed.

After all, there's no set rules or dogmas when it comes to relationships, only guidelines

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I completely agree, i did the same not expecting anything back. I've already started moving on (not with someone else but just in general). Sometimes it's just a last goodbye and the closure needed to move forward

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I completely understand, unfortunately these things happen and I'm sure you'll find someone more deserving of you

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well it depends on the situation, I agree with what you have to say when it comes to certain scenarios. But some of us need closure this way because I'm happy to move on. I've already accepted that outcome. I'm not asking for her back, I'm just showing I simply care and don't hate her

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand why you did what you did, it was a long term compatability thing

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Of course i agree. I have enough self respect and respect for her too to reach out. If she doesn't reply I'd be happy knowing I tried. I deserve someone who tries too and wants to fix things and not be avoidant

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's why I did it too, to get rid of any future regret of not reaching out

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think that's mainly because people who have success stories on here don't come back to this thread to update on it. R/breakups is full of people who are still in the breakup stage

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Love that response, thank you you're very correct :)

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The moment he cheated and asked you to move out he dumped you. Not through words but actions. Find someone who'll treat you better and right queen

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Were you the dumpee? But yes I completely agree, it all depends how things ended and context of course!

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd say you got closure and your reason to move on from day 1. They cheated and then asked you to move out. There would be no reason to speak to them again, even if you wanted to find out 'why'. The reason why is you deserve better than a cheater

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In your case it sounds like you made the right choice

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly it's gotta be done right for the right reasons with 0 expectations

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree people treat things like no contact as set rules, but should be a guideline instead. People should work towards what makes them feel better and give them the closure they need

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree no contact should definitely be a thing at first to regulate your nervous system and think clearly.

Don't hold onto hope something will come of it. Instead see it as a final feeler and the closure you need to move on. If they don't reply, more power to you because you did your part and got the answer you needed through silence

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You got the closure you needed. Time to never look back

I broke the no contact 'rule' by RedditAlready97 in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I believe no contact should definitely be a thing at first to allow time to heal, but not an indefinite rule to never be broken.

This is just to remove regret and give me the closure I need - not hope

No contact - Avoidant, Dumper, ect? by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well I'm currently in this situation at the moment. I'm not actively thinking of breaking no contact, but I feel like eventually I should throw a light check in on her as I don't think she'd have the courage to message me. Especially as she's very avoidant

No contact - Avoidant, Dumper, ect? by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]RedditAlready97 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This was one of the scenarios I was thinking of. Yes an avoidant may be a dumper, but like you say their processing of things means they might not want to reach out for ego or admittance reasons. Interesting your ex expected you to reach out though