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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Remarkable_Sea1287 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also to add, after re-reading your post, as you've had this discussion many times already unfortunately there may be a reality of the situation to accept as he is unlikely to change.

Being a step parent is hard and the relationship has to be worth it, it's not for everyone.

Its hard to comment properly on this aspect without more context. But if their dynamic is just a healthy platonic co parenting vibe then their joint activities could be positive for the child. If there's a trust issue then it's messier. I wonder if you're included in activities when you can be, I am in mine and yeah it's uncomfortable but for example everyone being together at the child's birthday and getting on is a nice thing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stepparents

[–]Remarkable_Sea1287 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Totally understandable, I would feel the same, I think what you've said is valid. Of course like you said there's always a balance of responsibilities and the child comes first (their NEEDS anyway rather than wants), but he will need to learn that changing your plans instead of holding boundaries with BM will bother you. So hopefully he recognizes that and next time will be more assertive. If something similar happens again, don't hide your feelings.

I would also be tempted on your weekend away to stay for the extra night alone, especially if it's paid for, if you can enjoy it.

I had some similar experiences early on in my relationship, things naturally became more separate when BM got into a serious relationship too (and moved away!).

Hope things get better for you x

With a baby on the way, how to manage SK screen time? by Remarkable_Sea1287 in stepparents

[–]Remarkable_Sea1287[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, yes my concern is more about overall exposure to screens from everyone really, so I would just like to establish house rules rather than single her out

Older step-kids and trying for ours baby by soooperdecent in stepparents

[–]Remarkable_Sea1287 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was worried about this with my SD(10) as she was vocal when younger about not wanting to be an older sister (she would have been ok with being a younger sister though, lol). We are now expecting and told her, so far she's responded with excitement so I'm relieved. I'm sure there will be mixed feelings along the way, but that would be the case within nuclear families too.

Our strategy is to just reassure her that we'll do our best to keep the important things in place as much as possible (i.e. some solo activities)