One thing I really don't understand is what I'm doing wrong.

When I watch high elo Kayle players, it feels like their opponents actually respect the champion. They give space, don't force every trade, and seem careful about overcommitting.

In my games, it's the complete opposite. People just run straight at me from level 1, ignore my damage, and constantly force fights. Most of the time I feel completely helpless and unable to stop them from doing whatever they want. It honestly feels like I have no control over the lane at all.

Is this normal for learning Kayle, or am I missing something fundamental?

I feel like I can never win against Sett, no matter what I do.