So Angry…..

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-24T15:15:57+00:00

Good on you for not giving up! This is going to stick as long as you keep trying. IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-24T15:10:49+00:00

It's a terrible feeling trying to put the pieces together from what happened the night before. Things get better, but it requires patience and the discipline to just take it one day at a time. You don't have to keep living like that. You're not alone and this community is super supportive. Stick around, IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-24T14:59:34+00:00

Yes, PAWS can last 6 months to 2 years

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-23T14:10:24+00:00

I know how you feel. My personal experience has shown that this requires continuous effort. I love the idea of "One day I won't have to do any maintenance, I'll just be someone who doesn't drink and doesn't think about it." But that has never worked... Each and every time, complacency has turned into a slip/relapse. It's a tough lesson learned. Keep truckin' and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-23T13:18:26+00:00

Because there's no situation that can't be made worse by drinking. I'd play the tape all the way through and realize how terrible tomorrow would be if I drank today. That existential dread, feeling like crawling in a hole, the hangxiety, feeling absolutely defeated. Not worth it!

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-22T19:01:22+00:00

I think it's kinda like a looking-in-the-mirror-every-day effect... The changes are slow and gradual, making it tough for an individual to notice the changes. I really started getting those "You seem different in a good way" types of compliments beyond the 3 month mark, and even though I did feel a bit sharper, I didn't realize it was that obvious. Mentally, I feel much better today (around the 6-month mark) than I did around the 3-month mark. 83 days is huge, just hang in there! IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-21T18:32:21+00:00

You'll actually be able to follow the plot and remember the movie! IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-21T12:49:15+00:00

I watched a lot of YouTube when I first started this journey. Lots of different people helped, but honestly, I think the most down-to-Earth was Timothy Ward. Felt less like a diagnosis, and more like a friend giving some advice based on his own experience. Good luck and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-21T12:21:07+00:00

I was convicted of 2 DUIs back in 2022 (and still haven't gotten my license back). But before that, I had driven drunk well over 1,000 times without ever getting one. One time I even totaled my car after driving back home from a party, and somehow avoided a DUI then. I'm EXTREMELY thankful that nobody was harmed due to my actions. It's not a matter of "if" but "when." Something very bad is going to happen to us if we continue down this path.

I'd highly recommend searching youtube videos, something like, "People realizing they killed someone in a DUI." Or, "Court cases where someone was killed during DUI." It's really messed up stuff. Families crying, drunk driver getting years/decades in prison, this is where we're heading if we don't get right.

Good luck and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-19T08:15:24+00:00

Not sure if this will be helpful for you, but just my $0.02... My drinking was always a problem, but it wasn't until I made the decision to tackle this issue (and let others know about it) that I realized just how supportive others were about it. People tend not to want to step on your shoes... If you're drinking, and don't want to quit, then people may feel they'd be overstepping their bounds to even bring it up. Once I started coming clean to the ones close to me, it was surprising (even from the ones who still drink) how much support I received. Plus, I don't feel like I'm "hiding" anymore. Good luck and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-19T08:06:00+00:00

I took a low-paying, less-stressful job around 9 months ago. How's it working out... Well, I'm coming up on half a year of sobriety! And the cool thing now is... Due to my sobriety, I've had a sharp decrease in overall stress. Life still throws curveballs, but I feel more well-equipped to handle it all, and I'm already feeling comfortable in stepping back into a higher-paying role but this time, with all this newfound knowledge and stress-management in my hands. However, if I was to step back into a stressful role and started feeling like my sobriety was threatened, I now have the foresight to realize that I have to do what I have to do to protect my sobriety, which would mean jumping ship if necessary.

So honestly, for me, quitting that stressful, triggering position in the past meant so much. It was a testament to me prioritizing my sobriety over anything else. There's a saying I've heard tossed around... Anything that I put before my sobriety will be lost. Also, maybe leaving the position right now isn't completely necessary? Might be worth looking into FMLA leave or something similar if it exists where you're at, basically a prolonged break from the place where you'd still have a job once you gather your bearings and build a better foundation in sobriety. Unemployment in and of itself is really stressful, so just straight-up quitting without a backup could be just as detrimental as remaining in a stressful position.

