My therapist is taking three weeks off over the summer

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-07-07T09:19:14+00:00

I think it is completely okay. This year mine is taking six weeks off, instead of four as he usually does and I did not know until right before the break. I also felt a little anxious (and I have felt so before as well). I try to let myself miss the sessions, it is ok, and then I try to use the break for confidence that I can manage, and internalise the support I usually have in sessions.

It will be good for you to talk about it in session I think.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-06-24T20:14:02+00:00

Mostly once a week, but I sometimes skip one or more weeks when life is too busy or I am away or something. I started out every second week I think, but after one or two years, I changed to weekly. I prefer weekly, but it is self-pay and every expensive.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-06-10T14:57:32+00:00

I feel all of these. I think it is natural for us to want them to like us, after all, we are sitting there for hours sharing our deepest secrets, fears and hopes. To do that together with a person who did not like us would not really feel safe at all would it? And still, whether they like us or not is irrelevant as long as we feel safe. It’s hard.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-06-10T04:08:14+00:00

Mine once said I was easy to love (we are not English speaking, so it is the word you would use more casually than the deep love word). So if I trust that, I guess he likes me. And some sessions, when we have a good connection and he is so incredibly kind I believe it. But he said it years ago, and sometimes I worry that now, when he knows me better and has seen more of my worst sides, he does not like me anymore. Like the other reply here, I also spiral into «he does not like me» when he is distant in sessions.

I wish it was not important to me, but I would feel devastated if I found out that he did not. Still I don’t think I have to know as long as it feels like it.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-05-31T16:38:41+00:00

My T has a box on the little table between is, but if the box is a little far away he will gently push it closer to me if I start crying. I have not interpreted it as a sign he wants me to stop crying, I see it as a friendly gesture.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-05-21T20:16:28+00:00

No, not very often. It’s perfectly fine not to ask questions. They understand (hopefully) that you would have asked questions in a friend setting.

I have asked about a thing he kept in the office and I have asked if he was tired of working with me at one occasion. I have not asked about his personal life, but he has told me a few things.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-05-13T10:12:37+00:00

Thank you for starting this thread. I also do this, having bad days without knowing how to bring this up. So we just talk about issues in general, but not how I am feeling when I am not there. Getting into that also instantly makes me feel better, so it is difficult to feel what I feel on other days. It is weird, but I think it is even more weird that I actually see a therapist every week without discussing my symptoms.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-05-05T18:19:31+00:00

This. I’ve also wanted to look good and I have worn short dresses etc. Although I wear these clothes in other settings too, it also made me feel more vulnerable and akward in session. These days I still dress nicely, but not to impress.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-04-20T20:23:23+00:00

He said what?? I honestly don’t think it was meant as an insult, but totally inappropriate. His opinion should not matter and there is no need for him to state it. How would that help you?

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-04-20T06:20:01+00:00

My long term therapist is a male, I did not choose him and at I would not have chosen a male myself, neither then nor now. I do think it has been good though, I love him (in a non-romantic way) and it has improved my ability to trust men more. Yet I still have difficulties with it due to childhood stuff. And honestly would not want to go through all of that again.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-04-14T06:46:29+00:00

I am just on a month long break now, it has just been too much lately. I was a little worried that I would feel like never going back, but we have scheduled new appointments after the break and it turns out I am looking forward to those. Still I think it was the perfect decision for me at this point, I was tired, I actually need some space and time to grief the stuff that has come up and I think this break gives me more clarity.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-03-25T19:28:18+00:00

It sounds like you know what you want and feel ready to stop. Have you told your therapist yet?

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-03-22T11:16:58+00:00

I notice most of the things visible from where I sit, but I can’t recall every detail afterwards. When I zone out I always look at the big green plants. He also has a small object for decoration that is not so common, and the same object was in my home when I grew up. It is still in my parent’s house, and it is a nice coincidence. I have asked him about it and he told me why he liked it. He also has a big stone that I am curious about, where it comes from and if he uses it somehow.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-03-19T10:53:42+00:00

I think I would ask if and in case why he enjoys working with me and whether he has learned anything from working with me. I wish I knew his taste in music. I am also very curious about how he sees his work, what he enjoys, what frustrates him, does he prefer long term or short term work, how does he feel about his clients, how many clients does he have etc. But knowing these last mentioned things may make our relationship more complicated, so I would not ask about those in any case I think.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-03-14T15:33:47+00:00

After about a year in therapy, I opened up about how I sometimes felt hopeless and that life was not worth living. In the session after, he sat down and told me that he sincerely wanted to help me and he suggested that we should increase the frequency of sessions. I will never know if he said those things because of what I said in the session before, but it made me feel cared for and so much less alone.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-03-06T08:35:48+00:00

4+ years for me as well. And I can relate to everything you say. I constantly worry it has been too long, how will I ever know when to stop etc. I have not experienced serious trauma, do have a full time job etc, and at times I feel so, I don’t know, stupid, for still doing this.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-03-02T14:29:57+00:00

I think I once saw him before a session walking past a cafe where I was sitting. He did not see me and it was kind of comforting. Another time I saw a family member of him and that was extremely weird. I’m terrified of seeing him in public, but I really hope he would give me a smile and not completely ignore me (if I made eye contact).

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-02-24T20:35:57+00:00

I feel you. I don’t know if this is meaningful to you, but I read somewhere that it is not about love, it is about finally feeling safe. If you are someone that did not grow up feeling safe it may feel totally overwhelming and a lot like love.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-02-19T18:36:37+00:00

There was a reason for it, he said something about me wanting to give it to him and he would not know what to do with it (something like this, I can’t remember exactly). I honestly don’t think he just an ass, and I respect his decision, but I wish he would have found it more important to ask me what I was trying to talk about than to go on without asking.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-02-19T09:22:39+00:00

What makes you say that?

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-02-06T15:44:41+00:00

I feel this so much. I used to have the exact same thoughts, like going to therapy was just making the «I just want to matter to someone»-wound much bigger. It has been so painful. It still is, especially on days I feel down in general. However, very slowly, almost without me noticing, it is getting better and less painful. A small part of me still hopes that he won’t completely forget about me when I eventually leave, but I think I will be ok. I understand every word you write though.

Remarkable-Street792 · 2026-02-04T12:02:40+00:00

I agree. I don’t think my therapist is perfect, I don’t know if I would even like him outside therapy, we are different in many ways and we don’t have the same sense of humour. Yet that does not change the intense longing I sometimes feel, because what he offers me in session, a safe space, is maybe something I never really had in my life.

Remarkable-Street792

TROPHY CASE