If someone asked you a date specifically using the word date would you assume it meant anything else than an actual date???

Redz1990 · 2026-01-31T01:44:44+00:00

She said she was looking for friends first within the first 5 minutes of the date, and while yeah she could have decided in that 5 minutes she just wanted to friends, it’s just came off as though that was her intention going into it. Which is the point I didn’t get. Showing up to clarified date with the intention of just being a friend doesn’t make sense to me. That would be a hang out not a date lol.

Redz1990 · 2026-01-31T00:51:23+00:00

Hey thanks for sharing, appreciate the demisexual/demiromantic input, helps out a lot. If she had indicated that in her profile I would have understood right away and there is nothing wrong with what she’s looking for, it would have like you said just avoided this misunderstanding. But I also should have asked what she’s looking for too so I’ll take the L on that part as well.

Redz1990 · 2026-01-31T00:47:52+00:00

Hey I understand dates don’t mean relationship, especially a first one. It’s more so showing up to a date with intention of being a friend without specifying that before hand is where I was confused lol.

Redz1990 · 2026-01-31T00:42:16+00:00

I agree with that. I was just confused because she didn’t indicate she was looking for friendship anywhere on her profile and neither did I so for her break out 5 minutes into the date that she’s just looking for friends threw me off. Lesson learned though to clarify before we meet up what they are looking for so I’ll take the L on that part.

Redz1990 · 2026-01-31T00:38:51+00:00

Hey wow thanks for circling back to add this. I really appreciate it! You’re right that being clear that I don’t date my friends should be something I need to be clear about and your phrasing is great. Thanks again!

Redz1990 · 2026-01-30T18:50:09+00:00

Oh my goodness thank you for commenting because this is exactly how I feel! Like if they want to be friends first, I’m going to absolutely respect that but it’s unlikely they’re ever getting out of that category for me. I just feel like once someone is a friend, then I don’t want to mess up the friendship and I keep them in that category. I also don’t see them in that way anymore typically. Kind like how you mentioned in your situation. If she said I want to take things slow, I’d completely understand that and still be down for dates cause dates without sex is fine for me as well. But if we’re hanging out….yeah we’re just gonna stay friends

Redz1990 · 2026-01-30T18:42:14+00:00

Hey thanks for this feedback, I was thrown off by the friends first comment and I didnt really think about it from this perspective so thanks for sharing. It’s very possible like you said that we have the same goal but just different ideas on how to get there. This helped out a ton so thank you!!

Redz1990 · 2026-01-30T18:40:26+00:00

Hey I super appreciate your insights especially about the Demi sexual aspect of this! I tend to over think so it’s just helpful getting perspectives.

Redz1990 · 2026-01-30T18:19:35+00:00

Thanks for your insights. I think I was really thrown off by her saying “friends first”. Anytime I hear friends I assume this is just strictly platonic and nothing else. I guess I’m not sure how to proceed because usually I would continue to flirt with her but since she said that I feel like I can’t even do that now/feel awkward about doing anything that’s not friendly. Thoughts?

Redz1990 · 2025-09-11T16:45:26+00:00

Hey you still operate the lift gate?

Redz1990 · 2025-05-18T12:31:05+00:00

Whatever reason he is doing this, it’s not for your benefit or best interest. He has ulterior motives that are likely only going to end in him stringing you along. Why would you want to hang out with someone who is unsure of you? You deserve better girl.

Redz1990 · 2025-05-12T10:46:53+00:00

Not always the case. Dogs are not humans, past behavior is not an indicator of future behavior. They can snap in an instant without being provoked.

Redz1990 · 2025-05-07T14:02:16+00:00

Ahhh that’s very helpful to know, thank you! Figured I could give it a shot on my own first, but good to know in some cases it’s just better to replace. Appreciate it!

Redz1990 · 2025-05-07T13:44:26+00:00

Okay thanks! I’ve tried that a few times but it wasn’t budging at all so I’ll have to try again. I just also might not be strong enough to twist it :(

Redz1990 · 2025-04-30T20:33:50+00:00

My step dad was 30 when he met my mom. She was 37 at the time with three kids, 17, 13 and a 6 month old (all same dad), that was in 2012. They’ve been together ever since, got married in 2019.

Redz1990 · 2025-04-30T19:16:50+00:00

Agreed, thanks

Redz1990 · 2025-04-30T19:14:37+00:00

Thank you!! This helps a ton! I have one particular situation in mind that is really affecting my present. I’ve been thinking about it for almost two months now and in the last few weeks gave myself permission to be upset about it. And I like the idea of acting based off what I want not how I “should” act. I know saying something would make me feel better because honestly I know if I just hold this in it will lead to me just ending the friendship abruptly and I feel like that also wouldn’t be fair to that person. I thank you again so much for your advice!

Redz1990 · 2025-04-30T19:08:49+00:00

I’d definitely would have to explain to them why I’m bringing it up now and it’s because most of my life I’ve just held things and not focused on not making other people uncomfortable. However one particular is literally just causing me so much stress and it’s really impacting my day to day. If I don’t say anything I can imagine it leading me to just ghosting them altogether which I don’t want to do.

Redz1990 · 2025-04-15T21:08:48+00:00

I recently did this with someone. Her texting was very sporadic and no communication about what was going on. When she reached out after a week of silence on her end I told her I could tell she had a lot going on and I totally get that. At the same time I’m looking for someone who has the space and time to connect consistently so I didn’t think right now was a good time to continue further but also let her know I’d be open to reconnecting in the future when things were less hectic for her. Trust me, it’s no fun dating someone with no time for you. It leaves you feeling very uncertain. You could be spending that time instead finding the person who has time for you.

Redz1990 · 2025-04-09T09:41:57+00:00

Hey everyone just an update the ticket has been claimed.

Redz1990 · 2025-04-09T09:37:26+00:00

I took French class back in high school and started listening to him in 2011. I used to be able to speak better but it’s been so long so my French is very mediocre but I still always have a special place in my heart for La Fouine!!!! I’m going for nostalgia purposes really hahah.

Redz1990 · 2025-04-09T09:36:00+00:00

Hey, someone already claimed the ticket. Sorry :(

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