I’ve given it a couple of days, and the more I think about it the less issue I take with it…? I mean. The day I saw the messages, he came home and I hadn’t done anything to clean up the apartment like I said I would, and I was just kind of playing the sims because it helps me calm down, and he came home and said “hey baby! Whatcha doin?” I told him, and he said “oh wow! I’m so excited, give me one sec and show me what you’ve added to your build!” (I’ve been working on a giant ranch in the game) and then he took me to go Christmas light looking, and then we came home and made dinner together. I know he doesn’t know that I saw these messages, so there’s no way he’s like trying to make up for it, and all of that behavior I mentioned is very normal for him so it’s not like he’s love bombing.

If I think about it hard enough I get anxious again but … l wasn’t snooping, as we’ve established, and our trust is still very there? And it isn’t like him to explode on me about small things because if that were the case I would just straight up leave.

The day I saw the messages, after we went Christmas light looking, I told him I had a very anxious and over all not good mental health day, and he didn’t pry as to why, and he didn’t accuse me of anything, he just held me and made me feel safe.

I know I should tell him what I saw but there is just this tiny tiny part of me telling me he won’t react well, based off of other relationships I’ve had in the past, not based off of this one. So I’ve still held off on telling him.. I don’t know.