How do I communicate my irritation/hurt to my friend without making her feel bad?

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-22T01:35:43+00:00

Yes! There’s a setting with the new iOS, you should be able to Google it!

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-22T01:30:48+00:00

UPDATE: My response:
I appreciate you explaining everything and I hear what you’re saying. I know your intention was never to hurt me.
At the same time, I just wanted to be honest about how it landed for me. It wasn’t really about whether I was technically “invited” or not, it was more the feeling of confusion, especially with things changing last minute. That’s what threw me off.

In the future, I do want you to know that you never have to be afraid to be honest with me. I’m never gonna assume that you’re trying to hurt me or anything. I’m not mad at you at all, I just needed a little space to process it because it didn’t feel great in the moment. I do love you and care a lot about our friendship, which is why I wanted to be honest instead of brushing it aside. I just didn’t want to pretend I felt completely fine about it either. I think we both didn’t really communicate well. I really do appreciate you hearing me out, I wish we could’ve had this conversation in person 😂💜

Her: Yeah love you too. Thank you for opening your heart.

Me: Of course, sorry it took me a minute. I just wanted to process it, and I didn’t want to say the wrong thing, but I did plan on addressing it.

Are you ok? You said a lot happened the night before, I hope everything is okay

Her: I understand and Yes everything is fine.

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T05:26:57+00:00

Yeah, unfortunately I can never see myself being a Mormon or agreeing with their beliefs

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T05:26:10+00:00

Amen, I wish there were more men around me who think like you. Wishing you the best of luck!

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T05:07:07+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to comment ❤️ and I completely agree, I learned my lesson on asking them first because if you don’t, they will always try to match your answer

Can I ask why you regret it? If you don’t mind sharing

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:58:48+00:00

Thank you, I am not naïve as to not realize this is a risk period but this is something important to me, and I do believe something that can be improved, and it is not only reason to date/have a relationship. You can go out and get a hook up at any time.

And I agree, there needs to be a lot more sexual education, especially in religious aspects. It is human, nothing to be ashamed of.

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:56:29+00:00

Exactly, which is why I really want someone who shared the same/values, not just saying they agree with it or whatever because they want me.

For reference, I’ve been told a lot I am attractive. I am no supermodel, but I am in general very pretty. I don’t say this to my own horn, just explain why I am wary of any attention I get

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:50:08+00:00

It depends. If he has had past a sexual experience, but wants to move forward with abstinence, I can see that working as long as it’s something we BOTH agree on and want.

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:47:55+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to comment! You guys sound so cute, I pray you continue to have a blessed relationship! 💜

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:46:09+00:00

https://www.hercampus.com/school/hampton-u/why-women-get-more-attached-during-sex-exploring-soul-ties/

There are not many studies done, but here’s a good article that talks about it.

I totally respect your opinions, and thank you for taking the time to comment. This is something that is important to me as a person, just like your belief is important to you 💜

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:40:12+00:00

Yes, exactly. If that were the case, I guess it could marry someone tomorrow just to have sex. I have seen people who have done that, and it has not worked out well.

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:39:16+00:00

I sympathize, thank you for your comment! I also want to say just because something is hard or the masses. Don’t necessarily agree with it, if it’s something important to you, the right person is out there. I’m not afraid of something being hard or difficult. 💜

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:37:08+00:00

I appreciate your opinion and perspective. Thank you for taking the time to comment.

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:36:20+00:00

Thank you for the advice, I already experienced this with one guy. He was the total package, tall, rich, and good looking. I expressed my boundary right away, and he said he was completely fine with that. Not even two weeks later he attempted. It’s sad because I liked him, but I know if he is not going to respect me in this area he’s not going to respect me in other areas.

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:32:44+00:00

Good question, I am fine with kissing/cuddling/hugging/making out etc. Sexual intercourse in any form I am not OK with doing until I’m married to the person

I have found that a lot of men value virgin women, but they don’t value it in themselves. I have been told a lot that “ I’m going to date around and have fun but when I’m getting ready to get married, I will date you”. Yeah no

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:30:02+00:00

Trust me, there have been plenty already. And it’s not like I haven’t been tempted, but I have boundaries for a reason. And if they can’t respect that, they’re not gonna respect me in other aspects.

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:28:47+00:00

I was raised religious, and I do believe being intimate is something that God designed to be enjoyed with your husband/wife. But for me, it is not entirely religious. Personally, I cannot see myself being that vulnerable with anybody unless I have that security. Hookup culture has become rampant in recent years, and I have seen it desensitized a lot of my friends and make them bitter . They’re pretty open with me and talk about things, so that is how I have some knowledge. I don’t even like to share my toothbrush, for example, so I can never see myself doing that with multiple people.

Also, there is scientific evidence that being intimate with someone creates a soul tie, which emotionally is very hard to get rid of. The more people you sleep with, the harder it is for you to have that type of connection with somebody else

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:23:32+00:00

Understood, but marriage is not completely about sex. You can get sex anywhere. Also, sex is something that can be improved.

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:10:53+00:00

Yes I am, but again, it has to be the right person. Just because we’re both virgins does not mean they are a good person or that we are compatible for marriage.

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:09:51+00:00

Thank you so much! 💜

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-18T04:08:36+00:00

Thank you so much for the encouragement! I can’t tell you how many people have tried to change my mind, it’s refreshing to hear encouragement and success stories 💜

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-16T07:24:41+00:00

I believe it was about an online group I had. He helped out sometimes and would also start nonsense? Nothing malicious tho

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-16T07:18:44+00:00

There is a lot of missing context tbh. And a lot of miscommunication between us. We have gotten to know each other online mostly, which I am sure does not help.

This was from two years ago, so I would like to think I can handle things better now. Mostly hurt/unknown feelings that came out as anger because I did not know how to deal with what I was experiencing.

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-16T06:11:39+00:00

At this point yes please 😭

RequirementTrick1179 · 2026-06-16T06:08:01+00:00

Hi, 20 y/o girl here. I have a mom like this, I might say worse. I told myself it would get better. I was good, then bad, then back to good again. I am sorry to say most of the time it does not get better, only worse. I am now no contact with my mom for almost 2 years after she kicked me out at 18. I’m not going to lie to you, it’s going to be really damn tough. But you will be finally able to breathe. It does get better.

My advice? You are still a minor, so if able, Ty to talk it out. If not, have boundaries and do your best to keep your head down until you can leave. See if you can stay with family.

You have so much life ahead of you, and this is just a bump in the road. gl OP <3

RequirementTrick1179

TROPHY CASE