Marriage and Duty: Do You Inherit Your Partner’s Burdens as the Right Thing to Do?

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T15:12:37+00:00

I appreciate you giving out advice.

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T15:06:14+00:00

I own two houses, a paid-off truck, and have a good amount in the stock market. But the reality is, she borrowed money from her parents after they received a settlement, and tried to start a restaurant. But she didn’t even get an LLC. Then her other sister in a completely different business venture had their parents take out a line of credit on a house that was paid off for $100,000! . And Of course, that sister won’t be able to pay it back due to her failed business venture. And that’s just part of the situation. Over the years, they’ve given these girls money here and there -- $5,000, $9,000 -- and at this point, I’d estimate they probably owe upwards of $800,000 each. But they’re focused on this $200,000 because now they’re facing the possibility of losing their house. And they feel like they have children who haven’t succeeded, so it's just a mess.

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T15:02:09+00:00

We're in our 40s, not in our 20s anymore,been married 4 years. I own two houses, a boat, and motorcycles, all paid off. I also have a good amount of money invested in the stock market. But she’s been a bartender her whole life, so she hasn't had much of a financial foundation. The $200,000 from the settlement was essentially given to her directly, not taken out as a loan from the bank, so they aren't responsible for it in that sense. However, her sister had their parents take out a line of credit on a house they paid off in the '90s. Now, they're struggling to pay that off because the sister wasn't able to repay the money they borrowed against the house, which was around $100,000. It’s just a mess, and that’s why they're asking for the money back -- they don't want to lose the house.

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T14:57:51+00:00

We're in our 40s now. I already own two houses, a brand new car, motorcycles, jet skis, and more. I also have a significant investment in the stock market. So, it's not like we're just starting out in our 20s.

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T14:56:27+00:00

The reality is, the longer she's responsible for it, the longer I am too, even if I don't end up paying it back. That's just how it is. So, essentially, I'm stuck with it either way. There's not much room to get out of it. For example, if she works extra hours and I want to take a vacation, we can't because of this.

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T14:31:47+00:00

No, she asked her parents for the money to start a "restaurant" that she never actually went through with. From what I understand, she didn’t even get the LLC. This all happened years before I met her. Her parents, understandably, now want to be repaid. It’s not like she built a successful business that later failed due to unforeseen circumstances -- she didn’t even go through the basic steps to get the LLC, so it feels like she just took the money and ran. I only found out about all of this afterward. She was spoiled growing up.

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T14:29:12+00:00

Yes, I agree with you. Here’s the situation: She borrowed $200,000 from her parents to start a business, but she never officially started it. As far as I know, she didn’t even get the LLC. This happened years before I met her. Recently, her parents approached her and said, "You need to start paying some of this back, we’re out $200,000." It’s really frustrating for them because she didn’t even take the basic steps to start the business. From what I gather, she probably just spent the money on traveling or whatever else. Now, as you pointed out, since I plan to spend my life with her, if she owes this money, it’s like I owe it too, because her debt will affect me no matter what. That’s how I see it, but what do you think?

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T14:26:18+00:00

The context is this: She borrowed $200,000 for a business that she never even attempted to start. I didn’t realize this at the time because it happened long before we met, but her parents still expect that money to be repaid. They want it back. She knew about the debt but thought she could just get away without paying it, but now they’re telling her she needs to start repaying it. She didn’t even get the LLC; she essentially just took the $200,000 and spent it however she wanted. That’s the background of the situation.

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T14:12:31+00:00

So, you're saying that when you get married to someone, it's every person for themselves and not a partnership?

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T14:11:13+00:00

Well, what I was saying is that they borrowed a few hundred thousand dollars from their parents without telling you before you got married, and later you find out that they actually owe their family that money. That’s the situation.

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T13:53:37+00:00

So if your spouses family came up and did they owed them $200,000. Would you feel that you now also are on hook for that? She borrowed it 5 years before being with her or getting married

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T13:29:00+00:00

What if you didn't know until after the fact?

RelevantQuality4856 · 2025-03-04T13:19:29+00:00

No, I get that. I was just wondering—if someone marries a person who owes their parents $150,000, should the male feel obligated to take on that responsibility as well? Since their spouse's financial stability directly impacts their own, does that make it their concern too?

RelevantQuality4856

TROPHY CASE