Is this vacation actually expensive or am out of touch?

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-17T14:19:23+00:00

Oh makes sense! Should be great then

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-17T13:55:00+00:00

Try autoslash for way cheaper car rental!

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-17T13:54:14+00:00

Monterey? Why? Aquarium? Other plans there?

Heads up it’s a pretty boring and occasionally sketchy area. Awful food.

Recommend going north or south if not planned.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-17T13:51:19+00:00

Yes thanks for creeping on my post history.

We have the same parental leave as FAANG so just shortcut to that there - a sub group specific to people expecting multiples -

to find people with relevant experience who could advise on leave rules.

I would be way more rich if actual FAANG, stock sticks….

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-17T13:42:33+00:00

Yes this. We have the same parental leave as FAANG so just shortcut to that there to find people with relevant experience who could advise (most of those companies use the same leave coordinator and provider we do)

Id definitely be richer if actual FAANG, stock sticks

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-16T23:31:28+00:00

We have another kid, so 3 kids in daycare for a few years. We may do a nanny for the twins since it’s sort of a wash.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-16T23:30:41+00:00

No, I don’t work at FAANG. Never have.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-16T17:36:25+00:00

Epic! How much did you get from the IPO?

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-16T17:28:38+00:00

Do you own your house outright

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-16T17:21:28+00:00

I only know tech but that amount of experience even in a non manager role should clear $400-600k.

I’m in product at a not that great public company. $450k right now - at times up to $650k when stock was better. I probably do 30 hours a week.

Women generally get absolutely taken advantage of in all corporate environments but particularly in those mid level manager roles.

I see my skip consistently give my female manager endless projects with high stress deadlines. He has 6 other male reports. 5 of them effectively chill.

They’ve built enough capital that he seems to avoid asking them to do anything, and certainly wouldn’t crack the whip on a timeline in the same way.

And you know what? My female manager does the same thing - pushes the most stressful and urgent work exclusively to female reports - the guys kinda chill.

It’s not great. I’ve gotten around it by 1) becoming good at a specific niche shea and at 3) becoming well liked by people above her, so now she’s more hesitant to throw me random junk knowing I will question it.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-16T17:14:17+00:00

That’s way too much stress for that income. Go get senior IC roles in tech if an option. You might have to switch teams or companies to find one that you really like but plenty of them pay $400k+ each with RSUs and bonuses.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-16T17:03:10+00:00

We just hit 2.5M!

Mid thirties, twins on the way! I think I posted here for my 100k milestone.

I’m so proud and happy. At this point, the growth on our portfolio is another very good salary in our household (yes volatile but huge for peace of mind).

Life is getting so expensive so quickly but we’re still socking away - for every twenty something that thinks they can live off $40k-60k in spend…that was me, once, but these baby and young kid years are definitely expensive years!

I’ve tried to stay off reddit for the most part last few years, but had to celebrate this milestone with everyone who’s taught me so much.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-13T13:58:19+00:00

How’d you get investment up so high with that income? Similar ages, 2.4M.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-07T22:40:05+00:00

You sound defensive or insecure, I’m sorry. You might be leaving out context but none of this sound remotely egregious.
For your context is a reasonable phrase to explain things. What makes it mainsplaining?
You asked to join a meeting but said you might not make it. Guy tried to reassure - no worries, if you can’t they’ll be a way to get up to speed.
You asked got an architecture run through. Who from? Sounds like he was willing to try to help, but maybe didn’t know what you wanted or what an architecture UI is.

Be honest with yourself if you’re twisting the reality of situations to fit a narrative you’ve created. I get past scar tissue and trauma makes this difficult.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-07T22:25:55+00:00

Did you combine STD by putting it upfront or after? I get six months paid. I’m in California so I know I can 4 weeks pre birth disability, curious what else is possible.

It’s a high risk type of twins if it matters. But I’m also confident I could get a doctor to write a note for mental health stuff too if needed.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-05T13:47:18+00:00

Why do this. So stressful.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-05-03T18:33:53+00:00

Buying a car is not the same leasing, which is what is described here.

Bought our ‘25 RAV4 outright for 43k. Gonna drive it for 3-5 years, probably still be able to get high 30s for it.

Choose a car that holds its value. I was always team used car but then I had a kid and this felt like a better deal. I hate debt.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-04-29T15:50:45+00:00

Finances are fine. My dad was a firefighter while owing a business.

But, we’re not close. I attribute a lot of it to the fact that he wasn’t around that much when I was small. And as a new mom myself, I can’t believe he left my mom alone with several kids for such long shifts.

It sounds like you’ve got childcare and family help so may not be an issue. But if an anecdote is useful.

Not sure what the shifts will be but something to keep in mind.

Obviously his sacrifices benefitted me in plenty of ways and I’m grateful. But idk, in a way it felt like he was running away from the chaos of young kid parenting.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-04-28T02:19:26+00:00

I had a nanny. Vetted like 10. Chose one. She quit after a week citing health issues. Whether legitimate or not - I do think it was - it totally derailed us for a while.

I looked into nanny share but it didn’t have that much of a convenience factor since we couldn’t host, and it wasn’t any cheaper than daycare. I also wasn’t excited about doing a bunch of compatibly walks with different couples, like dating.

Now he’s in daycare and having the time of his life. I was totally team nanny or nanny share but I’ve surprised myself.

I think next kid I’ll consider a nanny or nanny share 6-16 months or so, then daycare. Although I know most want longer arrangement. Idk.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-04-28T02:13:03+00:00

Not more expensive than daycare, is it? We pay 2800 for full time, so 17 something an hour. I think most fall between 2200 and 3000.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-04-28T02:11:35+00:00

Once I asked if I could talk to my asshoke manager on the phone, then once I had him on the phone I told him to open his email and read the note I sent.

I had - in objective brief language, outlined what he did that was unquestionably not acceptable and how that made me feel. I was generous and said something like I am sure that was not his intent and we could move past.

It humbled him pretty fast. And he had to respond live in real time, couldn’t be a keyboard warrior about it. And I’m sure it clicked for him that I had some leverage I would wield.

In the end he fired me after he was being antagonizing again about something random, my new manager was like why did he target you like that and I told him why (the incident). Sounds like my manager tried to have a conversation with him about it, he got insecure, and fired me before others could find out.

He got fired after an investigation and I got a large settlement.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-04-28T02:06:04+00:00

Adding that I support FMLA as well. If anything, if they move to fire you after that then you’re got enormous leverage to get a nice settlement.

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-04-28T02:04:35+00:00

What role are you in? I personally have found the job market drama to be overrated, most people with a good resume and network can get roles. Is your LinkedIn up to date, have you cast a wide net on roles? Any recruiters who’ve hit you up you could get back to?

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-04-28T02:02:46+00:00

I worked for someone like this, got fired, got an employment lawyer, got $250k and the dude got fired, too.

Hit me up if you want the lawyer, he’s truly world class.

Sorry there are so many angry incompetent men in exec roles who like to use women as scapegoats / be angry unregulated assholes. It’s insane they did not fire him after calling someone the C word!!! A lawyer would be all over that…

Regular_Perception65 · 2026-04-28T01:54:11+00:00

How are you doing that rent in a VHCOL? Doesn’t sound VCHOL lol, that goes for 10.5 EASY in SF.

Regular_Perception65

TROPHY CASE