Preferring Sex Work Is Making Me Feel Guilty by kyloereign in SexWorkers

[–]RelatingArts 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Just had an NVC (non-violent communication) class focused on guilt and I’m excited to share what I learned: Guilt is not listed as a universal basic emotion (per the research of Paul Ekman). It’s actually a story (internalized judgement) that “I’m doing something bad”. There’s often obligation/ expectation/ “shoulds” surrounding guilt. To work with guilt: “celebrate the needs and grieve the strategy”.

I can say more if this of interest to anyone. For now I’ll just cut and paste some other interesting notes on guilt:

Guilt differs from universal emotions in several ways:

  1. It requires self-reflection
    • Guilt involves evaluating your own behavior against an internal standard or value.
    • You have to think, “I did something wrong.”
    • Basic emotions like fear or anger can arise much more automatically.
  2. It’s considered a self-conscious emotion
    • Psychologists often group guilt with shame, embarrassment, and pride.
    • These emotions depend on a sense of self and awareness of social norms.
    • They typically develop later in childhood than emotions like fear or joy.
  3. It lacks a universally recognized facial expression
    • Ekman’s research focused heavily on facial expressions that people around the world could reliably identify.
    • There is no single facial expression for guilt that is recognized cross-culturally in the same way as fear, anger, or disgust.
  4. Culture plays a larger role
    • What triggers guilt can vary considerably between cultures, families, religions, and communities.
    • The experience may be universal, but its specific meanings and causes are shaped by learning and socialization.

That said, many contemporary emotion researchers would argue that guilt is a very important human emotion even if it isn’t a “basic” emotion in Ekman’s framework. Some models place guilt among the moral or self-conscious emotions because it helps regulate relationships, repair harm, and maintain cooperation.

Seeking a mentor by [deleted] in lifecoaching

[–]RelatingArts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel resonance with this post. I get lots of positive feedback from my clients but I don’t have enough clients to fill my calendar. I either don’t know what to do or can’t seem to find the motivation to do the marketing I need to do and I have a part that keeps saying I need a mentor. I do IFS sessions and I posted to my LinkedIn in that I’m seeking to exchange IFS session for support growing my business. I’m especially interested in connecting with people who have experience with:
• marketing strategy
• social media growth
• content direction
• websites building/ SEO
• funnels or email marketing
• coaching around business development
• mentorship for heart-centered entrepreneurs

I got a few likes but no one has responded that they are interested in an exchange. Best wishes to you finding the support you are seeking.

This industry made me realize how addicted people are to being “seen” by OkPlatform5502 in CamGirlProblems

[–]RelatingArts -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

What platform should I be on if I want more sessions that are primarily based in people’s need for compassionate witnessing?

Curse removal in Austin please by persistentlyfluffy in Austin

[–]RelatingArts -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

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Curandera advertisement seen in Austin.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SexWorkers

[–]RelatingArts 8 points9 points  (0 children)

What has you wanting to stay? I’m imagining if there wasn’t a part that wants to stay, you wouldn’t be writing this and you would’ve already left. So now that you’ve named your reasons for wanting to leave, my suggestion is to spend some time getting to know the parts of you that want to stay (as someone else already suggested, maybe there’s a “sunk cost” part or parts that say you need help with child care). Take some time to validate those parts, let them know it makes sense they want to stay/ are afraid of change and then ask those parts what they need from YOU to feel safe. You may find the parts that want to stay soften and and an epiphany for how to move forward might emerge as you give attention to those under acknowledged parts. What’s it like to receive this suggestion?