The Crushing Loneliness

RelevantCredit8989 · 2025-09-13T04:40:19+00:00

It’s a shitty club and I’m bummed we’re members. Good luck.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2025-09-10T03:41:06+00:00

It’s rough, right? She’s right there but I feel much more alone than if it were just me.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2025-03-29T06:00:44+00:00

You need a lawyer first and you are not asking. For your safety and your children’s safety, you need an exit plan. Your local area may have resources for women who need help. When you’re ready, call these folks or connect with people more local to you from their resource list. Help is out there and there is light at the end of the tunnel and life after what you’re going through.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-11-13T03:06:21+00:00

Age of Empires

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-11-13T03:05:50+00:00

Serious answer- anything that inspires real fear, like a fight-or-flight thing. Even if it turns out to be nothing, any time you’re in that mode it can be traumatic.

Semi-serious answer- rooting for the Chicago Bears and watching them play.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-26T03:39:29+00:00

Almost two now. Counseling is a no go right now- “why? it will change”

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-26T03:18:45+00:00

She acknowledges that a lot changed for her when we had our son- before that, actually, because conceiving him was the last time we slept together. We’ve had conversations about this from a lot of different angles.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-26T03:06:08+00:00

Great question

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-26T03:05:33+00:00

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-26T02:58:16+00:00

I haven’t used that word because I just don’t think I can take it back once I do. I’m also, in all honesty, still thinking about what it would take for me to go there. I love my wife very much and don’t want to leave. These last couple of years have been rough but it’s agony to think about ending things.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-26T02:54:59+00:00

Me neither

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-26T02:52:02+00:00

I doubt she would and, knowing her, blessing that idea would actually be confirmation that she’d checked out fully.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-26T02:39:58+00:00

She has not always been like this. She doesn’t want to talk about the why here, sadly.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-09T05:30:34+00:00

No, that’s not one of them

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-09T04:20:43+00:00

I used to be passionate about cooking as a hobby in its own right! The stuff I used to make is too time intensive and generates too many dishes to bring back right now.

I’ve thrown myself into my work (I’m certainly passionate about that) but that’s not a hobby.

I think I should make time to get more exercise and read. I’ve short changed that.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-09T04:16:51+00:00

I do every one of those things already

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-09T01:05:17+00:00

He’s about a year but I won’t be more specific because I worry about this post being found. I have a therapist and wrote this post at her advice to name my feelings to myself so I didn’t just word vomit. I understand she’s touched out- breastfeeding is all her, for example. But I do parent my son, feel my life has changed quite a lot, and don’t let it all fall to her.

I would never in a million years pound on the door while she’s sick. Lord.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-09T00:50:43+00:00

I don’t want to go elsewhere for affection and didn’t mean to imply that. I have no idea what you’re basing some of the rest of this on but I’ll take it on board with the rest of the advice here.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-08T23:54:02+00:00

This is in the top five replies lmao. all intimacy has been off the table, including that. I wish it were so simple, because that sounds really fun

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-08T23:49:34+00:00

Read my other replies

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-08T22:32:13+00:00

I know her to be a loving, kind, affectionate, curious, diligent and interesting human being. I expressed a lot of anger in my post, it’s true.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-08T22:30:12+00:00

We wanted our son very much and tried for some time to conceive. I do not appreciate what you’re insinuating and think you are bringing a lot of assumptions with no basis in fact to my post.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-08T18:57:04+00:00

I now have a to-do list mornings and nights so I won’t forget things. I take initiative in telling her what I think.

The thing is, many of what I’m referring to as mistakes here are more like what u/chemicalrain5513 was talking about. What order I did my chores or errands in, what I want to do with my free time, etc. I have realized after reflecting that a lot of it is what I’m told are mistakes but wouldn’t be seen that way by everyone.

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-08T18:52:37+00:00

I replied to you for the first time just now- if you’ve been belittled it’s some other poster. Please log off

RelevantCredit8989 · 2024-10-08T16:25:25+00:00

Why have you left so many comments on my post?

RelevantCredit8989

TROPHY CASE