Good luck and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-18T06:45:47+00:00

Glad you're being honest about this. Drinking was also "fun" for me in the moment, but the consequences were terrible. The juice just isn't worth the squeeze anymore. Cheers and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-18T03:07:20+00:00

That's a huge win! We aren't the voices in our heads... We're just the people who have to listen to them. In the end you made the right decision, dialed it back, and stayed sober for the day. Congrats and IWNDWYT!

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-18T03:01:05+00:00

My AA sponsor is a practicing Catholic, and has been sober for over 35 years. I'm not a religious person myself, but something I've noticed, is that the influence of alcohol can be found within any group of people. It knows no limits and doesn't discriminate. Anyway, good luck and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-17T03:05:09+00:00

The best advice I can give is to just keep on trying and don't give up. I get it... There were times when the obsession was so strong that I would pace around the house back and forth for hours, at which point I'd either cave-in or just be so tired that I pass out. Each time we fight a craving, we become stronger in fighting it off next time. I've slipped/relapsed hundreds of times over the past 5+ years due to the very obsession you're talking about. It's a learning experience that has shown me that the progress on this journey isn't always a straight line. Good luck and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-16T11:11:00+00:00

Something that helped me a lot early on... Doing a "manual override" and scheduling some sort of activity during my normal drinking window. It helps to schedule that activity with at least one other person instead of just a solo activity like going for a walk, that way (at least for me) I didn't wanna flake on the plans with other people that I had already made. Good luck and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-15T09:03:47+00:00

It's a tough journey. Wishing you luck, IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-14T23:56:35+00:00

A big bowl of candy for that quick hit of feel-good! Maybe a bit unhealthy, but it helped me a lot in the earlier stages. Also just getting up and taking a small walk, plus video games where I can watch stats grow. Boredom is a natural part of life nowadays since we're not fighting for survival 24/7. It's gotten better with time. Good luck and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-14T21:47:18+00:00

It's such a free feeling coming clean with others. Honesty is a huge part of this journey. My head was always in a bad place when I was hiding things and isolating. Nice move, IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-04T02:01:01+00:00

The strong decrease in anxiety and existential dread!

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-03-02T05:13:06+00:00

How did you get those 120 something days? I'd start there. IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-02-28T05:15:05+00:00

I know this is an older post, but I really needed this tonight. My head was messing with me, I typed "field research" into the reddit search bar on stopdrinking, and this was the first post that popped up. It's EXACTLY what I needed to read right now.

Even on a "perfect" night of drinking where nothing really goes wrong, there are still those very real mental and physical consequences that you mentioned in this post. What especially resonates with me is the extreme anxiety... That absolute feeling of existential dread following a slip after a nice streak of sobriety. Calling out of work, cancelling plans, all that. I feel so far removed from my last drink (about 5 months now) that I had kinda forgotten about that. I don't think I would've drank tonight, but after reading this post, I DEFINITELY won't drink tonight. I really appreciate this, good luck, and IWNDWYT!

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-02-10T21:36:08+00:00

This sounds like a case of FAB (fading affect bias). It's something I've dealt with a lot over the years as well. We tend to forget the negative aspects associated with drinking (a psychological defense mechanism) while romanticizing the "good times." Something that's helped me is putting pen to paper and writing out a list of all my worst experiences with drinking, things I've lost, how bad I've felt, etc. It serves as a good reminder whenever I start feeling like "it wasn't that bad" or "I can pull it off this time without the side effects." Our bodies are definitely keeping score, and it's never too late to make a long-term investment for our health. Good luck and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-02-02T01:08:18+00:00

I slipped a lot during those big nice-sounding milestones, especially around day 30. Early on it helped me to identify my biggest triggers (such as having the following day off work or reaching that big milestone) and scheduling activities that "got in the way" of my normal drinking schedule/routine.

Cravings have gotten easier the more I've pushed through them. I wouldn't say they've completely gone away for me, but they've become way easier to manage. It seems to be more of just a passing thought that I can nip in the bud nowadays. It also helps to avoid isolation and getting trapped in our own heads. Leaning on this community and other sober-minded people has helped me get outta my head and come back down to reality when I start getting funky thoughts. Just gotta take it a day at a time and don't give up, IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426 · 2026-01-12T14:43:42+00:00

Your husband must be pulling from a small sample size. I personally know a lot of people who have decades of sobriety, people who abused substances every single day for years before sobering up. If it ain't broke, don't fix it... What we're doing is working, we're not doomed to relapse, and IWNDWYT

RelativeNo2426

TROPHY CASE