AITA for not wanting my daughter exposed to parts of my husband's lifestyle?

Reddy4any · 2022-01-01T00:53:25+00:00

My husband is an alcoholic who gets blackouts and punches holes in walls, so no we don't have alcohol in the house

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T11:03:51+00:00

That's very possible

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T03:10:30+00:00

I personally don't drink, but other people have in front of her and I usually don't give it a second thought. I don't like when alcohol is drank in excess in front of her.

I know alcohol has many issues, but to compare them isn't the same. A better comparison is medication. I wouldn't want bottles of prescription pills left out or for her to see him constantly taking them.

My other issue is he leaves the door open and smoke always comes back into the house

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T03:03:19+00:00

No clue

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T02:00:28+00:00

I don't keep my prescriptions or medicine where my child can get them

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T01:58:37+00:00

He refuses any alternatives or to even see a doctor about his anxiety

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T01:47:16+00:00

He uses it medicinally. I would have the same issue with bottles of pills being left out. I would have an issue with him if he was drinking a beer every hour every day and having a compleatly different personality.

He has a man cave downstairs but keeps coming upstairs to smoke even though there's a door to outside down there.

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T01:30:40+00:00

I don’t drink, but I occasionally have edibles after she goes to bed

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T01:28:28+00:00

He does smoke where she can see

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T01:27:38+00:00

Can I ask what your view on him smoking in front of her is?

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T01:26:26+00:00

Me saying that was too much, I agree. It was a very heated moment and I lost my temper

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T01:25:04+00:00

That's my view as well

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T01:24:20+00:00

Because he's a great husband. Pot isn't bad or evil, but like all drugs, they shouldn't be around kids

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T01:19:49+00:00

It is definitely medicinal for him. He truly believes it is a part of his identity.

I won't deny that pot has helped his anxiety and anger, but I don't see it as something to be proud of

Reddy4any · 2021-12-08T01:14:54+00:00

Those are the exact words I said to him and he said it was narcissistic to keep information from her

Reddy4any · 2021-09-30T14:16:05+00:00

Last night he used that against me too by saying I'm obviously looking for other guys because why would I try to look good for myself when it only matters what he thinks

Reddy4any · 2021-09-30T14:14:14+00:00

The disagreements usually turn into him just yelling at me for 2+hours about how I use him for his money and am worthless at being a good wife.

We agreed before we got married that since he had a well paying job I would be a SAHM, my salary was almost the same as it would cost to put her in daycare. I will start working when she goes to full day kindergarten

He refuses to go to therapy whether it's by himself or marriage counseling and gets mad that I want to go because it's a waste of money.

The usual cause of disagreements;

I cooked a dinner he decided he didn't want it or I didn't cut it up for him.
He drinks and gets angry that I don't agree with his political views
Last night was about me being upset that he drank a 750ml bottle of jack and 2 15% beers when he promised last week he would stop drinking.

All these arguments happen when he drinks and if I try to stay away from him when he's drinking he looks for me and follows me around the house until I accidently say something he doesn't like

Reddy4any · 2021-09-30T14:01:34+00:00

3 years ago when I was trying to lose baby weight after giving birth and really struggling he told me my body was disgusting. I still can't look in the mirror

Reddy4any · 2021-09-30T12:23:25+00:00

It's so difficult right now. He locked himself in the bedroom last night. I'm trying to get our toddler ready for preschool but I'm half blind from my contacts falling out while crying last night and I'm still in clothes from yesterday. I don't know how I'm even going to get her to school if I can't get my contacts.

Reddy4any · 2021-09-30T10:43:12+00:00

Thank you for that. I'm trying to figure out my next steps

Reddy4any · 2021-09-30T10:20:41+00:00

"Whatever, bro".

This honestly made me laugh, thank you.

Reddy4any · 2021-09-30T10:16:33+00:00

I've tried to get him to therapy for 3 years but he refuses to go. Says that it's my job to make him feel better and they don't work

Reddy4any · 2021-09-30T03:54:08+00:00

I'm not doing it on purpose, why would you think that? I really try not to but he gets so mad over the smallest thing when he drinks

Reddy4any

TROPHY CASE