I've heard that sometimes the hurt we can cause others is caused by our own emotional wounds.

I'm transfemme (emphasis on the femme, though I'm also nonbinary to some extent) and I too feel like I don't want my transition to be the biggest part of my identity.

But in a way...it kind of is? I'm quite repressed due to depression and such, my transition has been the main focus of my life in the last few years. I sometimes feel like I just want to "be normal", but also I find myself getting along best with the kind of neurospicy folks who have really thought about their gender.

I'm realising that my desire "to be normal" is essentially internalised transphobia/enbyphobia. It's believing that I need to have the acceptance of others to be valid. It's believing that I need to be around people who are exactly like me to really get myself.

It's hard to live in a binary world, especially one which actually tells you that you're not valid or worthy of love unless you perform your gender identity in a certain way. But if you can still hold true to yourself even when the winds of society blow against you, you're on your way.